Woes of Brahmin Widower

[mkrishna100]

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Mr.Krish

You are talking about Advertisement response and I am talking about real people with whom I move and interact with and they completed their Engineering and well employed and one also Completed from Oxford UK . They are all just depressed and unwilling to take part in any family functions as they feel awkward standing alone and hence refuse to come to any functions . Not that those married are doing great in the family but these unmarried women are full of depression and two of them quit their jobs unable to handle and the rest are not knowing what to do and they are now venturing into spirituality .

 

[tbs]

Mr.Krish

You are talking about Advertisement response and I am talking about real people with whom I move and interact with and they completed their Engineering and well employed and one also Completed from Oxford UK . They are all just depressed and unwilling to take part in any family functions as they feel awkward standing alone and hence refuse to come to any functions . Not that those married are doing great in the family but these unmarried women are full of depression and two of them quit their jobs unable to handle and the rest are not knowing what to do and they are now venturing into spirituality .

hi

generally these highly educated ppl will join some ASHRAM and ruin their later life...they end up with SAAMIYAAR group too...they

are neither benefit to the family nor to the society...

 

[krish44]

Mr.Krish

You are talking about Advertisement response and I am talking about real people with whom I move and interact with and they completed their Engineering and well employed and one also Completed from Oxford UK . They are all just depressed and unwilling to take part in any family functions as they feel awkward standing alone and hence refuse to come to any functions . Not that those married are doing great in the family but these unmarried women are full of depression and two of them quit their jobs unable to handle and the rest are not knowing what to do and they are now venturing into spirituality .

Well educated and decently employed career women try avoiding family functions as they do not relate to those attending the function. Married Women talk about their

Children and inlaws [how good or bad they are].These drive single carer women away.Many try to probe them as to why they are not married.So functions become a torture

for the single women.Our brahmin society simply cannot fulfill the emotional needs of these single women.Most think that marriage is the only objective in life. There is

good life outside of marriage.Many of these women get out of the country -mostly europe or the US or down under to escape from this torture from kith and kin.They

become anonymous and explore freely what life has to offer. They find relationships without constraints of caste or religion based on their hobbies and interests and look

forward to a better life which india cannot offer.

 

[biswa]

So members are discussing depression caused by not getting married.

But what about depression due to getting married?

Is the answer second marriage?

 

[krish44]

So members are discussing depression caused by not getting married.

But what about depression due to getting married?

Is the answer second marriage?

Many get into extra marital relationships.

They would like to have their cake and eat it too.

They want to get out of depression .

These women do not want to get out of marriage.

They just would like to explore other avenues and find satisfaction in fleeting relationships .

It can be total boredom tied with responsibilities and house work and husband with predictable habits.

 

[tbs]

So members are discussing depression caused by not getting married.

But what about depression due to getting married?

Is the answer second marriage?

hi

any way depression is gurantee in life....its side product of getting married /not married....if we have extra marital affairs....

then depression increases..lol

 

[krish44]

Man is polygamous by nature and tends to experiment with more women if not satisfied with wife and is depressed.Many times this relationship outside marriage improves the

existing married life.He realises that the new relationship with another woman without commitments is the best he can hope for.He can always return to his present wife after

a fling. Some women also try to find a companion if fed up with husband . It is not that they do not love their husbands. They feel he cannot fulfill all their desires and need

and require to supplement it outside thru another relationship. They would not like to separate from husband as he provides financial security . No one wants a broken

marriage. Most carry on putting up with minor transgressions and move on in life.Most working women spend more time in exacting jobs and spend lot more time in job

involving close interactions with their male colleagues. If they find a level of comfort with those men they work with and share their lunches they do get attracted and

attached to them. At work level they bond and become the best of friends.

 

[Nagala]

Though old thread, wanted to respond since my daughter is genuinely interested if there is someone like this, a widower with small kid maybe. We are Tamil Iyers.
She is a divorcee, of an unconsummated marriage and was not very keen until now in another marriage as she needed time. She is willing to marry, in case it works out to be mutually supportive and someone likeminded is looking for.
More details can be exchanged in case there is a genuine profile that she is willing to work out. Thanks !

 

[krish44]

Though old thread, wanted to respond since my daughter is genuinely interested if there is someone like this, a widower with small kid maybe. We are Tamil Iyers.
She is a divorcee, of an unconsummated marriage and was not very keen until now in another marriage as she needed time. She is willing to marry, in case it works out to be mutually supportive and someone likeminded is looking for.
More details can be exchanged in case there is a genuine profile that she is willing to work out. Thanks !

Nagala ji

You do not know the worth of your own daughter.

Brahmin men are not getting brahmin women singe or divorced for marriage.

Your daughter can hope and get a good match -single unmarried or divorced or widowed.

Unfortunate that the first marriage did not work out.

As a first step , you can float her profile in the Bridegroom wanted section of this forum. You will get many

responses.You might be surprised.

Best of luck

 

[Supganesh2016]

Brahmin widowers are having a tough time finding matches -widows or divorced.If they happen to have a child then they are doomed.

No brahmin girl would like to bring up the child .

Nor they would like to support mother/father of the widower.

As it is brahmin girls are choosy about their mates.What is the way out for these widowers?

I find other communities little more reasonable.

Recently after looking for a match for a brahmin widower around 38years, found a well educated employed girl 30plus -divorced within a month of marriage-

innocent divorcee who offered to marry him and accept his child and mother.

Do brahmin girls accept the new realities of changed society and stop setting wild terms for a life time relationship?

Brahmin boys are increasingly looking to other communities for matches.

They are far more liberal and open minded.

I have started feeling that being a boy with brahmin tag is an albatros around his neck .

Similarly another brahmin boy -son of a friend ended up with a broken engagement with a brahmin girl

.A NB girl an old classmate of the boy very well off simply married him.

All these come as a relief for brahmin boys/men who are seeing the patriarchal order getting crumbled around them and these mummy's boys are stuck without

matches.

We have to thank a social reformer who changed the order in tamilnadu and new age feminists who find brahmin girls as dedicated followers.

Brahmin males have to think of foreign countries where caste tags do not matter much.There is no future for them in tamilnadu

It depends on the individual. There are divorcee or widow somen who's willing to get married to a good character divorcee or widower.

 

[krish44]

This thread is old.
What happened in this case was an educated divorced working girl whose first marriage had lasted one month offerd to marry him and bring up his child as her own She is from. intermediate caste. She with brahmin husband brought up the kid to college level. They intend having their own child only after marriage of daughter