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Imbalanced Criticism of India by those who left India , NRI, PIO, OCI ....

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Dear Bro Nara Ji,

I spent almost 3 years in Chennai as an expat, for my company from 1999 til 2002. The company gave me a nice apartment and a car.

While I had a personal tragedy, I did enjoy reconnecting with my relatives and friends after 30 years in the US. My children got to visit and as a family we all got to see India. It was also a very challenging work assignment.

While I got frustrated on a few things, especially people jumping queues and the like, I generally enjoyed my stay and had very lively and thought provoking discussions about life in India versus USA, with a lot of friends. Made a few more friends.

Regards,
KRS
 
"Mother Land" Rhetoric: Please Do What You Preach...! Stay there for good.

Dear Ravi:

Delighted to get a response from you.. I should have included UAE, Malaysia etc... My views given in bold letters below:


Shri Yamaka,

Though I don't belong to the list of people you are addressing to, kindly allow me to experess my views.


One may go away from one's parents to another states in India or out of India itself, for better prospects, that can help the person and his/her parents.

This need not necessarily lead one to criticize, degrade, defame, hate, contempt their own parents just because the parental environment was not conducive to the person to better his/her prospects.

Here I am afraid you'r confused with your parents with the usage of "Motherland" and "Fatherland" by some of the jingoistic Nationalists here. No one here "degrade, defame, hate, contempt their own parents".

Similarly the emotional attachement to one's own home country, where the person has taken birth, grew up and experienced many things in his/her life, breathing the air, playing on the grounds, drenching in rains, swimming in the ponds/lakes, listening to the stories of History that has instilled the sense of patriotism, glory of the nation, unity & solidarity of the nation, the vivid cultures that still leads to unity in diversity etc..etc makes a major emotional impact on a person. Just leaving this place/country which one has cherished, for the sake of betterment, need not necessarily makes one look down upon one's motherland.

The memories you are talking about will always be there for me, you and most others... "Nenjam Marapathillai".

My only gripe is those who froth about their "Motherland" every second of every minute are far away w/o smelling the smell of the soil for too long... they say "It's all for making some money and having some comfort"... Therefore, I conclude that their intense feeling for "Motherland" is terribly phony... and is secondary only to "the money and comfort" gained in the alien land...

As I have said many times, I read and be up to date about what's happening in TN and India, and have written "What made me happy and unhappy?" etc. I have remitted plenty of money when my parents, sister and brother were alive... and now they have departed...

The day I gave up my Indian Citizenship (in 1989) I have become a Naturalized American. I just can't have the "Indianess" in me any more, the same way I had prior to my Naturalization.

I just "can't have the cake and eat it too"... I don't have "double-forked tongue" to give a "double talk".

Having gone away from one's own country, one may look down upon one's own parents or own country and call the tem "Motherland" as nothing but stupid jingoism and sentimental idiotism. One may consider the term "Motherland" as of great value and revere it with love, passion and respect.

I am only pointing out that those who are foaming the lingo of "Motherland" to act and get back to that land and live in peace and harmony! I ask "Where's the Action?"

Words are cheap... Please do what you preach... Stay in the "Motherland" and enjoy!

The farmer types of the people are those for whom their "motherland" doesn't makes any sense because his/her motherland was useless.

The later types of the people are those for whom their "motherland" has contributed a lot right from their birth and have instilled many of the great senses/values that they still relish.

Thus both types of the people still dwell in America/Canada/UK/Australia as naturalized citizens or green card holders.

Peace, dear Ravi. :)
 
Dear Bro Nara Ji,


While I got frustrated on a few things, especially people jumping queues and the like, KRS

Such precise points are helpful for the readers (both who are criticising India and who are appreciating present day India) to close their differences, Sri KRSji.

I remember standing in the Q for morning milk, ration provisions, kerosene, railway concession forms, railway tickets, gas booking, follow up for gas cylinder delivery (so that the gas delivery chap does not go away to deliver to someone else on premium), palm oil, vanaspathi ghee (called "Dalda") etc. etc. I am listing out only those waiting-in-line of duration of 1 hour or more. So one or two guys jumping the queue hardly mattered to an average Indian, it was just an addition of 5 minutes. Quarrelling with the guy and getting thrown out of the line meant additional queueing in for one hour or more. Our base or foundation of expectation was/is low.

So when I need not have to stand in queue for any of the above mentioned things, it is a spectacular achievement for me.

Regards,
 
Now what if the adopted country has a "Push back the Desis!" movement like the "Mumbai for the Mumbaikars!" ? What if they resume racial discrimination against the brownies and start dotbusting the ragheads? Will we (the NRIs) fight back saying, no we are as American, British, Australian, Malaysian, Arab as the rest of you are? Or will we think, no matter what, worst comes to worst, we can always go back to India?
 
For me, in 1982 (3 years after entering US on J-1 Visa) I talked with my wife about going back and settling in India (in Madurai, Trichy or Chennai)...

She looked at me in some wonderment and asked,"Are you crazy? My family - all Religious Supremacists - will kill you for what we did! You always forget that we have an IRM and you are an Atheist! And, you want to raise our kids in a Secular Household! Forget it, Y. Just apply for Green Card.. and we are becoming US Citizens ASAP... India is not for people like us!"

Not questioning your immigration decision at all, but did you really fear an honor killing? By the TB community of all?

Just out of curiosity I dug out this list of prominent Hindu-Muslim marriages: Hindu-Muslim marriages | Facebook

Seems to have been ok without honor killings.
 
Now what if the adopted country has a "Push back the Desis!" movement like the "Mumbai for the Mumbaikars!" ? What if they resume racial discrimination against the brownies and start dotbusting the ragheads? Will we (the NRIs) fight back saying, no we are as American, British, Australian, Malaysian, Arab as the rest of you are? Or will we think, no matter what, worst comes to worst, we can always go back to India?
Dear biswa, I agree with what you are saying in principle, but it needs a little more precision I think. The dot-busters of NJ and ragheads, etc., are (i) not that widespread and (ii) not state policy. This is not to minimize the agony of the experience of the victims.

But it is far more dangerous when the state itself targets a particular ethnic or religious group for special scrutiny and surveillance. The recent revelations of widespread and indiscriminate spying by New York City Police Department has sent a chill down the spine of all Muslims in the U.S. Further, the U.S. congress passed a bill and Obama signed it into law that anyone suspected of supporting terrorism directly or indirectly, without any further due process of the law, the ironically named Justice Department can throw the person into indefinite administrative detention.

One may think well I am a Hindu so why should I care. But to the FBI a Hindu looks no different from a Muslim.

These are precarious times. The scenario you are raising is not farfetched and is far more serious than the instances you cited.

Cheers!
 
Not questioning your immigration decision at all, but did you really fear an honor killing? By the TB community of all?

Just out of curiosity I dug out this list of prominent Hindu-Muslim marriages: Hindu-Muslim marriages | Facebook

Seems to have been ok without honor killings.

Actually, whether you believe or not, I NEVER worried about my life.. I NEVER thought "honor killing" will happen to me or my wife:

In general, I have very nice feelings and opinions about TBs since my days in Madura College - a TB college. I never thought the TBs are involved in any "honor killing" at all in the South. But things may be different in the North.

1. After a brief period of our marriage, my wife was accepted by MY family as "a sweet and smart" girl.

I took her to my village and everything was just fine and happy. In fact, she voluntarily covered her head with the saree end (as many Hindu women do in the North, like Mrs. Indira Gandhi). My folks were extremely happy that she did it , even though she has not "converted" to Islam nor changed her name. In fact, most people liked her name, not knowing the meaning of it! Lol. :)

2. But, the experience was quite different from her side, even today! She had to put up with very rough time "inside the family" who were all even talking about, "Nama Subbutta - A Senior Police Officer in Chennai at that time - solli enconter-la poda vaikraen paru"... this is what she was referring to me "they will kill you", which is IMPOSSIBLE to carry out, IMO!

She even very sternly has warned them saying, "He is an upstanding Asst Prof in a major University in TN. If you people think of hurting him in any way at all - including encounter etc. - I will see that you all go to jail for a long long time. I will go to India's Supreme Court and the President of India.. Ithu Sathiyam... I warn you" :)

3. Knowing what she had done to me and my family, I am willing to do ANYTHING that she wants, and to keep her happy and comfortable - If tomorrow she wants me to take an Early Retirement to go and settle in India, I will very gladly do it..no question will be asked.

And, I myself never worried about my physical safety any where in India or the US.

We are quite comfortable and happy here, and will not go anywhere!

Cheers.

:)
 
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....3. Knowing what she had done to me and my family, I am willing to do ANYTHING that she wants, and to keep her happy and comfortable - If tomorrow she wants me to take an Early Retirement to go and settle in India, I will very gladly do it..no question will be asked.
Y, this is what true love is all about, my congratulations to you and to your dear wife for finding each other.

Your case is an inter-religious one, with the girl being TB and the boy Muslim, the widest possible social separation LOL. But the reaction from the TB side is no less lamentable even when the distance is as close as it can be. My niece from my wife side, a lovely IT professional, married an upper caste NB, next only to Brahmins in the jAti order. Her in-laws side accepted her, though there was some apprehension in the beginning. But, her parents, no no, never, to the extent it is causing severe unhappiness for the poor sweet girl. Is caste more important than the welfare and happiness of your own girl?? I just don't get it.

Anyway, my congratulations to you and to your dear wife. It is lovely that you have shared the story of your entire family with us, not many of us would dare unsheathe so much.

Cheers!
 
Dear Bro Nara Ji,

Yes, I think that God has blessed Sri Yamaka in many ways, including the DESTINY (statistically based or not) of meeting the right lady from of course the great town in TN that produces great people :)

You seem to have been no slouch either in this regard, based on brief bits of kimono opening on your life, you have allowed.

I have seen many inter religious marriages (including mine) - there is no single pattern. I don't want folks to get the implication from your posting, that somehow our community is the only obdurate one with respect to such alliances. I have seen others equally display such a behavior.

If one closely looks at the cause for such a behavior, it is usually the image one wants to keep up in one's community (what will they say?), economics and status, fear of the family reputation being sullied, especially if there are other siblings yet to be married, religion and culture to be followed by the progeny, assumed sense of betrayal, especially towards the daughters etc, etc.

In my own case, my in laws never treated me well, especially the mother, even though they were not particularly orthodox. But my wife never once yielded, protecting me from any unpleasantness always.

Regards,
KRS
 
Actually, whether you believe or not, I NEVER worried about my life.. I NEVER thought "honor killing" will happen to me or my wife:In general, I have very nice feelings and opinions about TBs since my days in Madura College - a TB college. I never thought the TBs are involved in any "honor killing" at all in the South. But things may be different in the North.1. After a brief period of our marriage, my wife was accepted by MY family as "a sweet and smart" girl.I took her to my village and everything was just fine and happy. In fact, she voluntarily covered her head with the saree end (as many Hindu women do in the North, like Mrs. Indira Gandhi). My folks were extremely happy that she did it , even though she has not "converted" to Islam nor changed her name. In fact, most people liked her name, not knowing the meaning of it! Lol. :)2. But, the experience was quite different from her side, even today! She had to put up with very rough time "inside the family" who were all even talking about, "Nama Subbutta - A Senior Police Officer in Chennai at that time - solli enconter-la poda vaikraen paru"... this is what she was referring to me "they will kill you", which is IMPOSSIBLE to carry out, IMO!She even very sternly has warned them saying, "He is an upstanding Asst Prof in a major University in TN. If you people think of hurting him in any way at all - including encounter etc. - I will see that you all go to jail for a long long time. I will go to India's Supreme Court and the President of India.. Ithu Sathiyam... I warn you" :)3. Knowing what she had done to me and my family, I am willing to do ANYTHING that she wants, and to keep her happy and comfortable - If tomorrow she wants me to take an Early Retirement to go and settle in India, I will very gladly do it..no question will be asked.And, I myself never worried about my physical safety any where in India or the US. We are quite comfortable and happy here, and will not go anywhere!Cheers.:)
Dr Y Avl -It seems you identify yourself as an American Citizen - Do you say pledge of Allegiance along with others when it is recited? Do you pay respect to the symbol of American nation - its flag. The behavior expected is :"When the flag is passing in a parade or review or is being hoisted or lowered, all persons should face the flag, stand at attention, and salute. Those in uniform should render the military salute. Men not in uniform should remove the hat with the right hand and hold the hat at the left shoulder, the hand being over the heart. Men without hats and women should place the right hand over the heart. Aliens should stand at attention. A viewer should salute the flag in a parade at the moment it passes him." Quote from :How do you show respect to the United States FlagHow about your reaction to an Indian flag?I am only talking about behavior ..
 
Dr Y Avl -It seems you identify yourself as an American Citizen - Do you say pledge of Allegiance along with others when it is recited? Do you pay respect to the symbol of American nation - its flag. The behavior expected is :"When the flag is passing in a parade or review or is being hoisted or lowered, all persons should face the flag, stand at attention, and salute. Those in uniform should render the military salute. Men not in uniform should remove the hat with the right hand and hold the hat at the left shoulder, the hand being over the heart. Men without hats and women should place the right hand over the heart. Aliens should stand at attention. A viewer should salute the flag in a parade at the moment it passes him." Quote from :How do you show respect to the United States FlagHow about your reaction to an Indian flag?I am only talking about behavior ..
hi tks sir,
if y is USA citizen....he has to obey the word in US dollar...IT CLEARLY SAYS THAT....IN GOD WE TRUST....but he says he is not
having trust in God....this is against toi his country,,,i e USA...
 
Happened in other countries; no guarantee that it will not happen in US. A trigger at the opportune moment can change history.

Some european countries, UK and US have started asserting 'christian values'.

Now what if the adopted country has a "Push back the Desis!" movement like the "Mumbai for the Mumbaikars!" ? What if they resume racial discrimination against the brownies and start dotbusting the ragheads? Will we (the NRIs) fight back saying, no we are as American, British, Australian, Malaysian, Arab as the rest of you are? Or will we think, no matter what, worst comes to worst, we can always go back to India?
 
Y, this is what true love is all about, my congratulations to you and to your dear wife for finding each other.

Your case is an inter-religious one, with the girl being TB and the boy Muslim, the widest possible social separation LOL. But the reaction from the TB side is no less lamentable even when the distance is as close as it can be. My niece from my wife side, a lovely IT professional, married an upper caste NB, next only to Brahmins in the jAti order. Her in-laws side accepted her, though there was some apprehension in the beginning. But, her parents, no no, never, to the extent it is causing severe unhappiness for the poor sweet girl. Is caste more important than the welfare and happiness of your own girl?? I just don't get it.

Anyway, my congratulations to you and to your dear wife. It is lovely that you have shared the story of your entire family with us, not many of us would dare unsheathe so much.

Cheers!

Dear N:

Thanks for the nice words.

My dearest wife is a big inspiration to me, and we both mutually admire each other a lot: She claims that I have given her the confidence and "swagger" in life, which was lacking before she met me! Lol. :)

I used to be a very private person till my son turned 21. Suddenly, I felt that I have done all that was expected of me.. and I wanted to open up and share my experience.

And, the blogs came along... I started writing as a form of "Thirumbi Parkkiraen", hoping my life experience may be useful to some of the younger audience/readers.

Take care.

Cheers.

:)
 
Dr Y Avl -It seems you identify yourself as an American Citizen - Do you say pledge of Allegiance along with others when it is recited? Do you pay respect to the symbol of American nation - its flag. The behavior expected is :"When the flag is passing in a parade or review or is being hoisted or lowered, all persons should face the flag, stand at attention, and salute. Those in uniform should render the military salute. Men not in uniform should remove the hat with the right hand and hold the hat at the left shoulder, the hand being over the heart. Men without hats and women should place the right hand over the heart. Aliens should stand at attention. A viewer should salute the flag in a parade at the moment it passes him." Quote from :How do you show respect to the United States FlagHow about your reaction to an Indian flag?I am only talking about behavior ..

Dear Dr. tks Avl:

Yes, I do. Most of what you wrote.

I did the same thing for the Indian flag till I gave up voluntarily my Indian Citizenship in 1989.

Are you an Indian or a Naturalized US Citizen here? You need not answer this, if you don't want to.

Cheers.

:)
 
Dear Ravi:

Delighted to get a response from you.. I should have included UAE, Malaysia etc... My views given in bold letters below:

My only gripe is those who froth about their "Motherland" every second of every minute are far away w/o smelling the smell of the soil for too long... they say "It's all for making some money and having some comfort"... Therefore, I conclude that their intense feeling for "Motherland" is terribly phony... and is secondary only to "the money and comfort" gained in the alien land...

As I have said many times, I read and be up to date about what's happening in TN and India, and have written "What made me happy and unhappy?"






Peace, dear Ravi. :)


Shri Yamaka,

It is not that I could not grasp the import of your message, challenging the appropriateness of the value attached to the sense of "MOTHERLAND" by NRI's.

It would be nice if you could try to acknolwedge the significance and the sensibility to the values many NRI's showcase towards "MOTHERLAND".

Being away from the Motherland, an NRI develops strong liking towards his/her Motherland. He/she will allways be missing something valuable in his/her heart. The only thing is, such feelings remains concealed deep within one's heart that helps a person to sustain his/her Materialistic and Comfortable (easiness in day to day social affairs, escaping certain social stigma etc.etc.) living for onself and that of his/her family.

Off course, Ears can not listen to the noice echoing in the Motherland, Eyes can not see the beauty of the Motherland, Nose strills can not breath the air of the Motherland and smell it's soil, Legs can not walk on the soils of the Motherland, Actions can not be performed directly/personally for the sake of the Motherland and her people, BUT, the "Heart" with loads of emotions, wrapped under the sense of Love, Care, Respect and gratitude towards the Motherland remains in tact and closely attached with the essense of the Motherland.

It's all the deep rooted feelings that one holds within oneself in one's deep inner consciousness. It is just not mere memories of the bygone days of living in one's motherland.

Some may just hold on the memories as something that can never be ruled out of the Human Brains AND out of this Brain memory may tend to get to know the latest happening in India as NEWS to keep oneself updated.

For some, its not just memories in Human brain and not just about NEWS updates BUT more importantly the passionate feelings that their heart sustains. The feelings of the Heart are very much exclusive and strong with compassion that has nothing to do just with the memories of the Brain and the capabilities of the brain to understand the happenings in INDIA.



An NRI's Love towards his/her Motherland is emotional and can not be rational. Calling this emotional feelings as stupid jingoism and sentimental idiotism is not proper. As well questioning such NRI's as "then what are they doing here while having love and passion towards one's Motherland?" is nothing but an attempt to challenge them between "what they need for their personal life AND what they actually feel in their heart with the sense of respect and gratitude, as sons of the soil?". It is a wrong attempt to show that either these folks are hypocryte OR these folks are idiots. Personally, I have strong contempt against such questions that frowns upon human emotions, any sort of positive human emotions that one holds within oneself in true spirit.
 
Shri Yamaka,

It is not that I could not grasp the import of your message, challenging the appropriateness of the value attached to the sense of "MOTHERLAND" by NRI's.

It would be nice if you could try to acknolwedge the significance and the sensibility to the values many NRI's showcase towards "MOTHERLAND".

Being away from the Motherland, an NRI develops strong liking towards his/her Motherland. He/she will allways be missing something valuable in his/her heart. The only thing is, such feelings remains concealed deep within one's heart that helps a person to sustain his/her Materialistic and Comfortable (easiness in day to day social affairs, escaping certain social stigma etc.etc.) living for onself and that of his/her family.

Off course, Ears can not listen to the noice echoing in the Motherland, Eyes can not see the beauty of the Motherland, Nose strills can not breath the air of the Motherland and smell it's soil, Legs can not walk on the soils of the Motherland, Actions can not be performed directly/personally for the sake of the Motherland and her people, BUT, the "Heart" with loads of emotions, wrapped under the sense of Love, Care, Respect and gratitude towards the Motherland remains in tact and closely attached with the essense of the Motherland.

It's all the deep rooted feelings that one holds within oneself in one's deep inner consciousness. It is just not mere memories of the bygone days of living in one's motherland.

Some may just hold on the memories as something that can never be ruled out of the Human Brains AND out of this Brain memory may tend to get to know the latest happening in India as NEWS to keep oneself updated.

For some, its not just memories in Human brain and not just about NEWS updates BUT more importantly the passionate feelings that their heart sustains. The feelings of the Heart are very much exclusive and strong with compassion that has nothing to do just with the memories of the Brain and the capabilities of the brain to understand the happenings in INDIA.



An NRI's Love towards his/her Motherland is emotional and can not be rational. Calling this emotional feelings as stupid jingoism and sentimental idiotism is not proper. As well questioning such NRI's as "then what are they doing here while having love and passion towards one's Motherland?" is nothing but an attempt to challenge them between "what they need for their personal life AND what they actually feel in their heart with the sense of respect and gratitude, as sons of the soil?". It is a wrong attempt to show that either these folks are hypocryte OR these folks are idiots. Personally, I have strong contempt against such questions that frowns upon human emotions, any sort of positive human emotions that one holds within oneself in true spirit.

Hello Ravi:

I hear you.

I fully understand the emotional attachments of NRIs for the "Motherland".

Probably you know already that I feel that people can achieve what they really want in life by working hard at it, relentlessly. And, we should also KNOW for sure what we WANT in life... many times, there will be times we want ALL and we just can't give up anything in life, for the sake of something else. Then, we bring conflicts and confusion! :)

Priority matters. Here are some stories -

1. I met one gentleman (a TB) who worked for about 20 years in a town in UAE. I asked him about his political activities there. He immediately said, "We are all hired employees, on a work Visa - none of us here has any political life.. we just do our work, collect our wages/salaries. We save as much as we can, hoping one day we give up and get back to our Motherland... you just can't have everything in life... you prioritize and see what makes MORE sense than others. We give up an active political life (in India, as citizens) for the sake of a good pay check".

I liked his frankness and the sense of sacrificing some RIGHT in order to gain something else.

2. Music Maestro Illaya Raja has talked a lot about the Value of the Motherland... he is a true Nationalist who always wants to smell the "Soil" that he was born in.. he seldom spends time away from TN.. he visits his home town (Panaiyapuram in Theni District; here is a namesake of my village Panaikulam which is in Ramnad Dist! :)) often, I heard.

Whether or not he makes big money, IR will always remain in TN. That's the true heart of a uncompromising Nationalist.

3. Here when I read some posts of the NRIs, I get confused and I ask myself "What do these people really want in life?"

Money & Comfort in an alien land.... or smell the Soil of the Motherland ?

If they are willing to sacrifice, they can get what they REALLY want!

That's all I am saying here...

Yamaka got what he wanted: He has professional satisfaction, enough money and comfort AND all the political expression he enjoys...He is satisfied with the Sound & Sights of TN via internet and the news from the Hindu, T of I etc. etc.

He does not need any more! He is in full harmony with his NEEDS and WANTS!! Lol :)

I don't know why some Indian Nationalists want to find fault with him, anyway?

Cheers.

Peace, dear Ravi.

:)
 
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Hello Ravi:


Yamaka got what he wanted: He has professional satisfaction, enough money and comfort AND all the political expression he enjoys...He is satisfied with the Sound & Sights of TN via internet and the news from the Hindu, T of I etc. etc.

He does not need any more! He is in full harmony with his NEEDS and WANTS!! Lol :)

I don't know why some Indian Nationalists want to find fault with him, anyway?

Cheers.

Peace, dear Ravi.

:)

Shri Yamaka,

I don't think any Indian Nationalist wants to find fault with your way of life. You seem to be exagrating yourself to have your own imaginary feelings that people are envy of your courage and accomplishments. And this imaginary feelings seems to be must for you to pat your own back. LOL!!!

Shri Yamaka, I mean no offence. Just expressing what I feel by your posts, that constantly says that theist are envy of your courage and mental boldness (when infact they argue in support of God/Spirituality, in a debate), Nationalists are finding fault with you etc..etc.

It is just that you and may be few others laugh at NRI's who hold on to the values/feelings of Motherland. And few others are acknowledging such feelings and finding it sensible. And with this opposing views we are rebutting against each others opinions.


So, please understand that no one is jelous/envy of your professional satisfaction, Material accomplishments, accumulation of money, all levels of comfort, political and social freedoms and with your state of Full Harmony with all your Needs and Wants.


It is just that people who are opposing your views are just arguing here against your opinions/criticism, considering you just another member. It is just based on what you stand for and what your opinions are, irrespective of what you have accomplished and how are you enjoying your contented life.


If my opinions are different from yours and any one else, I would for sure express my views against yours and any one else, irrespective of how high are you/are they dwelling in thier life. Hope this is clear to you, atleast from my side.

 
Now what if the adopted country has a "Push back the Desis!" movement like the "Mumbai for the Mumbaikars!" ? What if they resume racial discrimination against the brownies and start dotbusting the ragheads? Will we (the NRIs) fight back saying, no we are as American, British, Australian, Malaysian, Arab as the rest of you are? Or will we think, no matter what, worst comes to worst, we can always go back to India?

Shri Biswa sir,

Only a few members in this Forum seem to be working to bring in their own version of utopia into this world. I can say definitely, with what little knowledge I have gained (second hand, of course, but very reliable) is that every small group of humans anywhere in this wide world has its own coordinates of reference and ideas such as "perfect egalitarianism, broadmindedness, absence of discrimination, etc., will remain even if a country falls into economic downturn", will rarely turn out to be true; this is because, all the above things are like superficial masks worn when the going is more than good and all these will evaporate in no time, once there is scarcity for essential goods or economic problems, imho.

In M'sia and the Arab countries even now the "locals" (Malays and Arabs resp.) are a previleged class and this is obvious in all walks of life there, except perhaps purchasing in the shopping malls!
 
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I know some person will take this personally, but it is not intended that way.

I am only talking about all PIO's. When you come out of India, you are an ambassador of India. People in foreign land believe in India you paint. Please try to paint as positive an image as you can. If you can not paint a good picture, do not claim your country of origin as India. It impacts all of us PIO who love India.

You might have personal vendetta against your parents, your inlaws, your state, or your country, vent you frustration in private. Because your personal vengeance you make our work that much more difficult.

When Morarji Desai came our to UK and publicly disclosed that he drinks his urine, it was very difficult for us PIO. Think before you write or say bad things about India
 
....You seem to have been no slouch either in this regard, based on brief bits of kimono opening on your life, you have allowed.
Or like the eye slit of a burqa :) !!

Mine is not a storied life like Y. I have been the beneficiary of fortuitous opportunities many times. I also can't claim I came to USA for anything more noble than the attraction of the almighty dollar. After many ups and some downs over the years for some undeserved reason I am very happy now, I am a contented man enjoying everything life has to offer the way I know how.

I have seen many inter religious marriages (including mine) - there is no single pattern. I don't want folks to get the implication from your posting, that somehow our community is the only obdurate one with respect to such alliances. I have seen others equally display such a behavior.
Of course, Brahmins are not the only ones to feel this way, many others do too. Generally speaking, families at a lower pecking order of caste seem to accept inter-caste marriages with higher ranking caste than the reverse. With Brahmin sitting on top of the hierarchy they have no other caste with whom they may acquiesce an inter-caste marriage somewhat readily, they may do so kicking and screaming -- figuratively speaking. Even sub-castes within the ranks of Brahmins is a problem as each sub-caste thinks they are at the top.

If one closely looks at the cause for such a behavior, it is usually the image one wants to keep up in one's community (what will they say?), economics and status, fear of the family reputation being sullied, especially if there are other siblings yet to be married, religion and culture to be followed by the progeny, assumed sense of betrayal, especially towards the daughters etc, etc.
Yes, all this is true. Take a look at this small video.

Cheers!
 
I know some person will take this personally, but it is not intended that way.

I am only talking about all PIO's. When you come out of India, you are an ambassador of India. People in foreign land believe in India you paint. Please try to paint as positive an image as you can. If you can not paint a good picture, do not claim your country of origin as India. It impacts all of us PIO who love India.

You might have personal vendetta against your parents, your inlaws, your state, or your country, vent you frustration in private. Because your personal vengeance you make our work that much more difficult.

When Morarji Desai came our to UK and publicly disclosed that he drinks his urine, it was very difficult for us PIO. Think before you write or say bad things about India


Morarji Desai revealed to the world what he has been doing... he was not making up any "urine story"! Why, then the PIOs found it very difficult, anyway?

This "PIOs are Ambassadors" of India is a propaganda story..:)

I will say Be truthful and very honest... that will take the PIOs a long way.

Do your duty right, and be kind to your neighbors, fellow workers and others. Just be yourself, not wearing a facade of some type.

Shed the hypocrisy... and show your true wisdom.

Everything will take care of itself. That's what Yamaka does everyday!

All respect will come to the PIOs automatically!

:)
 
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Dear Bro Nara Ji,

You said:
Of course, Brahmins are not the only ones to feel this way, many others do too. Generally speaking, families at a lower pecking order of caste seem to accept inter-caste marriages with higher ranking caste than the reverse. With Brahmin sitting on top of the hierarchy they have no other caste with whom they may acquiesce an inter-caste marriage somewhat readily, they may do so kicking and screaming -- figuratively speaking. Even sub-castes within the ranks of Brahmins is a problem as each sub-caste thinks they are at the top.

Knowing that you implied just this, I have posted my opinion above. I used to see the resistance to inter caste marriages based on caste hierarchy, highly skewed towards the non acceptance from the Brahminical side long time ago. This has changed as long back in the late 1990s, as far as I know.

When I was in Chennai, within my work force, I saw several inter marriages, be it caste or religion of Brahmin boys/girls. Some of the most vehement opposition came from the so called lower castes, than even from other religions. It seemed to me at that time that times were changing.

Of course this is anecdotal, and I ask fellow members to verify this.

Regards,
KRS
 
"Mine is not a storied life like Y" - Nara post 122

Dear N:

"Storied"??!!! :)

I was just running away from all the demons chasing me!! Lol.

Cheers.

:)

 
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