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Divorce rearing its ugly head among Tambrahms

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The member who gave a
icon13.png
to my post in the quote, did NOT get the point! :sad:

I wrote this because respected Iyer Sir has taken 3 quotes of Jesus, to prove his point!

So, Jesus SEEMS to be the saviour! :spy:


Dear RR ji....i sing this song well.


JESUS SAVES

Jesus saves, tell the nations,
Tell it to your friends, everywhere
He will lead you,
as you trust and pray always
And declare that Jesus really saves.

Let not the cares
and joy of this wide world
Crowd out the Christ in you,
Let Jesus be the centre of your life,
And let Him shine through you.

Jesus saves, tell the nations,
Tell it to your friends, everywhere
He will lead you,
as you trust and pray always
And declare that Jesus really saves.

Wherever Jesus calls
that you should go,
Don't linger anymore,
Speak out the love
that conquered even death
And lives for evermore.

Jesus saves, tell the nations,
Tell it to your friends, everywhere
He will lead you,
as you trust and pray always
And declare that Jesus really saves.
 
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Dear Ganesh,
Don't you think this thread you started has served MORE than its purpose?? :ranger:

Yes Madam!!
It has deviated its course!!
I had started this thread so that members can post their experiences!! Other than Raji Madam others have not shared their real experiences!! If the rest can share theirs too there will be learning for the Community, I hope!!
 
Posts... :)

My mistake !
Dear Auh Ji,

I was analyzing why such mistakes happen. Got it!! By reading such words constantly used by some others! :ranger:

'Tension'' and ''Assault'' are two more such words.

Many don't say, 'nAn tensed-A irukkEn' but say, 'nAn tension-A irukkEn';

'avan assault-a sollittAn' to mention a casual comment by 'avan'! :D
 
Dear Ganesh,

Yes, we can wait for some more episodes by members.

These are NOT a divorces but wrong decisions by tambrahm parents, in my extended family.

1. Girl was nearing 30 and mom was frantically searching for horoscope match; she got the BEST match after two years!

Boy was about to get his green card and was well placed in New York. After a few skype talks, girl agreed to 'see' the boy.

She went to the U S of A, along with her mom and approved the boy, who is just one year elder to her. They were sluggish.

Wedding was planned for a date nearly 8 months later! Meanwhile, the boy GOT his green card! Wedding happened too.

Green card holders can not take the spouse with them to the U S of A, as the H 1 B visa holders do. The girl is stuck in India.

2. Another doctorate boy is born in the U S of A and hence a citizen. He married a relative girl from Trivandrum in 2011. Still

he is unable to take his wife along with him because his mother's visa records have some issues to be set right! :sad:

So, the enthusiastic parents, who want to send their daughter abroad should be very very careful.
 
Wonder whether the objector to Jesus would prefer quotes from the Koran? Or the Shia Revival? Or the Bahai Bible? If so, we can rely on the self-radicalised quotes from of the Hadiths and decrying our shaashtraas and puranaas.

My point that words reveal the man (or woman) is totally missed.

S Narayanaswamy Iyer


Sir,

It is not the Bible or Quran that matters. It is the poster...the shooter that matters.

I think GOD will deal with them whether it is Rama or Jesus. I just read somewhere that if they persist, He will arrange that they will have to pay the penalty in such a way that they will realize that it is because of what they did to others.

Even getting a divorce may be due to Karma... though it is ugly..... perhaps may be will of the GOD.
 
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Sir,

It is not the Bible or Quran that matters. It is the poster...the shooter that matters.

I think GOD will deal with them whether it is Rama or Jesus. I just read somewhere that if they persist, He will arrange that they will have to pay the penalty in such a way that they will realize that it is because of what they did to others.

Even getting a divorce may be due to Karma... though it is ugly..... perhaps may be will of the GOD.

Well..you seem very Abrahamic in your understanding of Religion.

God does NOT reward or punish.
We have Karma for that and its just karmic debt and experiences..if we like the outcome we call it reward.

If we dislike the outcome we call it a punishment.

God is an eternal witness.

He takes NO sides contrary to popular believe that those who think they are good feel God is on their side.

God is equal to all..its our actions that determines our experiences in life.

The Hindu concept of God does not condemn anyone to eternal fires of hell unlike Abrahamic religions.

In Hinduism if one experiences a hellish like state uts becos he/ she bought a ticket to there due to own actions or inactions.

But in some part of Hinduism..some came up with a bailing out bribing system of Pitr Karyams !
 
Dear Ganesh,

Yes, we can wait for some more episodes by members.

These are NOT a divorces but wrong decisions by tambrahm parents, in my extended family.

1. Girl was nearing 30 and mom was frantically searching for horoscope match; she got the BEST match after two years!

Boy was about to get his green card and was well placed in New York. After a few skype talks, girl agreed to 'see' the boy.

She went to the U S of A, along with her mom and approved the boy, who is just one year elder to her. They were sluggish.

Wedding was planned for a date nearly 8 months later! Meanwhile, the boy GOT his green card! Wedding happened too.

Green card holders can not take the spouse with them to the U S of A, as the H 1 B visa holders do. The girl is stuck in India.

2. Another doctorate boy is born in the U S of A and hence a citizen. He married a relative girl from Trivandrum in 2011. Still

he is unable to take his wife along with him because his mother's visa records have some issues to be set right! :sad:

So, the enthusiastic parents, who want to send their daughter abroad should be very very careful.

That US Citizen or Green card holder cannot take his newly married wife along is news to me...It is a good suggestion indeed!!
 
Well..you seem very Abrahamic in your understanding of Religion.


For me being an Abrahamic or Islamic does not matter..

What does that matter is being a theist..

This may also bring a laugh to members who always like to laugh even for matters which requires thinking....

OMG forgive them....:)

It may be your understanding...

I believe in what Buddha says ...he said :

The Karma of Divorce Depends on Motivation

In regards to your question whether divorce is negative karma or not, that depends on your motivation. Even though in teachings mentioned by Buddha it says divorce is heavy karma with the person who you married, whether it is negative karma or virtuous karma and whether the result is happiness still depends on your motivation. If being with that person blocks your ability to benefit sentient beings, then that would be an obstacle to your freedom to benefit others. For that reason, the marriage would not be the best way to benefit others, or your husband. If divorce is done with wisdom and compassion, then it can become virtue, even though it may be unpleasant for the person.

Read more at: https://www.lamayeshe.com/advice/karma-divorce-depends-motivation


 
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Originally Posted by Falcon

"When there is a contrary view, try to present them with erudition and with more sugar coating.... "

Dear Sri Falcon


Mikka nanri. I truly treasure your wise words to tiptoe through the tulips, to make no waves, to be diplomatic, to tread on no dangerous ground, and to sugar-coat my pills. Kindly advise, as a new guru, how to sugar-coat the following:-

My kula-deivam is Ambaal Sri Bhagavathi.

In two posts on this thread I praised four scriptures extolling my kula-deivam, i.e. -

(1) Saundarya Lahari by jagadguru Sree Aadi Shankaraachaariar;
(2) Devi Maahaathmyam from Maarkandeya Puraanam;
(3) Lalitha Sahasra-naamam from Brahmaanda Puraanam, and
(4) Kaali Sahasra-naamam from Devi Puraanam.

Both posts were deleted simultaneously with a single slash of the mighty machete.

Your esteemed recipe for sugar-coating the above will be most welcome.

Namaskaarams, guru!

S Narayanaswamy Iyer
 
Dear Sri Jai Shankar

"I believe in what Buddha says ...he said :

"The Karma of Divorce Depends on Motivation"

Sometimes the modern-age samskaaram of Divorce has nothing to do with the merits or demerits of either of the couple, or their respective motivations.

In "love" marriages, sorry in LUVVOOO couplings, pure animal mating instinct triumphs over tradition, prudence, long-term realities, feelings of parents and values and standards of the community. When the "love" flounders in the harshness of post-marriage, post-honeymoon living together, the differences emerge, multiply, enlarge, are exacerbated by well-meaning friends and relatives. Counselling and mediation is counter-productive.

"I could have married someone else. In fact I SHOULD have married someone else" is the silently chanted manthra. Roving eyes meet other pairs of roving eyes. Divorce, re-marriage, post-wedding shock of re-discovery, separation, divorce -- the whole cycle repeats itself. Till the person or persons involved opt for no-marriage co-habitation, as under the common law and just satisfy their physical needs, without tedious encumbrances.

Children! What children? Each accuses the other of secret liaisons if not outright adultery. Of hankering after former girl-friends, former boy-friends.

In this New Age of supervening LUVVOOO it is a wonder that the marriage ceremony does not include a "single talak" in some form as a necessary ingredient.

S Narayanaswamy Iyer
 
Dear Sri Jai Shankar

"I believe in what Buddha says ...he said :

"The Karma of Divorce Depends on Motivation"

Sometimes the modern-age samskaaram of Divorce has nothing to do with the merits or demerits of either of the couple, or their respective motivations.

In "love" marriages, sorry in LUVVOOO couplings, pure animal mating instinct triumphs over tradition, prudence, long-term realities, feelings of parents and values and standards of the community. When the "love" flounders in the harshness of post-marriage, post-honeymoon living together, the differences emerge, multiply, enlarge, are exacerbated by well-meaning friends and relatives. Counselling and mediation is counter-productive.

"I could have married someone else. In fact I SHOULD have married someone else" is the silently chanted manthra. Roving eyes meet other pairs of roving eyes. Divorce, re-marriage, post-wedding shock of re-discovery, separation, divorce -- the whole cycle repeats itself. Till the person or persons involved opt for no-marriage co-habitation, as under the common law and just satisfy their physical needs, without tedious encumbrances.

Children! What children? Each accuses the other of secret liaisons if not outright adultery. Of hankering after former girl-friends, former boy-friends.

In this New Age of supervening LUVVOOO it is a wonder that the marriage ceremony does not include a "single talak" in some form as a necessary ingredient.

S Narayanaswamy Iyer

Lovvu is totally fine.

In fact most of our Hindu gods had LOVVU marriage.

Only Lord Rama had a semi arranged marriage and it ended in divorce.

Lord Shiva had Lovvu and boy is He such a good husband.

For Vishnu it was LOVVU at first sight..He saw Lakshmi and He married her.

Lord Krishna also LOVVU..in fact He took away Rukmini cos she sent him Prema Patra and only loved Him.

Lord Muruga..both Lovvu marriages.

No horoscope matchings too.

Shantanu..Lovvu at first sight with Sathyvathi.

So lovvvu rules.
 
That US Citizen or Green card holder cannot take his newly married wife along is news to me...It is a good suggestion indeed!!
Dear Ganesh,

Ram and I forced our son to get married before he got his G C.

Since it is logical, he agreed. :)
 
jAdikku Eththa moodi; guruvukku Eththa sishyan!! :hail:

Dear RR ji..

The Guru had another Guru in Forum.
He was well trained and then launched attack on own Guru!LOL

But I am sure he will say to uphold dharma he opposed his Guru!
 
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Dear RR ji..

The Guru had another Guru in Forum.
He was well trained and then launched attack on own Guru!LOL

But I am sure he will say to uphold dharma he opposed his Guru!


The Forum need not necessarily have only one Jaadi and one moodi (with two female members cajoling each other all the time in other words FORUM MITRAS).

Perhaps Forum may deserve more...LOL

It is my Guru's earnest desire that I should overcome his/her challenges thrown upon me.

I am striving hard but in the process I slide down the ladder which I love to do.

BTW தீட்டின மரத்திலே கூர் பார்க்கிறது தப்பில்லையே....??
 
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The one whose :Cry: is LOUD when a thread derails, actually ENJOYS derailing it more and more and more! :bump2:

P.S: I expect Copy Cat Syndrome to flash again!
 
backtotopic.gif~c200


And those who habitually derail the threads and pass the buck conveniently on others are free to continue their lamenting...without any break.
 
Each thread eventually gets DIVORCED from Original topic.

May be we all should strive to remain Faithful to the topic and arrange our thoughts so that we stay commited to the topic instead of straying from the main discussion so that no ugly head of any kind surfaces.

Its a challenge to stay commited respecting the bond of the topic.

Its so easy to fall out of LOVVU with the topic and land in Talaq Talaq Talaq.

But.thank God we have Narayana Bhagawan and Shankara Bhagawan to help us stay marrried to the topic.
 
This is what the starter of this thread, Ganesh, says:

....It has deviated its course!! I had started this thread so that members can post their experiences!!

Other than Raji Madam others have not shared their real experiences!!
If the rest can share theirs too there will be

learning for the Community, I hope!!
 
Dear Vgane ji...
Its hard to share any experience about Divorce cos out here Hindus seldom land in divorce.

That way Indians in India divorce too easily.

Here country is too small..you can drive from North to South in 8 hrs..so word gets around..so everyone tries to behave.
 
Here is one more:

A handsome Iyengar doctor sees a pretty Iyer girl working at the airport. Gets her address and meets her parents.

Parents are elated and did not worry about horoscope matching etc. Wedding was a grand gAlA event. Girl went with

her hubby to the U S of A. She was not allowed to work and was forced to say at home. After two years, boy's family

started harassing the girl - remotely from India - for not begetting a child. Her husband too started torturing her. Then,

she approached her classmate girl and found a job as a librarian, to support herself. Applied for a divorce and got it.

She is NOT willing to re-marry or come back to India, because of the fear of gossips about her! How sad!! :(

Her father died soon and mom goes once a year to be with her daughter.
 
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