kalyanam
On the day of Nitchayadhartham,Mappilai Warawhereppu is done.Garlands are exchanged too,between groom and brides.The elders agree about enetering into holy matrimony,and request all to bless.The brides younger brother adorns and makes a informal welcome in some families.
Agni, the god of fire, is central to most Hindu rites. Tradition has it that marriages be solemnized in his presence. Here he stands as the universal witness to the union. - Agni Shaakshi, accompanied by the Thozhan and Thozhi, the bride and groom take their first steps as man and wife to walk clockwise three times around the sacred fire to pay their respect to Agni, the representative of the gods. Certain rituals are performed while going around the fire.
At the end of the first round,Sapthapadi, taking seven steps facing north, is performed indicating the seven stages in the spiritual evolution of man and woman, after which the groom takes the right foot of his bride and places it on a granite stone, Ammi Midhidhal, and slips a Metty, a silver ring, on her second toe, indicating she be as strong and steadfast as the stone in the face of adversity.
On completing the second round the groom slips a second Metty on the second toe of her left foot. Arundhathi Paarthathul at this stage is the groom showing the bride the star Arundhathi. It is significant that Arundhathi, wife of the referred sage Vashistar, virtuous, chaste and devoted, was placed among the stars to be a model for all, both man and woman, to emulate.
At this moment the groom also is reminded that he remains chaste and faithful. This the priest does by drawing his attention to a cloth wrapped green branch of a tree with a myriad of oval thorns (here substituted by a stick) planted in a clay pot in front of the Manavarai. The thorns signifies the thousand eyed spectacle, Indra, the King of Heaven, was transformed into by the curse of sage Gautama for Indra's tryst with the beautiful Ahalya, the sages wife. This is a grim reminder of the price Indra paid for his indiscretion.
Ahalya turned by her husband's curse into a stone for her infidelity regains her human form purified and resplendent when the divine Rama, on his way to Mithilam, treads on it. This is the significancve of Ammi Midhidhal, the couple performed when they first circled the homam.
Modhiram Tedhudhal or finding the ring contest between the bride and the groom comes at the end of the third round.
This provides for a lighter moment eliciting giggles and chuckles as fingers play and flounder for the ring in the privacy of the pot.
Next, the couple perform the Poorna Ahuthi which is the offering of grains, honey and fruits to the gods through their representative Agni, in attendance as homam, the sacred fire, imploring them to bless and render their wedlock holy.
The Kanniga Dhanam ritual is the bride's parents giving their daughter's hand in marriage to the groom making her also a member of the groom's family. The priest calls the parents of the bride and the groom to the Manavarai.The priest pronounces the names of three generations of male foreparents, both living and dead, of the bride bride and groom inviting them to bear witness to the marriage and bless the couple. The bride's father, betel and coconut in hand, places his daughter's hand in the groom's hand indicating that the groom accept cherish and protect her all through life. The bride's mother indicates her consent by trickling water into hands of her husband, who gives a gold coin to the groom symbolic of giving away the bride. The groom accepts the coin and in turn gives it to his parents. This signifies the acceptance of the bride by the groom and his family.
The groom then presents the Koorai and the Thaali to the bride and welcomes her into his family. Before presenting these to the bride, they are blessed by the priest and are taken around in a tray to be blessed by the elders in the congregation.
The bride now leaves the Manavarai and retires to her bridal boudoir. She then returns to the Manavarai, dazzling in her gold braided Koorai, and garlands the groom expressing thus her consent and acceptance.
The crowning stage of the wedding is the Thaali ceremony. Thaali, a gold talisman with embossed sacred signs strung on a Kodi (a gold chain) is a cherished ornament a wife wears next to her heart while her husband lives.
To begin the Thaali ceremony, the priest calls for Gettimelam, Thavil accompanied by Nadhaswaram rising to a crescendo, to drown utterances for chatter of a house lizard that may spell Abha-sagunam or bad omen.
The groom stands and ties the Thaali-Kodi (Thaali - chain) around the bride's neck and with a finger spots her forehead
with Kungumam (vermillian dust) the red dot being called Kunguma-Pottu, another symbol of a married Hindu woman.
Simultaneously a shower of flowers blesses the couple. The priest holds high a lit oil lamp symbolizing the divine light witnessing the nuptial knot. Also now a coconut is cracked into two halves by a close member of the family symbolizing a bloodless sacrifice. The sweet coconut water signifying love, the white kernel purity and the broken shell selfishness shed.
The wedded couple now exchange garlands and the groom moves to accommodate the bride on his left, Shakthi's place beside Shiva and also the left half she is seen in the Ardhanareewara vadivam. They also feed each other a mouthful of elixir, a mix of fruit, milk and honey, as a promise of sweet and endless love they hope to share. From this point the bride becomes a Sahadharmini, an equal partner in the discharge of social duties and the attainment of their spiritual objectives.
Aseervaadham - Blessings,The priest first blesses the couple, showering them with rice, a symbol of happiness, prosperity and fertility, followed by the parents of the groom, the bride, their close relatives and the guests. The wedding ceremony ends with an Arathi as the newlyweds stand at the Manavarai.
Oonjal-swinging together when elders take drishti out of your aura and take aarathi too.
Virundh-upacharam - The Wedding Feast ,There is great rejoicing as a feast is spread to celebrate a momentous occasion.
Mute blessings flow from guests honoured and entertained with a Virundhu (breakfast.lunch/dinner) from a menu appealing to Aarusuvai (the six tastes) that the human palette is said to be able to clearly discern.
Shanthi Muhurtham-The copulation time specified by panchangam is calculated.So,that the offspring as per kula deivams blessings happens.Of course these days,such things are left to couples to decide.
sb