Can someone advice me about how to change the Gothram

[ns_sridhar77]

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Hi Iam Sridhar from Chennai. Recently married. We got married in a temple and not in the traditional way.

I now want to know how to change the gothram of my wife to my gothram.

Is there some thing of this sort or by literally marring her, changes her gothram to mine ?

Can you please help me in this matter with your proper advice and guidance ?

Regards,

Sridhar.
Email: [email protected]

 

[vignesh2014]

There is no need to change kothram.it will automatically get changed

 

[prasad1]

Wife accept the husband's gotheram along with lot of other things.

 

[tbs]

hi

once marriage over...whether temple or court/ traditional.........gothram automatically changed.....

 

[biswa]

Wife accept the husband's gotheram along with lot of other things.

Prasadji, nowadays the acceptance goes the other way too. For "other things" if not gothram.

 

[biswa]

hi

once marriage over...whether temple or court/ traditional.........gothram automatically changed.....

It is automagically transferred.

What if the wife wants to keep her original gothram and occasionally uses it as required? Also if a non-Hindu woman marries a Hindu man, can she also claim his gothram?

 

[renuka]

It is automagically transferred.

What if the wife wants to keep her original gothram and occasionally uses it as required? Also if a non-Hindu woman marries a Hindu man, can she also claim his gothram?

What about Chinna Veedus(2nd wives and so on)? Do they get a Gotra change too?

What about the case of a divorcee? When she divorces her husband..does she get back her original Gotra? and what is she remarries? Does she take up the new husband's Gotra?

Complicated right?

 

[krish44]

It is automagically transferred.

What if the wife wants to keep her original gothram and occasionally uses it as required? Also if a non-Hindu woman marries a Hindu man, can she also claim his gothram?

I think too much is being made of gothram . my brother in law an iyengar has given his gothram to his christian wife. another relation an iyengar has given her gothram to her christian husband for some house warming rituals. who is to object to it anyway.?

 

[krish44]

What about Chinna Veedus(2nd wives and so on)? Do they get a Gotra change too?

What about the case of a divorcee? When she divorces her husband..does she get back her original Gotra? and what is she remarries? Does she take up the new husband's Gotra?

Complicated right?

nothing complicated. all are free to take up any gothra. gothra is supposed to signify from which rishis clan you are. after 25-30 centuries it makes no sense to take it seriously. what I see strange is that marriages in same gothra are avoided. in certain northern states children defying and marrying in same gothras are made outcastes and are made victims of honour killing

 

[vignesh2014]

These things never happened previously..Therefore these are all out of question...What is wrong in whatever told by our forefathers....if you say in science you should not marry in blood relation you will agree...but if you say don't marry in the same gothra ...you disagree...what double standards you have i don't know...

 

[krish44]

These things never happened previously..Therefore these are all out of question...What is wrong in whatever told by our forefathers....if you say in science you should not marry in blood relation you will agree...but if you say don't marry in the same gothra ...you disagree...what double standards you have i don't know...

we will not marry in same gotra if you threaten us with honour killing.

 

[prasad1]

We have discussed gothram number of times in this site.
Gothram is no more than an alumni, for some forefather. There is no lineage associated with it.
There are gothram for Brahmins, shatriyas, and Vaishyas. I met a Rajput in Rajasthan with the same gothram as mine a Tamil Brahmin. If lineage was associated with Gothram the Rajput and I would have the same rishi as our forefather, which is impossible. But his forefather and my forefather may have attended the same Rishi's school and that is the reason for sagothram.

Gothram word comes from Goshala, that too lends credence to the Alumni theory.

The women assumed the last name or gothram of the husband.
Renukaji only wife has legal and social rites, or rights. In olden days live-in or concubines could not claim any of the "privileges" accorded to the wife.

 

[rishikesan]

Is there need to raise this Topic. Gotharm indicates that they are brothers and sisters of the same. Gothram. Meaning brothers and sisters will not marry each other,.Also ours is pa
Bornean is fixed, cannot be transferred.

 

[prasad1]

Is there need to raise this Topic. Gotharm indicates that they are brothers and sisters of the same. Gothram. Meaning brothers and sisters will not marry each other,.Also ours is pa
Bornean is fixed, cannot be transferred.

Are you saying that 90% of the wold lives in Incest? Majority of people in the world do nor know their gotheram. So before making dire prediction based on your baseless theory, you should educate yourself, otherwise only tour ignorance is displayed.

How can there be only 28 rishies responsible for the all these progenies? If your theory is right then what is to say that Adam and eve are not ancestors?

 

[crbsram]

Namaste Shri Prasad


When you are following Vedic path of living there is no concept of Adam and Eve. First of all there are many rishis who are the mantra trashtasof vedic as well as mantra shastraa. they even had progeny. So if you closely watch the people many don't know their abhivadheya. If you closely observe abhivadheya the vatu says that he hails from so and so lineage and from this gothram and follows this srauta sutra and the sakha (like Rig veda adhyayi or yajur veda adhyayi) and tells his name. So your count for 28 rishis is not correct. I suggest you to read vedas of your sva sakha where you can find many rishis who are mantra trashtas.




How the gothram changes for a Woman who is marrying? if you observe before the pani grahana acharya from boy side and acharya from girl side will recite the gothra prava for boy side thrice and grils side twice and for the third time they say that from now on she will follow the gothra pravara on this lineage. the reason why vaidika dharma gave importance to woman is that they gave the dharma paripalana to woman so that they will be resposible for bringing values to the family. So that is the reason why in vaidika dharma grihani is called as dharmapatni.




Sri Sacchidananda Shiva abhinava sri nrsimha bharati thirtha charanaara vindhabhyaam namah


Sri chandrasekharendra saraswathi maha swami charanaara vindhabhyaam namah


Sri chandrasekhara bharati thirtha charanaara vindhabhyaam namah

 

[renuka]

I have another question here.

This Gotra of a woman changing after marriage is just namesake isnt it?

Does Gotra actually change?

Cos if it does just say Miss A married Mr B and become a Mr Bs gotra..and say that Mr B dies..so Miss A is still Mr B's Gotra per tradition....in that case can the widowed Miss A marry her own brother now? Cos her gotra has changed after marriage isnt it and no more the same as her birth brother.So the once brother and sister and no more Sagotra..can they marry???

But I am sure no one will answer this question cos everyone will say widow remarriage is not allowed and case closed and no one will actually know if such a marriage is possible?LOL

 

[krish44]

I have another question here.

This Gotra of a woman changing after marriage is just namesake isnt it?

Does Gotra actually change?

Cos if it does just say Miss A married Mr B and become a Mr Bs gotra..and say that Mr B dies..so Miss A is still Mr B's Gotra per tradition....in that case can the widowed Miss A marry her own brother now? Cos her gotra has changed after marriage isnt it and no more the same as her birth brother.So the once brother and sister and no more Sagotra..can they marry???

But I am sure no one will answer this question cos everyone will say widow remarriage is not allowed and case closed and no one will actually know if such a marriage is possible?LOL

girls marry their uncle or uncles son [ mothers brother or his son] as they are different gothra. mothers gothra changes to fathers after marriage., it is common in south though medically not a sound practise to marry such a close relation.

 

[vignesh2014]

If lots and lots of people why should she marry her own brother? (is it for argument sake only?)...Even if Adam and Eve have come from the same God , how Adam and Eve got married ? (Are they not from the same father ?Why are you not questioning other christian and muslim faiths?

 

[vignesh2014]

there are myths in every religion but even bible is told by the christians as History only. Uncle marriage is done in those times because they want an united family. They want their wealth not to get split up. Mainly there was no problem of genetic problems because mostly village life was very healthy without any stress. There was no one there to confuse them with science. Just like tribal life, village life also was very peaceful. They had their own wisdom without studying itself and it never failed them.

 

[renuka]

If lots and lots of people why should she marry her own brother? (is it for argument sake only?)...Even if Adam and Eve have come from the same God , how Adam and Eve got married ? (Are they not from the same father ?Why are you not questioning other christian and muslim faiths?

I am asking a hypothetical question...and would also hope an answer.

I am not questioning any faith here..cos marriage has nothing to do with religion..marriage is a cultural socio economic and carnal contract between 2 consenting partners.

BTW I remember reading some part of the Bible about 2 females who got their father drunk and they one of them gunned it with her father!LOL

The words used repeatedly is "he lay with..she lay with" after a while you start to wonder "hey what am I reading?"LOL

You see Adam and Eve had 2 sons Abel and Cain and both of them married their own sisters!



Then Cain killed Abel cos Abel got to marry the more beautiful sister..so you see religious text of other religions do have incest.

In Tamil Nadu men also marry their nieces(sisters daughter) which is sanctioned by culture but considered incest by other states in India.

So its hard to say who is right and who is wrong.

 

[prasad1]

girls marry their uncle or uncles son [ mothers brother or his son] as they are different gothra. mothers gothra changes to fathers after marriage., it is common in south though medically not a sound practise to marry such a close relation.

Only in the south, In the north India it is still considered as incest to marry your Mama or Mama's son.

 

[narayanan.a]

marriages within close relatives are not advisable.

 

[ns_sridhar77]

Thank you very much.

Now i have another question. As discussed by few...in the case of marring a divorced women and she has a child...

Some say the wife's gothra automatically changes to the husband's gothra....What about the girl child now ?

When the child grows and ready for marriage, what gothram should i mention ?

Or is there a way to adopt her and make her come into my gothra ??

Can you pls help me....

 

[Iyyarooraan]

In stead of dwelling on the origins of gothra, you can say the gothra identification has helped those family progeny fairly good. A minority community has suffered a lot because others would not get into that community's in matrimonial alliance. The gothra sticks to the wife who has come in but it goes away if she goes away too from the family. But the gothra will stick to the male progeny in spite of mother's separation. There is no knowing the gothra has come down to the present generation without corruption. For instance how many of our people know of their gothra? Thank god and the westerners and others, our people would like to talk about it. Yes. Gothra is an identification and till today it has no legal standing. Some of our intelligent people while giving name in birth certificate/school registers to their children, add gothra as surname. Again only this community has questions about their past or rather is ignorant of their pasts. Lot of people are trying to bring up this community and let us hope they will come up. Parents of children should also contribute.

 

[renuka]

Thank you very much.

Now i have another question. As discussed by few...in the case of marring a divorced women and she has a child...

Some say the wife's gothra automatically changes to the husband's gothra....What about the girl child now ?

When the child grows and ready for marriage, what gothram should i mention ?

Or is there a way to adopt her and make her come into my gothra ??

Can you pls help me....

In other words a guy is marrying a divorcee with a daughter and you want to know how to make the step daughter the same gotra as the step dad.

Why cant you let her be the same gotra as her biological dad? What is wrong with that?

In Islam..only the biological dad can give away the bride and if her biological dad is dead or not to traceable..a person is appointed from the religious department to give away the bride...what is called a Wali Hakim.

A divorced male has to still come back to conduct his daughters wedding even though his ex wife could have remarried cos no other person who is blood related to her or even her step dad can give her away during marriage...only the biological dad has that right.

So in this case why dont you let the girl have her biological dad's gotra?

Let her have what is rightfully hers..just becos the marriage between her mum and dad did not work out that does not change the status of her being the daughter of her father.

Let her have her original gotra..you can love her as your own daughter but let her have her original identity.

All this gotra changing sometimes makes it seems that females have no say in their lives.

What is wrong if a female still wants to maintain her identity?

For a minor child she might not be able to make a decision..so let her turn 18 and ask her if she wants to change her gotra or not cos she might want some role of her biological dad in her life.

BTW what has the girl child's mother have to say about this? Does she allow her daughters gotra to be changed?