Happily divorced

[renuka]

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Only a very much loving wife can make the most bitter enemy.

There is no need to hate anyone actually...if people cant stand each other it is better to stop pretending and move on with life at least it gives a chance for both to be happy.

I have an aged patient some what my fathers age.

He is a Tamilian..he and his wife are separated but not legally divorced.
He takes pride to say that till this day he or his wife have never thought of going for a divorce cos they value marriage even though they are not staying together anymore.

I was thinking "what a nut case..if he values marriage so much why is he even separated to start with?"

But now I see him changing a little bit..when he talks to me or my nurse he tries to act like an elderly uncle sorts and tries hold our hands.

Then now he wants my handphone and my nurses handphone number too(We did not give him).

Now I know why he doesn't have to be divorced cos he is trying to make side connections!!LOL

 

[Raghy]

Sowbagyavathy Renuka, Greetings.

Then now he wants my handphone and my nurses handphone number too(We did not give him).

Doctor ponnu 'NO' sonnaa Nurse ponnaik kaadhali....... May be he is following 'Alwarpettai aallus' advice!

Cheers!

 

[kk4646]

There is no need to hate anyone actually...if people cant stand each other it is better to stop pretending and move on with life at least it gives a chance for both to be happy.

I have an aged patient some what my fathers age.

He is a Tamilian..he and his wife are separated but not legally divorced.
He takes pride to say that till this day he or his wife have never thought of going for a divorce cos they value marriage even though they are not staying together anymore.

I was thinking "what a nut case..if he values marriage so much why is he even separated to start with?"

But now I see him changing a little bit..when he talks to me or my nurse he tries to act like an elderly uncle sorts and tries hold our hands.

Then now he wants my handphone and my nurses handphone number too(We did not give him).

Now I know why he doesn't have to be divorced cos he is trying to make side connections!!LOL

Side Connection...? you mean chinnaveedu..? .. I have a doubt..if a person have an affair ..will it be called as chinnaveedu if he divorce the first one...?

TVK

 

[Raji Ram]

Oh, Renu! The 'chinna veedu syndrome' is changing as an infection!

Spreads to all the threads! :help:

 

[Raghy]

Side Connection...? you mean chinnaveedu..? .. I have a doubt..if a person have an affair ..will it be called as chinnaveedu if he divorce the first one...?

TVK

To my knowledge, Chinna veedu doesn't exist in the absence of Periya Veedu. What is the point? The thrill factor is gone! without his wife, any man is worth nothing. He could get 10 yiung girls later.. but none of them can become a chinna veedu. Only a periya veedu can validate a chinna veedu. no periya veedu; no chinna veedu! Looks like this forum needs lot of education about the rules of Chinna veedu!

Cheers!

 

[Raji Ram]

I have already told that I am lazy to log out every time!

This is my nap time and will give me a nice break!! :happy:

 

[Raghy]

Oh, Renu! The 'chinna veedu syndrome' is changing as an infection!

Spreads to all the threads! :help:

Sowbagyavathy Raji Ram, greetings.

Chinna veedu is the most glamorous topic discussed so far!

Cheers!

 

[kk4646]

To my knowledge, Chinna veedu doesn't exist in the absence of Periya Veedu. What is the point? The thrill factor is gone! without his wife, any man is worth nothing. He could get 10 yiung girls later.. but none of them can become a chinna veedu. Only a periya veedu can validate a chinna veedu. no periya veedu; no chinna veedu! Looks like this forum needs lot of education about the rules of Chinna veedu!

Cheers!

Who is the eligible teacher to frame these rules..? [ I am not Qualified..]

TVK

 

[renuka]

Side Connection...? you mean chinnaveedu..? .. I have a doubt..if a person have an affair ..will it be called as chinnaveedu if he divorce the first one...?

TVK

If he is a divorcee then his affair will be classified as Aadhi Gharwali!!(Paathi Periya Veedu)!LOL

 

[renuka]

Who is the eligible teacher to frame these rules..? [ I am not Qualified..]

TVK

Don't worry when ever there is a doubt a Guru will appear and remember this:

A Guru will appear with the Corrylium of knowledge to open your eyes previously blinded by the darkness of ignorance.
Upon that Guru I offer my salutations.

 

[Raghy]

Who is the eligible teacher to frame these rules..? [ I am not Qualified..]

TVK

Actually, Periya veedu is the one who decides the rules. Although the guy never disclose the information, periya veedu always knows about Chinnaa veedu; that's why she is periya veedu! If the chinna veedu is comparable and decent enough to be her counter part, then periya veedu would allow that and also direct the guy to treat both of them with respect. Chinna veedu is a periya vishayam sir!

Cheers!

 

[renuka]

Oh, Renu! The 'chinna veedu syndrome' is changing as an infection!

Spreads to all the threads! :help:

The virus is called Domicilium Brevis.

No known vector for transmission.

Currently only mode of transmission is by thoughts.

Treatment:
Over indulgence advised to build strong immune defense to subsequent attacks.

No known morbidity or mortality reported unless Domicilium Brevis comes in contact with Dormicilium Magnus.

In Latin

Domicilium=House
Brevis=Small
Magnus=Big

Domicilium Brevis=Chinna Veedu

Dormicilium Magnus=Periya Veedu

 

[sarang]

I believe rajesh kahnna did not divorce his wife dimple. He ditched anju mahendru to marry dimple after a whirlwind romance. Rajesh and dimple could not get on with each other after some time and went in separate ways. Anju claims that she forgot the past and made up with rajesh some years ago, and was holding his hands when he passed away (needs verification). A new actor, anita advani now claims that she was a live in companion of rajesh for the past eight years; a day before rajesh passed away she filed a petition wanting a share in the property and that she should not be evicted from his house. anita was not allowed to join the funeral and was forced to leave the house.

So, the chinna veedu originator lives happily till death building many cottages; chinna veedus suffer a lot after the man dies without making any provision. T.Janakiraman's novel krunji mul describes this sad affair.

Rajathi is very clever; she has made hers and daughter's financials secure; but political ambitions have taken the top slot as the basic pavlo's needs are more than met.

 

[Raghy]

Sakala Kala Doctor, Greetings.

Treatment:
Over indulgence advised to build strong immune defense to subsequent attacks.

Come on, this sounds like my treatment plan! Often I prescribe this treatment plan!

Cheers!

 

[suraju06]

Dear Raghy,

You have said:

No. There should not be a seperation or divorce. Our mutual requirements keep changing. We should learn to keep up with our mutual requirements. I was going to type an example, but stopped; I don't want this message becoming too personal. But it would be suffice to say, we have to observe each others requirements and make them happen. If we can't observe, then we can openly ask. I don't see anything wrong with that. When one of the partners expect their desire to be fulfilled without even their asking, trouble starts.

Between a husband and wife even some of the desires are attended to without asking. As you say it is true that requirements keep changing. But "understanding" has to remain constant and for ever. Moreover, it is not reasonable to expect that each desire will be fulfilled each time it arises. This is where the tolerance comes into the picture. If a spouse is to take the extreme step of divorce because the desires did not get fulfilled what is the other option? A new relationship may not come with a guarantee that the desires will always be attended to promptly. Then for the divorced single, the life becomes a boring soliloquy in a single Act play they wake up to every day. The pity is that the individual is the actor, director and audience too. It is a miserable existence.

 

[suraju06]

Dear Renuka,

Treatment:
Over indulgence advised to build strong immune defense to subsequent attacks.

No known morbidity or mortality reported unless Domicilium Brevis comes in contact with Dormicilium Magnus.

You left out the symptoms. Why?

 

[renuka]

Dear Renuka,


You left out the symptoms. Why?

LOL!! You want to get me banned from forum??

 

[renuka]

Ok here is a major symptom;

Once bitten by this Virus the person is never shy!!

 

[Raghy]

Dear Raghy,

You have said:


Between a husband and wife even some of the desires are attended to without asking. As you say it is true that requirements keep changing. But "understanding" has to remain constant and for ever. Moreover, it is not reasonable to expect that each desire will be fulfilled each time it arises. This is where the tolerance comes into the picture. If a spouse is to take the extreme step of divorce because the desires did not get fulfilled what is the other option? A new relationship may not come with a guarantee that the desires will always be attended to promptly. Then for the divorced single, the life becomes a boring soliloquy in a single Act play they wake up to every day. The pity is that the individual is the actor, director and audience too. It is a miserable existence.

Sri. Raju, Greetings.

I agree with you. That's why I am not favouring seperation or divorce situations. That's why I second Sowbagyavathy Renuka's idea of annual assessment. every year we can look at our relationship and actually find ways and means to improve it. Requirements are not the issue; when one of the spouse expects the other spouse to act just by understanding without the need for asking, trouble starts. There should be an open communication. If I like to have it, I would openly ask. we developed some 'pari bashais'; I would ask right in front of everyone, none the wiser so far. Thats what i mean. Sometimes we are not that tuned to our spouse's expectations; in those times, open communication helps a lot. In extreme situations, when we find each other with few short falls, it would not be a bad idea to reeducate ourselves in the art of loving and caring.

For example, if a person is not competent to look after an elderly person, then he/she can get educated about that. nothing wrong with that. exactly same thing applies to spouses too.

Cheers!

 

[Raghy]

Ok here is a major symptom;

Once bitten by this Virus the person is never shy!!

முழுக்க முழுக்க நனைந்தப்புரம் முக்காடு எதுக்கு? ( After becoming completely wet, why bother to cover the head?)

Cheers!

 

[S.Ramanathan]

vaazvadhaal

 

[tks]

I have some questions about this whole 'Chinna Veedu' business.

Does anyone know personally anyone who is lives in a Chinna Veedu - I assume it is a woman who lives in a Chinna Veedu (I cannot imagine woman maintaining a Chinna Veedu for a man - at least not in India. Of course anything is possible).

How much does it cost the man to maintain a Chinna Veedu these days? Why do these women agree to such an arrangement.
I guess a man keeping Chinna Veedu must expect complete loyalty and trusting relationship from the one who lives in his Chinna Veedu? LoL

Anyway I am not sure how long this term is in use. I heard the usage only about 7 or 8 years ago while visiting Chennai and talking to a Auto Rickshaw fellow who was telling me about someone maintaining a Chinna Veedu..

 

[renuka]

I have some questions about this whole 'Chinna Veedu' business.

Does anyone know personally anyone who is lives in a Chinna Veedu - I assume it is a woman who lives in a Chinna Veedu (I cannot imagine woman maintaining a Chinna Veedu for a man - at least not in India. Of course anything is possible).

How much does it cost the man to maintain a Chinna Veedu these days? Why do these women agree to such an arrangement.
I guess a man keeping Chinna Veedu must expect complete loyalty and trusting relationship from the one who lives in his Chinna Veedu? LoL

Anyway I am not sure how long this term is in use. I heard the usage only about 7 or 8 years ago while visiting Chennai and talking to a Auto Rickshaw fellow who was telling me about someone maintaining a Chinna Veedu..

Good questions:

1)Chinna Veedu is NOT a woman who lives in a small house.
She is a woman who provides a SMALL OPPORTUNITY for man to have some fun on the side.

2)Cost of Chinna Veedu out here is a sports car,condominium,monthly allowance,overseas holidays,designer clothes,diamonds,jewels and business contracts and opportunities.

3)Some woman want this sort of agreement becos it is less of a commitment.
Being a wife is a full time job.
Chinna Veedus out here feel let a wife do all the work and help a man reach his full potential in terms of money and then Chinna Veedus just walk over and enjoy the fruits of action and hard work of the Periya Veedu.

4)Most men think their Chinna Veedus should be loyal to them.
But for a Chinna Veedu..she has no legal compulsion to be loyal.
So if a man is looking for loyalty he is better off having a Canine.

 

[ShivKC]

How much does it cost the man to maintain a Chinna Veedu these days? .

<edited. plz refrain from posting things that cannot be substatianed by proof. Even if it is public knowledge we live in a country where concrete evidence is required and especially against political people. why unnecessarily get into a legal trouble.>

now, how much it costs to maintain such chinnaveedu's? Answer? one's entire earnings and legacy!

 

[renuka]

Then for the divorced single, the life becomes a boring soliloquy in a single Act play they wake up to every day. The pity is that the individual is the actor, director and audience too. It is a miserable existence.

Being Divorced is not being single all over again.
Divorcees are quite busy with work,educating their children and looking into their finance and well being.

Mostly live with their children or family and life goes on as usual.

Some divorcees might wake up alone daily but that is no big deal finally.

None of us married individuals are going to be sharing a bed forever with our spouses.

One day one of us are going to go first..so the Home Alone feeling is bound to come one day..it's just that some are Home Alone much earlier than others.

I feel divorcees have more responsibility than single unmarried individuals.
A divorcee still has to work hard to maintain himself/herself and the kids.

On the other hand for an unmarried person once his/her parents have kicked the bucket he/she is practically alone and since there are no dependents life can be not too taxing financially.

Most unmarried individuals are quite well adjusted these days.
They are happy and life goes on as usual.
Some have no regrets that they are not married.