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  1. #61
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    Becky


    0 Not allowed!
    Two cannibals, a father and son, were elected by the tribe to go out and get something to eat. They walked deep into

    the jungle and waited by a path. Before long, along came this little old man. The son said, "OOh dad, there's one."

    "No," said the father. "There's not enough meat on that one to feed the dogs. We'll just wait."

    Well, a little while later, along came this really fat woman. The son said, "Hey dad, she's plenty big enough."

    "No," the father said. "We'd all die of a heart attack from the fat in that one. We'll just wait."

    About an hour later, here comes this absolutely gorgeous woman. The son said, "Now there's nothing wrong with

    that one dad. Let's eat her." "No," said the father. "We'll not eat her either."

    "Why not?" asked the son. "Because, we're going to take her back alive and eat your mother."

    Source: BabaMail
  2. #62
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    decision A nerd is a NERD!!


    0 Not allowed!
    Two nerdy male students meet on campus one day.

    One of them notices that the other is on a shiny new racing bike.

    He calls out to the other: "Hey -- nice bike! Where did you get it?"


    "Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young co-ed rides up on this bike.


    She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and says 'You can have ANYTHING you want!!'"


    "Good choice," says the first, "her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway."

    Source: BabaMail
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  4. #63
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    0 Not allowed!
    super
  5. All views expressed by the Members and Moderators here are that of the individuals only and do not reflect the official policy or view of the TamilBrahmins.com Website.
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  6. #64
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    Fear


    0 Not allowed!
    A teacher told her young class to ask their parents for a family story with a moral at the end of it and to return

    the next day to tell their stories.

    In the classroom the next day, Joe told his story first, "My dad is a farmer and we have chickens. One day we were

    taking lots of eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the truck when we hit a big bump in the road; the basket

    fell off the seat and all the eggs broke. The moral of the story is not to put all your eggs in one basket."

    "Very good," said the teacher.

    Next, Mary said, "We are farmers too. We had twenty eggs waiting to hatch, but when they did we only got ten chicks.

    The moral of this story is not to count your chickens before they're hatched."

    "Excellent!" said the teacher again, very pleased with the responses so far.

    Next, it was Barney's turn to tell his story: "My dad told me this story about my Aunt Karen ... Aunt Karen was a flight

    engineer in the war and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey,

    a machine gun, and a machete." "Go on," said the teacher, intrigued.

    "Aunt Karen drank the whiskey on the way down to prepare herself; then she landed right in the middle of a hundred

    enemy soldiers. She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets. Then she killed twenty more

    with the machete till the blade broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."

    "Good heavens," said the horrified teacher. "What did your father say was the moral of that frightening story?"

    "Stay away from Aunt Karen when she's drunk."

    Source: BabaMail
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  8. #65
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    Becky


    0 Not allowed!

    A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.

    After the initial embarrassment, they both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower.

    In the middle of the night, the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but

    I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket?"

    The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye, says, "I have a better idea, just for tonight, let's make

    pretend that we're married."

    "OK! AWESOME!" the man says happily.

    "GOOD... get your own darn blanket!" came the reply.

    Source: BabaMail
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  10. #66
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    Victorious


    0 Not allowed!

    A fire started on some grasslands near a farm.
    The county fire department was called to put out the fire. The

    fire was more than the county fire department could handle.
    Someone suggested that a nearby volunteer bunch

    be called.
    Despite some doubt that the volunteer outfit would be of any assistance, the call was made.

    The volunteers arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They rumbled straight towards the fire, drove right into

    the middle of the flames and stopped!
    The firemen jumped off the truck and frantically started spraying water

    in all directions.
    Soon they had snuffed out the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two easily-controlled

    parts.
    Watching all this, the farmer was so impressed with the volunteer fire department's work and was so grateful

    that his farm had been spared, that right there on the spot he presented the volunteers with a check for $1,000.

    A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds.


    "That ought to be obvious," he responded, wiping ashes off his coat.

    "The first thing we're gonna do is get the brakes fixed on our fire truck!"

    Source: BabaMail
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  12. #67
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    Question


    0 Not allowed!
    Nelson Mandela is sitting at home watching TV when he hears a knock at the door.

    When he opens it, he is confronted by a little Chinese man, clutching a clipboard and yelling, "You sign! You sign!"

    Behind him is an enormous truck full of car exhausts.
    Nelson is standing there in complete amazement, when the

    Chinese man starts to yell louder, "You sign! You sign!"


    Nelson says to him, "Look mate, you've obviously got the wrong bloke. Please leave", and shuts the door in his face.

    The next day he hears a knock at the door again. When he opens it the little Chinese man is back with a huge truck

    of brake pads. He thrusts his clipboard under Nelson's nose, yelling, "You sign! You sign!"
    Mr. Mandela is getting

    a bit annoyed by now, so he shoves the little Chinese man back, shouting: "Look, push off ! You've got the wrong bloke!

    I don't want them!" Then he slams the door in his face again.


    The following day, Nelson is resting, and late in the afternoon, he hears a knock on the door again. On opening the door,

    the same man is standing there thrusting a clipboard under his nose, shouting "You sign! You sign!" Behind him are two

    very large trucks full of car parts.
    This time Nelson loses his temper completely, he picks up the little man by his shirt

    front and yells at him; "Look, I don't want these! Do you understand? You must have the wrong name! Who do you want

    to give these to?"
    The little Chinese man looks at him very puzzled, consults his clipboard, and says:

    "You not Nissan Maindealer?"

    Source: BabaMail
  13. All views expressed by the Members and Moderators here are that of the individuals only and do not reflect the official policy or view of the TamilBrahmins.com Website.
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