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Challenges in marrying an Iyengar girl

sharanadla

I_in_ghar
I am an NB soon to marry a TamBrahm girl. I am not sure if the marriage is going to be in the Iyengar traditional way or will it be a simple registered marriage. I am a little concerned too if it's the former. I have spoken about this with her as well, but she is also not very sure about the rituals in this case.

I am here to get an idea of how prepared I should be for the wedding. Is there anything I need to be well aware of and be prepared for?

Thanks in advance.
 
It is better to do registered marriage and perform a reception in a grand manner.

I am saying this by observing personally with two marriages one is like you, NB boy married an Iyer girl and another with Iyer boy married a girl.

First let me say the latter where the girl is happy with the costumes and other things as most of the rituals are with boy performing but the embarassment occurs with girls parents as they have not practiced the costumes and rituals of brahmin style

For the former it is really tough to do the rituals of Brahmin style by boys family and it is really an embarrassment for all.

If you feel some rituals to be followed it is better to follow Arya samaj or other Hindu marriage style which may be comfortable on both sides
 
The parents of the girl need to be open about it with the groom and his people , and it's always better to have a " heart to heart " with all ( bride and groom with both sets of parents - none else is really required !) - and decide, instead of just the youngsters making a decision ! After all both parents have agreed to an inter community marriage, isn't it ? This should avoid heartburn later.
 
Your wife should be the best complement and vice versa. Someone who complements has the same goals but different means is my belief. In the current times that is best achieved with in the same caste, religion and nation in order of preference. When people become broad minded enough all the inter marriages are fine.
 
The parents of the girl need to be open about it with the groom and his people , and it's always better to have a " heart to heart " with all ( bride and groom with both sets of parents - none else is really required !) - and decide, instead of just the youngsters making a decision ! After all both parents have agreed to an inter community marriage, isn't it ? This should avoid heartburn later.
There is no guarantee that there will not be heartburn. Heartburn is expected and will happen. But I agree that agreeing parents must be included, with a strict Timeline.
 

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