Well Lets jump over the nuisances a bit..
on with my story..
Sanja I dont know why I thought of her. But she was the only true crush in my life. Excepting of course the one in 8th std.. then in 9th.. then in XI std.. 3rd Sem of college... no wait.. where was I??
Sanja.. shes one of the best. Now, how did I meet her?.. I still remember it clearly, I had just landed in cincinnati and come to the university. I was staying with my friend from high school and looking for a parttime job. Since I got to the US late, I was unable to get any good parttime jobs. Everything was filled.
It was late in the evening, when my friend came to me and said.. "Dei, an am-ru Sanja called and left a message for you. She asked you to come to Siddall hall for interview and orientation. Its possibly a desk job. Good luck"
Thats when I learnt that am-ru stood for american. I was not really over the clouds with the news and took it normally. The next day, I went to Siddall. Siddall is one of the apartment complexes built for students to stay in i.e. one of many hostels. I went there at 10AM and was encountered with a crowded hall.
Having been in a village for the duration of my education, I had become extremely reticent - manly, villagish style. I thought thats what people respected.
Anyways, I approached the people present there one by one and asked them where I can find Sanja. Thats when I saw an african american woman and asked her the same questions. It looked like she had never come across an Indian guy before. She just stared at me and kept on staring at me. I know I was about the only person with a moustache.. probably in all of cincinnati... but she was over-doing her reactions.
Even as I was contemplating how to handle her stare, Sanja happened.
I was still staring back at the african american when Sanja kind of 'peeped' into my field of vision. It was like she was peeping into a window. You can see just her head and her upper body as if she was leaning in from the side. She had a big smile, a gap between her teeth like little 2-3 year old girls and she was bubbling with life.
'Hi ..'
thats what she said, before she moved sideways to come into my full view. The african american staring at me was suddenly pushed into the distant past.
'I am Sanja. I am the one who left you a message'
The word message was pronounced like 'messssaige' with a lot of enunciation -- just like a kid learning vocabulary.
She was beautiful.
It was like I was struck by lightning, I just stopped thinking or paying attention to anything else in the room. I could see only her... nothing else.
She was dressed unlike the other girls I had seen since coming to the us. She had what looked like a bigger version of 'Paavada Chokka'. The american girls usually wear dresses that accentuate their assets. But sanja was wearing a decent, modest dress.
Another thing was her liveliness, she was bubbling with enthusiasm and happiness. And she did not seem to notice that I was completely tuned out to what was happening around me and that I was staring at her with a blank expression.
Well, I realised I was staring but I could not do anything about it. Maybe it looked like I was listening to what she was saying to people around me but the truth was I could not hear a word she was saying.
I kept thinking ' She is sooooo beautiful..' Then I began to tell myself ' You just saw her.. its ok... calm down...' But I could not fight my inability to comprehend anything around me except Sanja.
After a few moments, I forced myself to snap out of it. But by the time, she was almost done talking to me. She was finishing up by saying " .. and thats about all you need to know about your work here. Come tomorrow at 10:30 AM to Calhoun Hall. We will look into your work timings there."
I did not want her to stop. I wanted to know more... more about her. I wanted to keep looking at her as she talked. That was really what I wanted.
She was starting to turn around when I quickly blurted out " How did you pick me for the job?" She stopped turning away and started to look towards me, with a kindergarden teacher's frown when she is about to reprimand a kid. Then, as quickly as it had appeared, the frown dispersed into a smile. "You had said in your application that you are an international student who wanted to make friends". Then she showed her teeth.
Its a very american thing. This showing of teeth by girls when they are happy or have been praised.
Unfortunately for Sanja, she had the small gap between her two front teeth. This feature, well, disturbed the smile. Whats worse was that.. I found this later.. that she smiled at every other nice thing you said to her
).
When she keeps quiet, she would look almost like preeti zinta.
I later learnt that she was also like me, in her first year of Master's Degree immediately after completing her BE in Electrical Engineering. She was working at the housing because she had already been in Univ of Cincinnati for 4 years of her bachelors degree.
We had a lot more interactions after this. Eventually, I even worked up the courage to comment on her looks now and then.
Everytime I told her that she looked beautiful, she'd immediately fall silent, look directly at me and alternate between a full smile showing the gap between her teeth and tightly closing her mouth as if she were angry.
It was as if she was trying to decide if I was poking fun at her or if I really meant my compliment. After a few moments of this, she would say,
" You're lyyyyying....".
I would then reiterate with all sincerity,
"No Sanja, you really look good today.".
To this, she would reply - thank you - with a slight jerk of her head before walking away with a big smile.
I really liked her. Maybe it was her childish attitude, or maybe it was her ebullience, or her naturally muted beauty. I don't know why. But I liked her. It was not like I wanted to kiss her but more like, I wanted to 'be' with her.
One day, I was just walking out of McMicken's Hall looking at the ground.. immersed in my own musings. I suddenly heard someone say 'Hi, Krishnan' as they walked past me in the opposite direction.
I did not catch who it was so I turned around to see who it was. Sanja was also looking back as she was walking away to check if I was looking back. she was showing the gap between her teeth.
Another day, I was reading Ken Follett's "Pillars of the earth". I did not even notice her before she pulled the book out my hands and without even looking at me started to inspect what it was that I was reading.
"I approve." She said, with the air of a spoilt princess, before handing me the book.
Then with the mock contempt shown by royalty, she proceeded to walk towards the elevator. At the elevator she turned around, showed the gap between her teeth and quickly got into it before the doors closed.
God, I loved her. Damn, she didn't know.
