Think or sink!

[Visalakshi Ramani]

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Madam
I feel you have been putting on a great act . I fully believe you are totally young

Actress zohra sehgal wanted to date when she was 90 a man of similar age.

she had a great sense of humour'

she acted in films upto the age of 97 years

talking of Avviyaar , my wife when she was young college student used to be teased and called Avvaiyar as she resented the advances of boys of her age group.she

was and is very pretty.she used to sermonise boys and would stay away when as a group the boys along with girls go to movies bunking classes, she was a great spoil

sport

dear Sir,
I LIKE your wife even though I KNOW her only as Mrs. Krish!
I know that pretty girls will have to extra careful!!!

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

Madam
I feel you have been putting on a great act . I fully believe you are totally young

Actress zohra sehgal wanted to date when she was 90 a man of similar age.

she had a great sense of humour'

she acted in films upto the age of 97 years

talking of Avviyaar , my wife when she was young college student used to be teased and called Avvaiyar as she resented the advances of boys of her age group.she

was and is very pretty.she used to sermonise boys and would stay away when as a group the boys along with girls go to movies bunking classes, she was a great spoil

sport

dear Mr. Krish,
I can prove that I am NOT putting on act.
Just visit my photo gallery and look the newest photos.
They have not been touched or airbrushed or Photoshopped.
You can see how really look and also know how really I feel
despite having so many reasons to look like an Ex.P.M.

 

[krish44]

Dear Madam VR
Have you met anyone who reads your post starting from last page and responding

Well thats me .

From last page I have reached upto around 1140 from last page . so you will get responses to your older posts in course of time .lol

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

normally there is no shortage of members who try to show off their male superiority and use their psuedo brahmin knowledge to browbeat ladies and keep them in their

place, there is no shortage of MCPs

IF any lady stands up to them and challenges them , they launch personal attacks.

but it is worth challenging them instead of humouring them

if one belongs to a large family , there is never any shortage of family dramas .

you might have been called upon to be the peacemaker to cool and reconcile differing points of views .

Most ladies spend a lot of time being buffer between spouse and children where all their talents are put to full use

overtime they become experts at double talk and managing contradictions.lol

dear Sir,
My elder on found his soul mate in 1999 (?) and
took courage to talk to us about her in 2002 and
had to wait to get married to her till 2004.
Those years are the worst in my life.
I was torn to pieces, grilled, punched and gored
( though not physically but only verbally).
I stood firm by my elder son and
my second son stood firm by both is us.
Lord Hanuman stood by the three of us and
Devi Paraashakti stood by the four of us.
It was he struggle between the aatma balam and bhuja balam.
It is anybody's guess that bhuja blam is not nija balam.
The girl is suitable for him in every aspect,
and she is an Asia, vegan and a devotee of Bhuddha.
Now they have too lovely and bright kids.
Juju the born artist and a great story teller aged five
and Varun who speaks sweet, chaste and unmixed Tamil aged 2 years.
I never trust the fickle minded and selfish human beings.
I draw my strength directly from my ishta daivam Muugan. :hail:

 

[krish44]

dear Mr. Krish,
I can prove that I am NOT putting on act.
Just visit my photo gallery and look the newest photos.
They have not been touched or airbrushed or Photoshopped.
You can see how really look and also know how really I feel
despite having so many reasons to look like an Ex.P.M.

VRji
I do not have to look at any albums .

I know you are pretty .

I have my wifes permission to say so.lol

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

Love marriages -with and without the permission of the parents-
became very easy after my son's wedding 2004.
My son was there to take the entire blame for
whatever anyone crazy member of the family did
including eloping and stabbing the parents from their back.

 

[krish44]

dear Sir,
My elder on found his soul mate in 1999 (?) and
took courage to talk to us about her in 2002 and
had to wait to get married to her till 2004.
Those years are the worst in my life.
I was torn to pieces, grilled, punched and gored
( though not physically but only verbally).
I stood firm by my elder son and
my second son stood firm by both is us.
Lord Hanuman stood by the three of us and
Devi Paraashakti stood by the four of us.
It was he struggle between the aatma balam and bhuja balam.
It is anybody's guess that bhuja blam is not nija balam.
The girl is suitable for him in every aspect,
and she is an Asia, vegan and a devotee of Bhuddha.
Now they have too lovely and bright kids.
Juju the born artist and a great story teller aged five
and Varun who speaks sweet, chaste and unmixed Tamil aged 2 years.
I never trust the fickle minded and selfish human beings.
I draw my strength directly from my ishta daivam Muugan. :hail:

Madam
Happy to know you stood by your children and gave them what they wanted

the couple have to live with each other one lifetime . it is best they choose and we parents bless them that we do not have to decide for them

but I do not know why all the suffering in acceptance . thats TB way of life I suppose

my children made their own choices

I was only relieved that I did not have to choose what was good for them

In fact I taught my son how to court a girl in real earnest.

our children [TBs] are good in academics but are useless when it comes to romance . only parents have to teach them how to go about it.lol

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

VRji
who told you borrowing is difficult?

one has to have only credentials. credentials means pieces of papers which one can collect and give to a bank [a nationalised one] .lo you have the money

it is easier to borrow big money than small money . it is more difficult to earn it

you know the nationalised banks have got what are called NPAs . this is money borrowed by big players which they have not bothered to return .

always think big if you want to be big in life. honesty has nothing to do with all this

dear Mr. Krish,
I am talking from my personal experience.
Please remember that I am not an industrialist.
I am ONLY a house wife/ home maker
We had to buy a flat in short notice (2 decades back)
We had all our money (retirement benefits of my husband)
locked up in long term investments-
since we never imagined such a situation will develop.
Disturbing these deposits will cause us a great loss.
I could not borrow from anyone whom I had trusted
but I got money from unexpected quarters.
Both my sons were students at that time and they could not help us either.
Now it is long past and unpleasant history but sometimes
the sweet lessons learned from those bitter experiences
emege by themselves like butter in the churned buttermilk!

 

[krish44]

Love marriages -with and without the permission of the parents-
became very easy after my son's wedding 2004.
My son was there to take the entire blame for
whatever anyone crazy member of the family did
including eloping and stabbing the parents from their back.

When my brother in law wanted to marry a christian girl, he confided in me and vanished with the girl to get married

Everyone blamed me as I was foolish to confess I know about it

Also I was branded a traitor for damaging my inlaws family

my inlaws did not talk to me for several months . They thought I had something to do with their son getting married to a christian

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

Dear Madam VR
Have you met anyone who reads your post starting from last page and responding

Well thats me .

From last page I have reached upto around 1140 from last page . so you will get responses to your older posts in course of time .lol

I had already guessed it when I read your reply to the post about borrowing money!
Well it is long walk down the lane - since you will have to cover the posts made in ~ 20 months!

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

VRji
I do not have to look at any albums .

I know you are pretty .

I have my wifes permission to say so.lol

Can I safely assume that SHE has not seen my photos either???

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

Madam
Happy to know you stood by your children and gave them what they wanted

the couple have to live with each other one lifetime . it is best they choose and we parents bless them that we do not have to decide for them

but I do not know why all the suffering in acceptance . thats TB way of life I suppose

my children made their own choices

I was only relieved that I did not have to choose what was good for them

In fact I taught my son how to court a girl in real earnest.

our children [TBs] are good in academics but are useless when it comes to romance . only parents have to teach them how to go about it.lol

Strange! The fact which seems to make every parent very happy
seems not to have made you very happy!!!

Arranged marriages of some of the friends of my sons failed miserable.
Relocating was ONE OF THE MAIN problems.

Cultural shocks precipitated the separation in some cases.
They had lost faith in the success of arranged marriages.

And I understood their feeling well - since my own faith
in arranged marriages had become shaky by then!!

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

When my brother in law wanted to marry a christian girl, he confided in me and vanished with the girl to get married

Everyone blamed me as I was foolish to confess I know about it

Also I was branded a traitor for damaging my inlaws family

my inlaws did not talk to me for several months . They thought I had something to do with their son getting married to a christian

I understand your plight for lending a sympathetic :ear: to your B.I.L.

In Laws themselves qualify to become outlaws and /or :spy:

they try their level best to make us feel like outlaws. :heh:

 

[krish44]

dear Mr. Krish,
I am talking from my personal experience.
Please remember that I am not an industrialist.
I am ONLY a house wife/ home maker
We had to buy a flat in short notice (2 decades back)
We had all our money (retirement benefits of my husband)
locked up in long term investments-
since we never imagined such a situation will develop.
Disturbing these deposits will cause us a great loss.
I could not borrow from anyone whom I had trusted
but I got money from unexpected quarters.
Both my sons were students at that time and they could not help us either.
Now it is long past and unpleasant history but sometimes
the sweet lessons learned from those bitter experiences
emege by themselves like butter in the churned buttermilk!

VRji
pl do not ever say you are only housewife/homemaker . it is the most taxing job

for raising money, a person of your wisdom could have easily done it on bank money with all the retirement benefit papers as collateral and hypothecating the house

papers at good rates of interest.



it could have been only good paper management

who buys houses these days on own money .

wisdom lies in utilising borrowing capacity and raising money from financial agencies like banks ,housing finance agencies.

when anytime you project in life that you are financially unviable, usually sources of finance dry up . money always flows to people who project they have plenty of it and

show that by borrowing you are doing borrowers a favour by borrowing from them. this is harsh reality of living

never project you have less money . that damages credibility and borrowing capability

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

Adaap pazhi vidaathu thodarum!!! :tsk:

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

VRji
pl do not ever say you are only housewife/homemaker . it is the most taxing job

for raising money, a person of your wisdom could have easily done it on bank money with all the retirement benefit papers as collateral and hypothecating the house

papers at good rates of interest.



it could have been only good paper management

who buys houses these days on own money .

wisdom lies in utilising borrowing capacity and raising money from financial agencies like banks ,housing finance agencies.

when anytime you project in life that you are financially unviable, usually sources of finance dry up . money always flows to people who project they have plenty of it and

show that by borrowing you are doing borrowers a favour by borrowing from them. this is harsh reality of living

never project you have less money . that damages credibility and borrowing capability

dear Sir,
I/We have never purchased anything on credit or installments so far.
We save the money like chipmunks saving the nuts for winter
and go pay the full amount and buy whatever we wanted to buy.
We may try for a decent discount or free delivery or free fixing etc.
Financial decisions are made by my husband.
And the story is already 20 years old -
when taking loans was still looked down upon!

 

[krish44]

Strange! The fact which seems to make every parent very happy
seems not to have made you very happy!!!

Arranged marriages of some of the friends of my sons failed miserable.
Relocating was ONE OF THE MAIN problems.

Cultural shocks precipitated the separation in some cases.
They had lost faith in the success of arranged marriages.

And I understood their feeling well - since my own faith
in arranged marriages had become shaky by then!!

the great plus point when children make the choices is we have no responsibility for the success or failure of marriage

also since it is their choice , the children work hard to make it a success thru adjustment with each other

also it is best to stay from children for a few years after marriage as thats the period of adjustment for them

if we intervene ,we end up as buffers and end up getting blamed if the marriage is not successful .

My children have been married for a few years , I have never heard them talking negatively about their spouses . In fact they clam up in case we dig to find out if

everything is okay between couples

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

I wrote a few days ago that god wiling my next blog will be on the saints and cultural of India!

I already got the blessings and permission of one of the most loved and respected saints on India!

My friend presented to (a few selected people) who had come for her gruhapravesam

with solid silver coins with the figure of Sheerdi Sai Baba embosed on it

which have been made powerful by the puja done for 48 days in his temple. :hail:

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

I told that even lord Krishna needed an Arjun
to bring out his divine gospel the Bhagavt Gita!
I am happy I have three Krishna(s) enriching some threads.
One is the baby Krishna in my avatar.
Second one is Shri M. Krishna adorning the thread Quotable Quotes II. :clap2:
The third and the latest Krishna is Mr. krish who is enriching this thread! :thumb:

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

I keep the cinnamon powder given by my Chinna MOn (younger son)
and the garam masala powder in similar containers close to each other .
I always used to wonder what will happen IF I put the garam masala
in the tea instead of cinnamon powder- by oversight.
I got the opportunity to test it today! :tea:
I did put by mistake the garam masala powder in the tea
and it turned out to be the best masala tea I have ever drunk!
How can mere cinnmon compete with the agmark garam masala???

 

[krish44]

dear Sir,
I/We have never purchased anything on credit or installments so far.
We save the money like chipmunks saving the nuts for winter
and go pay the full amount and buy whatever we wanted to buy.
We may try for a decent discount or free delivery or free fixing etc.
Financial decisions are made by my husband.
And the story is already 20 years old -
when taking loans was still looked down upon!

you know VRJi
It is conventional wisdom that borrowing is bad. but a decent debt is always good in financial terms
companies have a figure called debt to equity ratio . equity is their equivalent of own money and debt is what they borrow , the debt equity ratio decides what is good

borrowing . same is the case with individual borrowing . if one buys a flat with 60 percent or so of own capital and borrows the rest one can comfortably buy a flat. one

can readjust the payment with rent of the flat in seven years or so

one way of looking at money is to consider it is only a paper which you exchange for goods /house . this way there is no emotional attachment to it. this money papers

along with other papers you give to bank to get bank finance will get you the flat tear free

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

the great plus point when children make the choices is we have no responsibility for the success or failure of marriage

also since it is their choice , the children work hard to make it a success thru adjustment with each other

also it is best to stay from children for a few years after marriage as thats the period of adjustment for them

if we intervene ,we end up as buffers and end up getting blamed if the marriage is not successful .

My children have been married for a few years , I have never heard them talking negatively about their spouses . In fact they clam up in case we dig to find out if

everything is okay between couples

Thankfully we are welcome in the houses of both our sons.
We have ten years' multiple entry VISA.
The grand kids are loving and devoted to us.
Given the choice I will like to spend six months in a year with them.
But as it is we can visit them only once in two years!
My husband feels lost-having nothing to do!
I cherish those visit since I get more time to develop my blogs faster
The chores will be less - even if I take over the kitchen work completely. :typing:

 

[Visalakshi Ramani]

you know VRJi
It is conventional wisdom that borrowing is bad. but a decent debt is always good in financial terms
companies have a figure called debt to equity ratio . equity is their equivalent of own money and debt is what they borrow , the debt equity ratio decides what is good

borrowing . same is the case with individual borrowing . if one buys a flat with 60 percent or so of own capital and borrows the rest one can comfortably buy a flat. one

can readjust the payment with rent of the flat in seven years or so

one way of looking at money is to consider it is only a paper which you exchange for goods /house . this way there is no emotional attachment to it. this money papers

along with other papers you give to bank to get bank finance will get you the flat tear free

Finance is a difficult subject.
It sound like a paper tiger!
But I am glad I bought the flat
for what was considered a very high price then.
Now we can easily sell it for four times the money we had paid for it.
But we can't buy another new flat unless we pay
two times what we will be able to raise by selling it. :dizzy:

 

[krish44]

Strange! The fact which seems to make every parent very happy
seems not to have made you very happy!!!

Arranged marriages of some of the friends of my sons failed miserable.
Relocating was ONE OF THE MAIN problems.

Cultural shocks precipitated the separation in some cases.
They had lost faith in the success of arranged marriages.

And I understood their feeling well - since my own faith
in arranged marriages had become shaky by then!!

What I have against arranged marriages is parents look for status of family , horoscope, caste and sub caste

they have no means of checking mana porutham. children look for physical beauty in addition to academic proficiency and job and are the least bothered about other

things .

so most end up with an average choice with compromises making no one happy and the family members start blaming each other for a bad choice

relocation, cultural shocks are manifestation of a deep malaise . the basic inability to adjust to each others requirement by married couple .

many married couple have a remote marriage and live happily. cultural differences do not really mean much for persons in love

 

[krish44]

Thankfully we are welcome in the houses of both our sons.
We have ten years' multiple entry VISA.
The grand kids are loving and devoted to us.
Given the choice I will like to spend six months in a year with them.
But as it is we can visit them only once in two years!
My husband feels lost-having nothing to do!
I cherish those visit since I get more time to develop my blogs faster
The chores will be less - even if I take over the kitchen work completely. :typing:

I keep track of my children . but my visit to them never exceeds more than two weeks at a time.

I act the busiest when I am with them going to movies and pleasure spots when they slog in the office

men always get lost after children get married and go away . they can never reconcile to their going away and more so if it is a daughter