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Inter caste marriages

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Which ever way anyone chooses to promote caste intergration please make sure no one converts to another religion.
Let Hindus remain Hindus.
In most interreligous marriages Hindus are always at the losing end.


renu,

i agree with your sentiments.

why the hindus rule out interreligious marriages, is the faut of ourselves. how many of us willingly open our arms to marry someone from another faith, and introduce her and induce her to become part of our culture?

just look at the opposition to intra hindu inter caste marraiges here ie close to 40%. i wonder how many, of those who accept intercaste marriages would be willing to an arranged marriage of their son/daughter to a child of mixed marriages of any sort.

so what we find, is that people just leave the faith. without any acknowledgement or fight. let the narrow minded bigots keep their religion and caste, till they find themselves holding an empty vessel.

that time is not any distant future. it is now. look at all the distressed young men here who are pining away to get married, only to see the male biological clock ticking adversely in their future.

thank you.
 
Well said Dr.Renuka ji, :thumb:

I think we Hindu were least bothered about having substantial population. We are one among the minority communities internationally.. Might be because we Hindus lack unity among our self due to cast systems.

Today morning, I just had a casual discussion with one of my Arabic colleagues. He says that Islam could wide spread globally because of the initiative that our people have taken long before. We are proud to be in majority than Christians and Jews as per statistical reports.

I asked him - Why you people are so concerned about your population and why still you encourage and support your boys marrying a Christian girls to increase your population?

He said - This is the instructions of ALLAH. As per ALLAH'S instruction (That's been clearly stated in Quran), we are carrying out the orders and could now succeed. We obey our principles sincerely and we are true Muslims.

Do we Hindus really have any such missions?

I asked this question to my self....

ravi,

yes both the christians and the moslems insist on conversion of a spouse. usually i found in the west, the christian gives in. in malaysia and perhaps in mid east, it is the law - that one may not convert out of islam.

on another viewpoint - i find the xtian, muslim or even the NB guys uninhibited by traditions, scriptures what have you, in their efforts to find a mate.

they have no confining parameters, and in the process, are able to hunt for their spouse across lands, religions and communities. by and large, to a muslim, another muslim is ok. other religions are ok, once they convert.

just look at that, against the handicap that we load on our boys, with our doctrinaire approach to marriage.

not only should they have a great job, but also young, handsome, no drinking, no smoking, vegetarian, jadghagam match, society match, job match etc etc. it is such a load that it is even surprising how so many still win the race.

just imagine, if our boys did not have these strictures and they are on level playing fields with other boys. i guess, it cannot be imagined, for now atleast. :(

thank you.
 
ravi,


just look at that, against the handicap that we load on our boys, with our doctrinaire approach to marriage.

not only should they have a great job, but also young, handsome, no drinking, no smoking, vegetarian, jadghagam match, society match, job match etc etc. it is such a load that it is even surprising how so many still win the race.

just imagine, if our boys did not have these strictures and they are on level playing fields with other boys. i guess, it cannot be imagined, for now atleast. :(

thank you.

Why just boys?. Even our girls are loaded with handicaps, restrictions and expectations. Even our girls are literally coerced into studying certain subjects ie engineering, science, medicine, computers so that they can have great jobs and then they would be able to get better "quality" of boys. Great job, fair, beautiful, tall, jadhagam, cooking, singing, dancing and a lot more expected of our girls as well, I feel and not just boys. If some girls are more domesticated and want to study commerce or are not ambitious and aspire to be homemakers, relatives will bemoan that they would be hard to be married off. Our girls are equally pressurised, if not more than our boys.

The trend these days is one wants a high acheiver, they have to be equally high achieving whether its our boys or our girls.
 
Dear Kunjuppu Sir,

You know one actually marries another who is similar to us in thoughts and behaviour.
I will give you an example my own example.
I accepted a marriage proposal from my husband because his family background was similar to mine, I am a doctor so i prefered a proffesional .He is an engineeer.
He did not drink and smoke.Had faith in God but not too traditional in outlook.
He didnt mind me being a vegetarian.
I need not cook non veg for him (he is veg now,own choice)
All the others who had proposed insisted I eat non veg to which I had said no and did not accept the proposals.
My husband seemed similar to me and we got married.Mine is an arranged marriage.
My husband is a malayalee and I am a tamilian.
We dont feel different because we consider ourselves Indians and Hindus.
We practise an Indian lifestyle with emphasis given to Fundamentals Of Hinduism which can cut across all man made differences.

renuka
 
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Sri Kunjuppu asked:-

"i wonder how many, of those who accept intercaste marriages would be willing to an arranged marriage of their son/daughter to a child of mixed marriages of any sort."

I and my wife would be more than happy for such an arrangement (unfortunately, we don't have someone close to us though!).

I am born in the Iyengar faith. As recently as 3 years back when seeking an alliance for an iyengar boy, I approached all sorts of brahmins. I still remember - one smartha from thiru-anaikkaa (near trichy) sarcastically laughed at me when I was seeking alliance between alliance with his daughter. He not only refused but said he had not come that low to seek alliance from a different sect; one vadama from madurai refused to talk to me (his wife all very keen until she knew the boy was not vadama, but a vadakalai; poor woman felt very bad after that since she knew it was not going to happen).

I really laugh at the parents demanding for tee-totaler boys; what would they do if the boy pick up the habit hence the marriage? would the parents of the bride demand for a divorce?

Cheers!
 
Dear Happyhinduji

Namaskarams


The Government of Tamilnadu has started Schools for Archakas in some temples. Prior to 1996, though the TN Government insisted that poojas be held in Tamil, they did not want to hold out that the Hindu literature in Tamil had its glorious place. In a symposium in 1996, I presented a paper on the heritage value of temples, the literary works, the architecture, the Shilpas, the art, dance and music associated with it. The Minister for Tamil Development and Culture called me aside after the symposium, appreciated my paper and we had a one to one discussion for a few days following that. The result was that the Tamil development and culture and HR & CE ministries were combined in 1997. But in 2001 for political reasons, the next political dispensation dismantled the set-up. As follow up of the views expressed by me to the Minister, from 1997-98 onwards, the TN Government started Schools for Thevaram, Naalayiram and Tirumurais, Natyam, traditional music, Nagaswaram in various temples. Every year in five temples the schools were established. The natural extension of this scheme is the Schools for the Archakas and other disciplines as part of some of the temples. In a way, my presentation has been a catalyst. This seems to be a long drawn process. I do not think that these can be established over night in many places, given the lack of interest in religious activities by the Government.

Dear Sir,

You have done a yeoman's service. Did not know i was speaking to a pioneer. My humble regards to you.

Are there any ways to include sanskrit worship in temples as well - in the similar lines of how you have written above?

In all other lingusitic groups, there are examples of NBs producing literature / writings in Sanskrit. Amongst Tamilans, dunno if NBs have produced Sanskrit literature.

Come to think of it, Prof Pitchappan has mentioned in one paper that 'dravidian' may not even be a linguistic group - its just a culture.

Its high time, tamilians are also made aware that sanskrit is not an alien language or culture to them.

In terms of an all-inclusive society, yes, it will take time - a lot of time. But it is acheivable.

If modernisation itself can change so many things within our lifetime, then surely a few changes at the level of the matts and temples will produce effects that will be visible within our lifetime.

Each time a 'dalit' converts (to christianity or islam), the missionaries put in the anti-hindu sentiment in them.

Most of the converts are brainwashed into the idea that they will never be given a good place in hindusim. The result is that converts somehow carry some amount of anger against caste hindus, and brahmins in particular.

This conversion thing is actually a potential threat to the interests of the state. You might have heard of naxals who have a special hatered for so-called 'upper caste' police people.

This caste things sir (to me) is just not worth all the negativites it has produced / continue to produce. Nobody loses anything by welcoming others to their fold.

Infact, i thot it wud be a good idea to convert all the tribals into so-called 'kshatriyas' because indeed they are warrior tribes that did not integrate into mainstream hindusim. But now i learn that the so-called 'dalits' are keen on becoming priests (and are not interested in anything else)...

These things may not be digestable for the older folk. But thankfully, they are the older ones.

Amongst the younger folk , it is rare to find ppl interested in 'caste'...and in the next generation or so, i don't think it will exist at all...

To admit kids into vedic schools, naturally there needs to be stringent admission rules. They will need to live in the hostels, change their lifestyles, and ensure adherence to all requirements.

And ofcourse the old aadheenams, old temples, and places where priesthood is already fixed as a heredity practice, will not be touched. It wud sheer paapam to snatch the livelihood of such families.

If tamilbrahmins.com can start a trust to help the poor, hope they will also make a wing that will takes care of temple repairs and ensures regular prayers in old temples.

Best regards.
 
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Dear Sir,

.................................
These things may not be digestable for the older folk. But thankfully, they are the older ones.

Amongst the younger folk , it is rare to find ppl interested in 'caste'...and in the next generation or so, i don't think it will exist at all...
..........................................................

.................................


Best regards.

Without adding any comments, I am attaching a link to one of today's newspaper articles, which I feel may be relevant to the context especially in the light of above quoted observations.


http://epaper.hindustantimes.com/ArticleImage.aspx?article=25_12_2009_003_011&mode=undefinedhttp://epaper.hindustantimes.com/ArticleImage.aspx?article=25_12_2009_003_011&mode=1

http://epaper.hindustantimes.com/ArticleImage.aspx?article=25_12_2009_015_002&mode=1

(page 3 & page 13)
Greetings
 
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Without adding any comments, I am attaching a link to one of today's newspaper articles, which I feel may be relevant to the context especially in the light of above quoted observations.


HindustanTimes ePaper - Article

HindustanTimes ePaper - Article

(page 3 & page 13)
Greetings

The links are not working.

But i read the hindustantimes pages 3 and 13.

Why only Dinakaran, the whole Madhu Koda story is in the open, Mayawati has accumulated million in benami assets, Karunanidhi and the DK goons does not ever seem to feel satisfied with accumulating corrupt money..

Politicians will always ab(use) caste - as long as caste exists, it will be abused.

The only way to remove 'caste' is to get the jaati-dharma declared as invalid in today's times by the shankara mutts, and request them to set the path to equality.

The path to equality will take time, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.

One cannot keep an apple and eat it too. One cannot keep caste (in its current form) and expect it not to be misused.

Regards.
 
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I suppose you are missing the point of the series of posts I made under Enge Srivaishnavam. The point was not who should be included as B's, it was to point out even the so called Brahmins among Azhvars rejected treating bhagavathas bady based on caste and yet these bad treatments are routiney carried out in Sri Vaishnava institutions today.

Sir, this is actually new to me.

i know some NB bhagavathas (though i do not speak to them abt religion / religious practices; but now i have started to do so). They do not think there is any negative treatment extended to NB bhagavathas.

Actually, they say they are not interested in so many prayers, homas, etc (all so complicated, requires dedication, memorization and practice, etc according to them). In short, they are not interested in all those practices; or rather; they are not interested in becoming 'brahmins'.

They respect brahmins; and i think that respect comes from the fact that they have seen from close quarters what all work is involved (ritualism is no joke, not simple, and one cannot argue abt its meaningfulness, according to them). They point out that i cannot stay away from praying, and going to temples either, so i too am a ritualist - which ofcourse is very true (i realize that i really need to do a lot of introspection instead of talking :) ).

Anyways to sum up, they seem pretty happy being bhagavathas. According to them, brahmins have their job and we have ours (and they are not interested in confusing or mixing both. They wish to keep it seperate). And they absolutely do not agree that there is any -ve treatment made out to NB bhagavatas based on caste.

Regards.
 
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thank you amala for your rather surprising post.

surprising because, i was not aware of any 'pressure' applied on the girls, in india. i know here in toronto, only of one family, of girls, where the mother pushed them to better academic performance and hence better jobs.

most of the girls of my family in india, have had it easy. what is surprising though, is in one generation, we have moved from low to low-middle on the economic scale to upper upper-middle. the girls especially have been the beneficiaries, i think, for they have had the best of education (india/abroad) & lavish marriages, all bestowed on by willing parents, and above all, very very expectant daughters.

amala, your note re pressure put on girls in india, may be one of the reasons, that they have become such high achievers, besting out the males in whatever field they enter. it is but natural, i think, for these girls not to settle for guys whom they think are slobs or froths.

also, deep inside, the girls' upward mobility through sheer effort, is a darwinian exercise, i think, ensuring the survival of the fittest. to an individual, even without knowing, operating on such darwinian principles, i am quite sure, it would come as a rude jarring, when parents suddenly interfere, and try to take away one of the prime plums of rewards ie the process of choosing a spouse. that too, based on antiquated (from the girls' viewpoint) relevancy to family and astrology and such like.

perhaps, this is where our girls, whom i think are not all that innocent or shy or dumb, opt for marriages outiside the ammanji circle. this opt out could result in the choice of young handsome high energy high achieving executives OR due tothe dominant personality of these girls, they opt for mild mousey obedient timid husbands (i have seen a few of these and these guys are a delight - one such relative by marriage, if his wife asks him to jump, we almost expect him to respond 'how high?') :)

thank you.
 
renu,

i agree with you 100%. your norms, values and pan hinduism in the best of sense, is a model, i have seen work successfully in the 2nd generation north american desis.

good stuff!! the best of both the worlds :)
 
....... They do not think there is any negative treatment extended to NB bhagavathas.

Dear HH,

The NB SV's you know probably practice the humility Azhvars sang about. So it is not surprising they have accepted the way things are and focusing on Bhakti and dedication.

In this context, it is probably instructive to remind ourselevs of Swami Sri Periyavachchan Pillai's words, that due to "low" birth status, humility comes easily for NB bhagavathas. So, Swami goes on, the high born Brahmin should fall at their feet in order to mitigate their birth based "garvam".

This "garvam" among today's SV's is alive and well. In practice, I have personally witnessed the discrimintory treatment meted out by B SV's of both sects upon NB's in general, including SV NB's countless times, I don't care to count the number of times.

best wishes HH.....
 
thank you amala for your rather surprising post.

surprising because, i was not aware of any 'pressure' applied on the girls, in india. i know here in toronto, only of one family, of girls, where the mother pushed them to better academic performance and hence better jobs.

most of the girls of my family in india, have had it easy. what is surprising though, is in one generation, we have moved from low to low-middle on the economic scale to upper upper-middle. the girls especially have been the beneficiaries, i think, for they have had the best of education (india/abroad) & lavish marriages, all bestowed on by willing parents, and above all, very very expectant daughters.

amala, your note re pressure put on girls in india, may be one of the reasons, that they have become such high achievers, besting out the males in whatever field they enter. it is but natural, i think, for these girls not to settle for guys whom they think are slobs or froths.

also, deep inside, the girls' upward mobility through sheer effort, is a darwinian exercise, i think, ensuring the survival of the fittest. to an individual, even without knowing, operating on such darwinian principles, i am quite sure, it would come as a rude jarring, when parents suddenly interfere, and try to take away one of the prime plums of rewards ie the process of choosing a spouse. that too, based on antiquated (from the girls' viewpoint) relevancy to family and astrology and such like.

perhaps, this is where our girls, whom i think are not all that innocent or shy or dumb, opt for marriages outiside the ammanji circle. this opt out could result in the choice of young handsome high energy high achieving executives OR due tothe dominant personality of these girls, they opt for mild mousey obedient timid husbands (i have seen a few of these and these guys are a delight - one such relative by marriage, if his wife asks him to jump, we almost expect him to respond 'how high?') :)

thank you.

I think my generation of relatives and family friends that I know of have tremendous pressure to study certain subjects/degrees in college. Also nowadays so many women have MS/MBA and in many arranged marriages the boys side do want employable women and they even state what qualifications if preferable ie MBBS, MS, B Eng etc. Just look at many matri sites. So expectation is equally high on both sides.

Yes this upward mobility may perhaps come as a rude jarring to all concerned especially the boys side who want educated girls with good jobs and earn a lot but expect her to be mute, compromising et al. One can't cut their cake and have it too. Somethings gotta give.

I'm not sure I agree that girls opt for marriages outside the community because they want handsome, high flying execs all of whom you have plenty in the community boys or because of their dominant personalities wanting mousey men. I'm sure there are less calculating reasons like they happen to fall in love outside the umm to use your word ammanji circle.

Also boys side of the community have long lists when it comes to girls in an arranged marriage. If you marry out of the community, its a little easier, apparently.
 
...............yes this upward mobility may perhaps come as a rude jarring to all concerned especially the boys side who want educated girls with good jobs and earn a lot but expect her to be mute, compromising et al. One can't cut their cake and have it too. Somethings gotta give.

.........
Also boys side of the community have long lists when it comes to girls in an arranged marriage. If you marry out of the community, its a little easier, apparently.

அடி சக்கை!!!!!!! போட்டாரே ஒரு போடு !!!!!!!! :) :)
 
......
in other religions no one dare question, oppose or disbelieve. all hell will break loose and heads will roll.

Dear sister renuka, I am with you with many things you say, about marriage and stuff like that. But if I were a person of Hindu faith, I will be a little less sanguine about Hinduism's freedoms and the intolerance of other religions. I am afraid you are using a rather broad brush.

(Many are now gasping, here he goes again, :), but somebody has to do this, or else TB will be floating in self fulfilling lake of pride and self-congratulation :).)

Christianity is not a monolith. On the one end we have nut cases like Dobson, Rick Warren and other gay hating, Jew loathing (they support Israel in a macabre way) evangelicals. Then there are Catholic, a little moderate in someways and equally retrograde in others. Then there is Anglican and Episcopalians, some of whom even concede that many biblical stories including crucifixion and resurrection as allegorical in nature and not literal. Finally, on the other extreme we have Unitarian Universalists church who are more progressive than any Hindus progressive.

The case of Islam is more complicated. They have armed jihad in their scriptures. They also subscribe to such abominations like the concept of Dar-ul-Islam and Dar-ul-Harb, dhimmy, umma and kafir, extreme laws against women.

But even Islam is not a monolith. There are gentle sects within Islam, such as, Ahmadees and Sufis. But, unfortunately, they are marginalized. Some sunny muslims even think these are not Muslims.

But, the west must understand the history if it is not to be repeated. It is the shortsighted US foreign policy starting with FDR's Faustian deal with the Saudi family, and countless other stupid interventions including Iran in the early 50's, which is now coming home to roost. The US has been the stalwart supporter of all the oppressive regimes in Islamic countries, starting from Algeria in the western Africa to the brutal Suharto regime of Indonesia. Much of the religious extremism comes from these countries ruled by oppressive regimes. Countries where the Muslims enjoy a modicum of freedom, like in India and Turkey, tend to be quite tolerant of others. In spite of the intolerance coded deep into their scriptures, extremism is found only in oppressive environments. Backwardness is another contributing factor also. So, the intolerance is astutely encouraged for political reasons by all sides. Common Muslim wants to pray 5 times and be left alone, just as a common Hindu. Both are blissfully unaware of the poison in their scriptures.

Please permit me to cite two personal instances in this context. One of my close friends, who happens to be from an orthodox Vadama family, married a Christian girl. She adopted the Brahmin ways of her in-laws. A young SV I know, who recites all the 4000 verses from memory, I say this to emphasize the orthodox nature of his family, married a Muslim girl from Hyderabad. Until the time I gave up on SV, I used see him come to temple regularly and participate in the sevakalam -- in other words he continued to be a SV even after marrying a muslim girl. His wife used to come to the temple with him, but she was never accepted by the Brahmins of the Goshti.

Now, about Hindus. Because of the insular nature of caste system, Hindus never went for proselytisation. In a perverse way, the proseleytizers are motivated by goodwill for the soul. On the other hand, the Hindus left others alone not because of respectful tolerance, but because the others are unclean and unworthy.

Further, Hindus became dominant in India by overcoming Bhuddists and Jains by force. There was no freedom to think for them. Let me cite couple of verses from the 4000 dhivya prabhandams. Be forewarned, these sound quite vile.

வெறுப்போடு சமணர் முண்டர், விதியில் சாக்கியர்கள், நின்பால்
பொறுப்பரியனகள் பேசில் போவதே நோய் அதாகி
குறிப்பெனக் கடையும் ஆகில், கூடுமேல் தலையை ஆங்கே
அறுப்பதே கருமம் கண்டாய், அரங்க மாநகர் உளானே.
தொண்டர் அடிப்பொடி ஆழ்வாரின் திருமாலை, 8ம் பாசுரம்
In this pasuram Thondaradippodi Azhvar declares that it is his duty to cut the heads off of Jains, Buddhists, and Sankhyas.

தர்க்கச் சமணரும் சாக்கியப் பேய்களும், தாழ்சடையோன்
சொற்கற்ற சோம்பரும் சூனிய வாதரும், நான்மறையும்
நிற்கக் குறும்புசெய் நீசரும் மாண்டனர் நீள் நிலத்தே
பொற்கற்பகம் எம் இராமானுச முனி போந்த பின்னே.
இராமானுச நூற்றந்தாதி #99
Talk about harsh language -- here, Thiruvarangaththu Amudhanaar uses some against all, Jains, Sankhyas, Saivas, and everyone who misinterprets Vedas.

There are stories that in Karnataka, Ramanuja defeated Jains in a debate and two options were given the vanquished, (i) join SV, or (ii) be put to death. Sounds very much like some Sunny Wahhabi.

Having studied Ramanuja's life history, I am quite surprised with stories like this. Ramanuja is routinely portrayed as an ocean of compassion. The same Amudhanar, in a different verse uses the phrase, "காரேய் கருணை இராமானுச", and yet talks of putting the defeated opponents to death. May be these are allegorical, but that could very well be self-serving rationalization.

Then there were the attempts on Ramanuja's life, once by Yadavaprakasha motivated by jealousy, and Nalooran motivated by religious bigotry. In this instance, heads did roll, Periya Nabmi lost his life and Koorathazvan lost both his eyes.

Cheers!
 
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Dear sister renuka, I am with you with many things you say, about marriage and stuff like that. But if I were a person of Hindu faith, I will be a little less sanguine about Hinduism's freedoms and the intolerance of other religions. I am afraid you are using a rather broad brush.

(Many are now gasping, here he goes again, :), but somebody has to do this, or else TB will be floating in self fulfilling lake of pride and self-congratulation :).)

Cheers!

Naraji,

I sincerely doubt that anyone is gasping...anymore. Most of us are aware that you're the forum's resident rebel/iconoclast :). And I don't mean that as a criticism/complaint.

Also I don't mean to put words in Dr. Renujis mouth but I'm sure she meant the Hindu faith has more freedom relative to other faiths. Surely you have to consider the time scale. With all due respect, quoting Ramanujacharya and heads rolling etc of 11th century is rather disingenuous no? Hinduism of today has evolved just like other faiths. 11th century morality is different from today.
 
Dear NaraJi,

You know I consider you a truly spiritual person who actually has full faith in God without actually acknowledging it or realising it.
You analyse literally everything that comes your way and your Viveka faculty is in the best of function.
You might not agree with me I know but just accept this from me.
You are not a sceptic as I thought initially but i would rather call you a Jijnaasu.
 
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Sri.Nara said:-

"But even Islam is not a monolith. There are gentle sects within Islam, such as, Ahmadees and Sufis. But, unfortunately, they are marginalized. Some sunny muslims even think these are not Muslims."

Sri. Nara,

I am afraid you have not addressed Islam in detail. If you are going to quote 8th century Thondaradi Podi Azhwar (You are right in quoting that pasuram. I stopped reciting dhivya prabhandham after reciting that pasuram. How ever...) then you should be comparing Islam and Christianity of the 8th century. You can't just jog along and take 8th century Hinduism and compare it to 21st century Christianity. (Not that 21st century Hinduism is virgin snow.....). If you are going to seriously compare the religions, then that can be done. (I already know the winner; it is not hinduism). But I can show Hinduism is comparitively tolerant to some other faiths. (I am not batting for hinduism; how ever, I don't like to see other intolerant religions slip through).

Cheers!
 
Sow.Sri.Amala said:-

"expectation is equally high on both sides."

That is true and funny too! I went through the matrimony site for my son. If the girl has any health related qualifications like nurse or physiotherapist, they look for a doctor at the minimum! If the girl has a bachelor's degree, then the expectation is minimum master's degree! My son said he did not want to skim these unrealistic sites (sites like Tamil matrimony). Truth is, after asking for all these high qualifications, they do settle for a bachelor's degree anyway! Why not be honest in the first place?
 
Dear Naraji,

I did not actually know about the whole Ramanuja episode till you brought it up in your post.
I am actually glad to know that.I personally feel Hindus should also have a "fighter" spirit not as to go on a killing or suicide bomber spree but just maintain a "dont mess with me" image.
You know in Malaysia, christian missionaries actualy do come from home to home to preach about their religion.
They dare not enter a muslim house.
Even if you politely tell them "thank you but I already have my own religion" they will still insists you hear them out.
Why they dare not do this with a Muslim?
I think you know the answer.
Most Non Hindus view Hindus as easy prey and can be pushed over and easily conquered.
May be its the image of all forgiving and accomodating which we have.
I respect all religions and fully understand Ekam Sat Viprah Bahuda Vadanti but its no harm being defensive at times.

renuka
 
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...then you should be comparing Islam and Christianity of the 8th century.


Dear Raghy,
How about a comparison based on the age of the religion? The younger a religion is, perhaps one can expect it to be more hard core, can't we not?

Islam started in the 7th century and it is now about 1400 years old. At the time Jains and Buddists were defeated and given a grave choice between life and death, Hinduism was about say 3000 years, or some Sanatana Dharmees may say, forever.

But Raghy, I was not trying to compare religions in terms of tolerance. I was only trying to show that Hindus were pretty intolerant themselves.

For Hindus tolerance means not interfering in other's faith. But, this noninterference is not out of respect, but because of contempt. Even after converting to Hinduism, the western Isconites are not allowed to enter Sri Rangam temple, may be other temples also, I don't know. How tolerant is this? The Muslims, who are widely thought of as more intolerant, with some justification, are quite tolerant in this respect, no?

I find religion in general to be quite intolerant. What good act is possible only to the religious? Name me one. I can name several evil acts that even an otherwise good person will engage in only due to religious persuasion.

So religion, what is it good for? Scaring the begeezes out of everyone in order to control the population and bring some sort of order to society that benefits those who have already made it to the top?

When it comes to tolerance, no religion comes out shining, not even Buddists -- just look at Sri Lanka.

Cheers!
 
Most Non Hindus view Hindus as easy prey and can be pushed over and easily conquered.


No my friend, Hinuds have survived the onslaught of Islam and the Christianity of the British. Malaysia and Indonesia did not survive Islamic onslaught. Many ex-British colonies of Africa did not survive Christianity. Hindus have proved time and again they are a resilient lot. Their threat is mostly from within, not without.

HH has it right, there is not much point blaming the missionaries for the conversions, Hindus must look within for their inability to accept everyone as equals.

Cheers!

p.s. After reading your and Amala's posts my wife said I have become an expert in fooling everyone (ஊரை எமாத்தரத்துல நீங்கதான் expert). I know I can do this only some of the time, not to everyone all the time :)
 
Sri Raghy ji,

You have highlighted the fact....

Your son is correct...

I used to think on the same lines...I am also going through lots of sites desperately. But enjoying very much to see how the girls are dreaming...It's looking cute as well.

The girls who all are looking for a guy with higher qualification than theirs, seems to be accepting a guy of equal qualification at last as if she is getting into a great deal sacrificing her expectations and scrapping the bottom of the barrel.

This makes me feel pity for such girls.

I feel that girls should seek for a guy generally indicating her expectations as - "Qualified and well settled".

Whether a guy is over qualified or not, the basic selection process of a girl includes chatting with the guy and get to know much about him before marriage. A girl would not be marrying a guy just for his qualification and profession. To be happy in life, a girl needs a good husband as her life time the best friend.

---------------------------------------
Dear Ms.Amala,

I feel that your claims are true to some extent. But the girls are not at the receiving end in terms of boys expectations.

The parents are forcing their daughters to go for higher education so that they can meet the expectations of boys parents. I reiterate.......to meet the expectations of boys PARENT.......

Highly educated daughters can get into highly paid jobs and can help parents accumulating substantial amount to look for a well to do alliance. Off course to see that their daughters are well married off to a high class family and she lives a rich life.

I feel parents should not pressurize their daughters to do MBBS, BE and any other higher professional studies just to compete with other girls in the society. Such studies can be their daughter's own choice as per her choice and capabilities.

An educated girl, loving to be a house wife and be a good home maker are the preferences of today's boys. A girl, who be a good wife and a good and responsible MOM would make the life of the boys meaningful. Girls education can be just a source of confidence, knowledge and job opportunities when the need arise. Or to look for a comfortable job to keep herself busy and earn some extra bucks provided she could manage herself.

So, I feel, girls who all are simply educated, be at home or working, and prefer to be a home maker need to be much proud of themselves and still can have a good husband who can be her best friend till the destiny.

"A highly qualified and professional guy necessarily can not be a good husband. As well a highly qualified and professional girl necessarily can not be a good wife"
 
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Sri.Nara,

"How about a comparison based on the age of the religion? The younger a religion is, perhaps one can expect it to be more hard core, can't we not?"

Why would I do that? The age of a religion has nothing to with its ideology, hard core or soft core. secondly, the older the religion, the more chances for the 'reformers' to come along and make the religion more hard core by taking the religion back to its original form. Religion makes its followers to swing like a 'yo,yo'. If you are trying to find some rationality in religion, good luck to you, my friend!

"Islam started in the 7th century and it is now about 1400 years old. At the time Jains and Buddists were defeated and given a grave choice between life and death, Hinduism was about say 3000 years, or some Sanatana Dharmees may say, forever."

Islam started at the time of Adam. Adam was the first Muslim as per the Quran. But, yes, Prophet Muhammad rewrote the old testament in quran 1400 years ago. At that time Hinduism was either 1,000 years old or just started depending upon who says it, based on the time of Sri.Adi sankara. Hinduism as we know only started then. 3,000 years, forever ... such claims are as good as muslim claim that Adam, the first human being was a Muslim.

"But Raghy, I was not trying to compare religions in terms of tolerance. I was only trying to show that Hindus were pretty intolerant themselves."

now we are really talking! There is no ritual to convert one to Hinduism. I have wondered about that. We can't say 'upanayanam' as that ritual, because, upanayanam is conducted only in few castes, not all across hinduism. Intolerant? I don't think so.

"For Hindus tolerance means not interfering in other's faith. But, this noninterference is not out of respect, but because of contempt."

I beg to disagree with you. The non interference is, in most cases out of disinterest. It has nothing to do with respect. Most Hindus have very little knowledge about any religion leave alone Hinduism; it is only natural that they are dis-interested about other religions. If Hindus can really hold contempt, I don't think they would forget ethnic cleansing and forced slavery by other religions. Not all the Hindus are emotional like yourself (or myself).

"Even after converting to Hinduism, the western Isconites are not allowed to enter Sri Rangam temple, may be other temples also, I don't know."

Isconists do not say they have converted to Hinduism. But they call themselves Srivaishnavas. Never mind about other temples; they are not allowed in Puri Jagannath temple either. They make the pilgrimage; they provide so much social services. But are you blaming all the Hindus for that? You can't blame Brahmins in one thread and collectively blame all the Hindus in an other thread. You have to make up your mind; are you going to blame the brahminism and caste brahmins and upper NB caste for this or are you going to blame all the Hindus collectively for this? Not all the Hindus write the rules, you know? They are the victims too!

"The Muslims, who are widely thought of as more intolerant, with some justification, are quite tolerant in this respect, no?"

No.

"I find religion in general to be quite intolerant. What good act is possible only to the religious? Name me one. I can name several evil acts that even an otherwise good person will engage in only due to religious persuasion.

So religion, what is it good for? Scaring the begeezes out of everyone in order to control the population and bring some sort of order to society that benefits those who have already made it to the top?"

We are comparing poisonous snakes by the degree of venom they carry. All of a sudden why do you want to flip? I know one good thing in all the religions; if you follow a religion, any religion, you need not think. How is that? Everything is completely worked out for you. Just follow that. Now, is that a problem?

"When it comes to tolerance, no religion comes out shining, not even Buddists -- just look at Sri Lanka."

What do you mean not even Buddhists? I don't have to look at Sri Lanka. My country of birth, India has all the answers. Buddhists and Jains reduced the armies in the name of ahimsa, resulting in millions of death, millions or rape and millions of women and children taken as slaves. (Do you know the meaning of 'Hindu Kush?'). Buddhism was one of the reasons.

cheers!
 
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