Thali is tamil culture. All brahmins should emigrate from TN and gradually shed tamil culture. Hold on only to the core. And, be careful about brahmins from deep south. Be careful whether they are really brahmins or some other caste claiming to be brahmins.
Silapthikaram says" mamudu Parpon marai vazhi kaadidia .." Kovanlan married Kannaki. The original thali was to make others know that the girl is married along with metti in her leg finger. Tmails never had Tali, just exchanged garland and it was called Kalavu manam - girl chooses her hubby etc.
Brahman emigrates only when harrased, other wise they stay put giving excuses. With denial of Govt. jobs, The thief Adancing Society has driven most out of TN. I had visited about 40 villages with some of my other caste members and most have no Brahmans or good hotel to eat. Big cities still have old time believers and their daughters rather will marry a local guy - any OBC caste but not SC/ST. Tali was the financial safety for emergency, but now due to chain pulling is not necessary.
In ancient India every one was considered a manual laborar (Dalit) and educaion elevated them. Poonul - upa - nayanam - another knoweldge eye - was performed to elevate the boy to a student level. Besides Brahmans others were also allowed - you can see that in AAsari, Kollar, etc. So, only through deep knowlege one was elevated to Brahman state, which is not true now even in so called Brahman families. Being poor, sudy and dedicate your services to society and beg only in five houses were the Brahman's wa of life. Who wants that now or can live like that? So, those who study(not memorize and pass, rather develope skill sets and inductive reasoning move out of TN. Kerala, Carnatka, Andhra has minimum problems.
Now the question is, if one wants to wed in the Brahminal tradition, who should give Tirumangalyam etc?
The answer is boys side as a gift to the girl welcoming to their family as a "Vara Laxmi" . Should it be the custom even if the girl is from other castes? Yes, still she is a vara Laxmi and will be forced to learn and merge with the customs of the boy's house unless she is a IAS/IPS/... and other powerful employee.
