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X Rated Thread

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Renu,

this is a joke my friend sent me.. I thought it would be interesting for this particular thread.. :)


Subject:
Confusion confounded ...!!!!


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Three priests were in a railroad station on their way home to Pittsburgh . Behind the ticket counter was a very sexy, shapely, well endowed woman wearing a very tight, skimpy halter top. She made the three priests very nervous, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets.

The first priest approached the window. 'Young lady, I would like three pickets to titsburg.' He completely lost his composure and fled.

The second priest goes to the window. 'Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nipples and dimes.' Mortified, he too fled.

'Morons....'the third priest mutters and moves to the window. 'Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And, if you insist on dressing like that, when you get to the pearly gates, St. Finger's going to shake his Peter at you.'


They took the bus!!!























=========================================



































 
Dear Subhalakshmi Ji,

You know many years ago I had attended a case where this lady was non stop telling me about her dissatisfied sex life with her husband.
She and him dont get along and fight like cats and dogs but still expect some magic in bed.

I advised her saying when you dont see eye to eye in life do not expect any magic to happen in bed becos after all the brain is the greatest sexual organ.

So try to improve your relationship with him.
She came back many times saying no improvement and I was getting kind of fed up also cos they were always fighting as usual.

One day I told her "Ok do this..you fantasize about having it with someone else and tell him to fantasize about someone else and see how that works"

She was shocked like hell and told me "Doc what you saying? Aiyoo how can I do that? Kallanalum Kanavan Pullanalum Purushan"

I never heard her complaining again..I wonder whether she decided to mend ties with her hubby or decided to fantasize about someone else.


 
Dear Subhalakshmi Ji,

You know many years ago I had attended a case where this lady was non stop telling me about her dissatisfied sex life with her husband.
She and him dont get along and fight like cats and dogs but still expect some magic in bed.

I advised her saying when you dont see eye to eye in life do not expect any magic to happen in bed becos after all the brain is the greatest sexual organ.

So try to improve your relationship with him.
She came back many times saying no improvement and I was getting kind of fed up also cos they were always fighting as usual.

One day I told her "Ok do this..you fantasize about having it with someone else and tell him to fantasize about someone else and see how that works"

She was shocked like hell and told me "Doc what you saying? Aiyoo how can I do that? Kallanalum Kanavan Pullanalum Purushan"

I never heard her complaining again..I wonder whether she decided to mend ties with her hubby or decided to fantasize about someone else.



Hahahahahaaa!!! Renu, that was the best.. I fully agree with you.. it is all in the mind no doubt about it.. if a couple fight they grow apart, so easily and no way magic is going to happen.. but I think she was so afraid to ask you a question again, or she must have heeded your advice, but not telling you.. :D
 
Renu darling, this is a nice song, never heard it and unique way to paint the body and the wall.. I have seen something else like this.. neat.. :)
 
Renu darling, this is a nice song, never heard it and unique way to paint the body and the wall.. I have seen something else like this.. neat.. :)

Even I only heard it today cos a friend sent it to be by email.
So I was thinking the first few seconds of the video might make a few hearts beat faster and make people wonder whats this video is all about.!!LOL

I have been neglecting the X rated thread for a long time cos I was too caught up in Maya thread.
After all Maya is still classified under X Files cos no one us know Maya so I thought "what the heck..let me visit my X rated thread"
 
hahahahahaa!!! are you on FB???

I used to be but I deleted my account.Cos I started getting too many dumb messages from jerks I dont even know who even say things like "If at all your husband divorces you let me know cos I will be there available"

And this jerks were from some religious pages I was in.So never trust the "holy" types Ok.

Then one person invited me to comment on his religious book and then when I started contributing as he required he sent me an email saying "you will make the sales of my book drop cos you seem to be well informed and he told me he wanted to be the centre of attraction for people to treat him as a guru"
So I knew what he meant..he wanted me out of his page.

I was thinking what an idiot!! He invites me and then expects me to be dumb and then asks me to leave..and he is some 70 years Ok..still wants fame!!

So I thought better leave FB cos either I get messages that people want to marry me or some religious nerd expects me to know less than him.
 
I used to be but I deleted my account.Cos I started getting too many dumb messages from jerks I dont even know who even say things like "If at all your husband divorces you let me know cos I will be there available"

And this jerks were from some religious pages I was in.So never trust the "holy" types Ok.

Then one person invited me to comment on his religious book and then when I started contributing as he required he sent me an email saying "you will make the sales of my book drop cos you seem to be well informed and he told me he wanted to be the centre of attraction for people to treat him as a guru"
So I knew what he meant..he wanted me out of his page.

I was thinking what an idiot!! He invites me and then expects me to be dumb and then asks me to leave..and he is some 70 years Ok..still wants fame!!

So I thought better leave FB cos either I get messages that people want to marry me or some religious nerd expects me to know less than him.


Yeah, these so called holy are all unholy to the core, I don't prescribe to anything like that.. I only trust a very few.. I don't go for any religious stuff, only if it sounds philosophical and spiritual I comment or share, I can't believe the stuff you had to go through.. I just have only my friends see me for others I am off limits.. I understand..
 
OK Mrs. Renu ... you asked for it!

This video is X-tremely X! Enjoy
Sesame Street - This is the letter X! - YouTube
:-D


So Shankara Ji...ha ha ha ha..
Many are going to rush to see this video and get a K**D.
Dont ask me what the ** stands for..its a Punjabi word.
You are a good boy I see you know Classic Tamizh too.
Once you done with Classic Tamil then may be you can be introduced to Punjabi Terminologies of the "unholy" kind!!LOL

Till then be good...
 
I want to know whether mexico salavaikari joke by sujata is rated x or not? (still I do not know the joke)
 
I got a message from this thread with Mrs. Visa and Renu's reply, I guess it was erased, but it was funny enough to make me laugh out loud.. :)
 
I feel left out of the joke now!

Anyway there is nothing "X-rated" about sex and if you want to have the best you can there are three simple things that must happen. #1) Take care of yourself and love yourself because if you do not this is where your insecurities will eat you alive. #2) Do not be selfish.... Ever. You get what you give. Karma lives EVERYWHERE! #3) Listen listen listen. Even if your partner isn't saying anything that alone is saying A LOT.

Have fun out there Yogins! The greatest asset you have in life is your partner and indulging together is your right as a couple!
 
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I feel left out of the joke now!

Anyway there is nothing "X-rated" about sex and if you want to have the best you can there are three simple things that must happen. #1) Take care of yourself and love yourself because if you do not this is where your insecurities will eat you alive. #2) Do not be selfish.... Ever. You get what you give. Karma lives EVERYWHERE! #3) Listen listen listen. Even if your partner isn't saying anything that alone is saying A LOT.

Have fun out there Yogins! The greatest asset you have in life is your partner and indulging together is your right as a couple!


I fully agree with what you wrote.
 
If we try to hide more and more the curiosity will be more and more. Be open and discuss will solve all the problems.
 
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