• Welcome to Tamil Brahmins forums.

    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our Free Brahmin Community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

    If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact contact us.

The Quandary of Tamil Brahmin Bride Shortages!

Mani_Chennai

Active member
In one of the Harikathakalashepam, the Bhagavathar ssonnathu:

Brahmans love Tamil. If you look at the clan relationship, every relationship starts with “a”gara like a musical notes – appaa, ammaa, akkaa, ambi(thambi) anngachchi(thanngachchi), aththai, atthimber, annaa, but Taattaa is Thaattaa because if it is ‘aathtaa’ it will mean mother etc. அப்பா,அம்மா,அக்கா,அம்பி,அங்கச்சி,அண்ணா,அத்தை,அத்திம்பேர்.. Though hilarious, is it not true?. Ambi is like Ambaal)! So, he said, I call any good person as Ambi.
 

Mani_Chennai

Active member
In defense of Ambis - What is so wrong with being an ambi - That is how nerds were treated in High schools cliques. I consider calling some one as Ambi is offensive -
It is perfectly alright to be different from the general norm. One generation might suffer - But this too will pass. Ambis and Nerds of the world unite.
In one of the Harikathakalashepam, the Bhagavathar ssonnathu:

Brahmans love Tamil. If you look at the clan relationship, every relationship starts with “a”gara like a musical notes – appaa, ammaa, akkaa, ambi(thambi) anngachchi(thanngachchi), aththai, atthimber, annaa, but Taattaa is Thaattaa because if it is ‘aathtaa’ it will mean mother etc. அப்பா,அம்மா,அக்கா,அம்பி,அங்கச்சி,அண்ணா,அத்தை,அத்திம்பேர்.. Though hilarious, is it not true?. Ambi is like Ambaal)! So, he said, I call any good person as Ambi.
 

sravna

Well-known member
To be a Remo you need the capabilities of Ambi and Anniyan. To attract and protect which is what Remo does you need to possess the destructiveness of Anniyan and the childlike innocence of Ambi.

The best Remo is Lord Krishna
 

prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
To be a Remo you need the capabilities of Ambi and Anniyan. To attract and protect which is what Remo does you need to possess the destructiveness of Anniyan and the childlike innocence of Ambi.

The best Remo is Lord Krishna
There were many Krishna's depending on the storyteller.
There were many misrepresentations too.

The Krishna stealing gopies cloth was not the same, Krishna giving Gita Upadesh. Which Krishna is Remo?
 

sravna

Well-known member
There were many Krishna's depending on the storyteller.
There were many misrepresentations too.

The Krishna stealing gopies cloth was not the same, Krishna giving Gita Upadesh. Which Krishna is Remo?
Prasad

That's the beauty of Krishna's character. He can be different things to different people. To be a protector you need to be the best of all the worlds. Krishna's pranks came out of a pure heart. The same Krishna giving Gita upadesh shows the master of pragmatics at work.

He is complete and hence un circumscribed capabilities. So you may look at him in any way. There is always something to learn if you are open and perceptive.
 

prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
Prasad

That's the beauty of Krishna's character. He can be different things to different people. To be a protector you need to be the best of all the worlds. Krishna's pranks came out of a pure heart. The same Krishna giving Gita upadesh shows the master of pragmatics at work.

He is complete and hence un circumscribed capabilities. So you may look at him in any way. There is always something to learn if you are open and perceptive.
You live in mythology, others live in reality.
The op is pointing out that 70 years olds with 150 years old ideas are failing the community.
 

sravna

Well-known member
You live in mythology, others live in reality.
The op is pointing out that 70 years olds with 150 years old ideas are failing the community.
We make our reality. If mythology can help us shape the right ideals why not employ them. Ideas get better with the test of time. Modern ideas have to pass that test. If time tested ideas apparently fail we are just not being true to its spirit.
 

sravna

Well-known member
It is important not to get carried away by the idea of modernity. It makes sense with respect to technology and fashion. They don't survive time. But society's ideals on the contrary need to weather time and come out successfully. The longer it is practiced the better is the testimony for its value.

So it is necessary to have the right perspective in this modernity versus tradition debate.
 

prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
We make our reality. If mythology can help us shape the right ideals why not employ them. Ideas get better with the test of time. Modern ideas have to pass that test. If time tested ideas apparently fail we are just not being true to its spirit.
Your own example if a person marries 1008 wives (whatever the reason), will you advise your daughter to marry him?
It sounds great in mythology but in reality, it is unworkable. That is the reason our ancient culture is disappearing among young people. Then again you have shown in your post that you do not understand reality nor do you care about the younger generation's aspirations.
You live in your world, and rest be dammed.
I am sorry we do not agree at all.
 

sravna

Well-known member
Your own example if a person marries 1008 wives (whatever the reason), will you advise your daughter to marry him?
It sounds great in mythology but in reality, it is unworkable. That is the reason our ancient culture is disappearing among young people. Then again you have shown in your post that you do not understand reality nor do you care about the younger generation's aspirations.
You live in your world, and rest be dammed.
I am sorry we do not agree at all.
I would without hesitation ask my daughter to marry a person of Krishna's caliber irrespective of his 1008 wives I am sure she will be happy. That's what matters.

But personally I have Rama's attitude towards marriage. I don't want to pass judgement here as both Rama and Krishna are truly impeccable.

I understand reality and am really saddened that we are more into illusion of happiness than experiencing real happiness.

Younger generation needs guidance. But I am not advocating forcing of ideas either. As always balance works best.
 

Vaagmi

Well-known member
I quote “ you live in mythology and others live in reality”.
We loosely use words here. Krishna marrying a 1008 or more Gopis is mythology. Every mythological story has two aspects. One is just what is said and the other is what is implied. People who read the mythology just miss a lot of hidden underlying treasure. When Krishna married a thousand Gopis it was marriage of one male with a thousand females and also granting of Sayujya Samrajya to a thousand jeevatmas which have crossed the sAlokya,sArupya,sAmeepya stages and were yearning for sAyujyam.To understand the meaning of all these please read just not religion but also a little bit of philosophy too.
It is like calling the worship of Shivling as phallous worship. Indeed the Shivling looks like the phallous. It does not make the worship of Shivling phallous worship if you go a little deep and understand why Shivling is worshipped.
Sravana,
There is no use arguing with people who think with a borrowed language. If language conveys ideas then Shivling is just phallous.
I go. Bye.
 

sravna

Well-known member
I quote “ you live in mythology and others live in reality”.
We loosely use words here. Krishna marrying a 1008 or more Gopis is mythology. Every mythological story has two aspects. One is just what is said and the other is what is implied. People who read the mythology just miss a lot of hidden underlying treasure. When Krishna married a thousand Gopis it was marriage of one male with a thousand females and also granting of Sayujya Samrajya to a thousand jeevatmas which have crossed the sAlokya,sArupya,sAmeepya stages and were yearning for sAyujyam.To understand the meaning of all these please read just not religion but also a little bit of philosophy too.
It is like calling the worship of Shivling as phallous worship. Indeed the Shivling looks like the phallous. It does not make the worship of Shivling phallous worship if you go a little deep and understand why Shivling is worshipped.
Sravana,
There is no use arguing with people who think with a borrowed language. If language conveys ideas then Shivling is just phallous.
I go. Bye.
Well explained Sir
 

Lotusinsanskrit

Active member
Your own example if a person marries 1008 wives (whatever the reason), will you advise your daughter to marry him?
It sounds great in mythology but in reality, it is unworkable. That is the reason our ancient culture is disappearing among young people. Then again you have shown in your post that you do not understand reality nor do you care about the younger generation's aspirations.
You live in your world, and rest be dammed.
I am sorry we do not agree at all.
Lol 😆
the op is difficult in getting single bride but talking about a person marries 1008 wives.
 

renuka

Gold Member
Gold Member
I quote “ you live in mythology and others live in reality”.
We loosely use words here. Krishna marrying a 1008 or more Gopis is mythology. Every mythological story has two aspects. One is just what is said and the other is what is implied. People who read the mythology just miss a lot of hidden underlying treasure. When Krishna married a thousand Gopis it was marriage of one male with a thousand females and also granting of Sayujya Samrajya to a thousand jeevatmas which have crossed the sAlokya,sArupya,sAmeepya stages and were yearning for sAyujyam.To understand the meaning of all these please read just not religion but also a little bit of philosophy too.
It is like calling the worship of Shivling as phallous worship. Indeed the Shivling looks like the phallous. It does not make the worship of Shivling phallous worship if you go a little deep and understand why Shivling is worshipped.
Sravana,
There is no use arguing with people who think with a borrowed language. If language conveys ideas then Shivling is just phallous.
I go. Bye.
Long long ago in a galaxy far far away I read that the 16008 wives are symbolic.

8 is the 8 petals of the Hridaya chakra.

1000 is the petals of the Sahasrara Chakra and each chakra has 16 kalas hence 16000.

So 16000 + 8 = 16008.

Krishna represents the Lord of the Chakras as He is also known as Yogeshvara.

So its the state of Sayujyam when Krishna " marries" the 16008.

Btw the Shiva linga doesnt really look lke any organ.
Its a formless form, representing both the Manifest and Unmanifest.

Lingam meaning Leeyate Gamyate Iti Lingam( That into which everything undergoes dissolution)

So finally whether its 16008 " wives" or the Shivalingam..both denote the state of Dissolution either in a technical sense or in the state of Divine Love where the Bhakta merges with her Lord.

I am using the word her Lord here because all of us are created from Prakirti which is feminine..all fetuses are feminine first including male fetuses..the male fetus only becomes male when testosterone is secreted a bit later in utero.

Only God is the Masculine principle and we are the Feminine principle hence the term wives of Krishna is used.



note** Hridaya chakra is different from the 12 petalled Anahata chakra..in most text Anahata is wrongly translated as the heart chakra..Anahata is the unstruck sound chakra.
 
Last edited:

prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
I would without hesitation ask my daughter to marry a person of Krishna's caliber irrespective of his 1008 wives I am sure she will be happy. That's what matters.

But personally I have Rama's attitude towards marriage. I don't want to pass judgement here as both Rama and Krishna are truly impeccable.

I understand reality and am really saddened that we are more into illusion of happiness than experiencing real happiness.

Younger generation needs guidance. But I am not advocating forcing of ideas either. As always balance works best.
My point was that ideal changes. What was ideal at some point in times changes over a period, then some iXXXt comes along to DEFEND their ideal without understanding the context (occasional visitor).
Vishvamitra abandon Menaka and Child Shakuntala, which would not be an ideal parent material. No modern girl will want a person like that.

There is no need to jump through hoops. My statement is supporting the OP to stay that TB Boys need to change, so that the modern educated, carrier oriented, ambitious girls will find them marriage material.
 

Vaagmi

Well-known member
My point was that ideal changes. What was ideal at some point in times changes over a period, then some iXXXt comes along to DEFEND their ideal without understanding the context (occasional visitor).
Vishvamitra abandon Menaka and Child Shakuntala, which would not be an ideal parent material. No modern girl will want a person like that.

There is no need to jump through hoops. My statement is supporting the OP to stay that TB Boys need to change, so that the modern educated, carrier oriented, ambitious girls will find them marriage material.
I believe one of the qualities that would go to make a marriage material is say boldly whatever one wants to say. But indeed there are people with the name of a man but with guts at zero level. They make easily disownable abuses hiding it in junk like ixxxt. I wish they try to get some courage at least by borrowing it from their women folk. Poor chaps. God bless.
 

sravna

Well-known member
My point was that ideal changes. What was ideal at some point in times changes over a period, then some iXXXt comes along to DEFEND their ideal without understanding the context (occasional visitor).
Vishvamitra abandon Menaka and Child Shakuntala, which would not be an ideal parent material. No modern girl will want a person like that.

There is no need to jump through hoops. My statement is supporting the OP to stay that TB Boys need to change, so that the modern educated, carrier oriented, ambitious girls will find them marriage material.
Prasad,

The ideals that are espoused in our scriptures are universal and timeless. You can practice them at any time or place. Controlling ones emotions, respecting others and good self esteem etc are what are taught. They will stand you in good stead any time, any where. I would proudly defend them.
 

sravna

Well-known member
I have been very scathing in my words too. But I think they are appropriate reactions for gross misdeeds. If your defences are good it will protect self. But when the adharmic acts are pervasive and constant it goes beyond protection of self and the battle has to be fought.
 

Mani_Chennai

Active member
I believe one of the qualities that would go to make a marriage material is say boldly whatever one wants to say. But indeed there are people with the name of a man but with guts at zero level. They make easily disownable abuses hiding it in junk like ixxxt. I wish they try to get some courage at least by borrowing it from their women folk. Poor chaps. God bless.
It is claimed that about 4.5% people in the world are Narcissists. Thus, "with name of man" know how to hide their identity and no parents with daughters (includes them) with narcissist tendency are identified before marriage by visiting with a Psychiatrist( I am not their agent or am a Psychiatrist). Unhappy marriages are the result of incompatible narcissist with a simple minded partner. Indians (for that matter any nationality) will not change until we first identify the personality using sleuths and then proceed. But who has time? Bad mother-in-law/daughter-in-law syndrome should be first resolved, otherwise being unmarried is bliss. About 45% (in the West) do not want to marry or have children because without detailed analysis ( almost impossible ) you spent rest of the life like a caged tiger. This is true of not only so called Brahmans but also others in India. With economic freedom and some real education, women are now understanding that finding a compatible partner takes a long time, patience and some luck.
 

sravna

Well-known member
I think the problem is both the bride and the groom are expecting perfection from the other which invariably leads to disappointments. The Americans especially have found a way out by understanding humans as one who invariably have a number of weaknesses and have set to live accordingly.

I do not want that solution either. People in theory are indeed perfect and we need to bring out atleast some of it. I believe that's a better way out and can lead to helping to preserve the institution of marriage and other relationships in general.
 
Top
Thank you for visiting TamilBrahmins.com

You seem to have an Ad Blocker on.

We depend on advertising to keep our content free for you. Please consider whitelisting us in your ad blocker so that we can continue to provide the content you have come here to enjoy.

Alternatively, consider upgrading your account to enjoy an ad-free experience along with numerous other benefits. To upgrade your account, please visit the account upgrades page

You can also donate financially if you can. Please Click Here on how you can do that.

I've Disabled AdBlock    No Thanks