Shouldn't we bow at the feet of "Athithi's??

[Srimadhan]

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I had been to Amarnath Last year. On the return, we went to Madhura & Brindhavan wherein one of our guru’s disciples had invited us to his home. Once we all sat comfortably, we were introduced to his family. The younger one’s touched the feet of “ALL” of us. I asked why they touched the feet of even “THEIR YOUNGER” one’s. They explained me that any person who comes to their home is an “Athithi”. As stated in Upanishads “Athithi Devo Bhava”, they bowed all of us. In my home, we bow at the feet of elder’s at the birthday’s, festive’s etc. I understand from a friend of mine and his son and daughter bow at the mother and father’s feet every day.

Upanishad’s states “Matru Devo Bhava” Pitru Devo Bhava” Acharya Devo Bhava” and “Athithi Devo Bhava”.

From these instances, the following question stems in my mind Why are “ELDERS” not bowing down to Athithi’s “IRRESPECTIVE OF THEIR AGE”

Is this because

a. Do not wish to follow Upanishad’s.
b. Consider themselves greater.
c. Their ego stops this.
d. Will look awkward
e. Customer practice.
f. As we have bowed to them in our Mind, do not feel it is necessary to bow at their feet.

My understanding is that the only stopping point is “EGO”. I also feel that elders must stand as an example by both “Saying and Following”.

Would like to know all of your views.

Regards
Srimadhan

 

[renuka]

Dear Sir,

Let me relate a story to you.

When my father once visited South Korea for an official trip he was invited for dinner to the house of his Korean counterpart who was also a Director in the Ministry of Labour.

To my fathers surprise the lady of the house(the wife of the Director) had wiped my fathers shoes and polished it when my dad was having his dinner and she brought the shoes for him to wear as he was leaving.

My father was totally shocked and felt very sad that the lady of the house had polished his shoes without his knowledge when he was eating his dinner.

My father was told that it is a Korean custom that the lady of the house need to polish the shoes of the guest who comes in.

So other cultures even go one step further in Athiti Devo Bhava.


Ok coming to falling on feet custom..out here I grew up in a home where we never touched feet of anyone including parents.

My parents especially my mother used to say to only reserve touching of feet for Swamijis and Monks.

So the only time I fell on anyone's feet was on my wedding day when I fell on my parents and inlaws feet as per custom...after that I don't remember falling on anyone's feet besides Swamijis and Monks.

 

[biswa]

I feel that we should touch the feet of people we personally love and respect, not people who lay claim to titles such as President, Prime Minister, Swamiji or Atithi. The person deserves the respect, not the position. For example, I don't respect George W. Bush or Indira Gandhi just because they were head of state. On the other hand, I could touch the feet of my uncle, who was poor, unsuccessful and nondescript just because I could feel his affection for me. People in India will even fall at the feet of Amitabh Bachchan even though they know nothing about him personally.

 

[sangom]

I had been to Amarnath Last year. On the return, we went to Madhura & Brindhavan wherein one of our guru’s disciples had invited us to his home. Once we all sat comfortably, we were introduced to his family. The younger one’s touched the feet of “ALL” of us. I asked why they touched the feet of even “THEIR YOUNGER” one’s. They explained me that any person who comes to their home is an “Athithi”. As stated in Upanishads “Athithi Devo Bhava”, they bowed all of us. In my home, we bow at the feet of elder’s at the birthday’s, festive’s etc. I understand from a friend of mine and his son and daughter bow at the mother and father’s feet every day.

Upanishad’s states “Matru Devo Bhava” Pitru Devo Bhava” Acharya Devo Bhava” and “Athithi Devo Bhava”.

From these instances, the following question stems in my mind Why are “ELDERS” not bowing down to Athithi’s “IRRESPECTIVE OF THEIR AGE”

Is this because

a. Do not wish to follow Upanishad’s.
b. Consider themselves greater.
c. Their ego stops this.
d. Will look awkward
e. Customer practice.
f. As we have bowed to them in our Mind, do not feel it is necessary to bow at their feet.

My understanding is that the only stopping point is “EGO”. I also feel that elders must stand as an example by both “Saying and Following”.

Would like to know all of your views.

Regards
Srimadhan

The upanishad says "atithi devo bhava". It means that the guest should be treated as if he/she were deva or devi. The usual respects or upacāras due to a deva or devi are āsanaṃ, arghyaṃ, pādyaṃ, ācamanīyaṃ, madhuparkkaṃ, snānaṃ, vastraṃ :' uttarīyam, dhūpam, dīpam, naivedyam :' then only pradakṣiṇam and namaskāram. We do not perform all these upacāras to ordinary guests nor will they (the guests) like such treatment today. Therefore, if there are youngsters in the house, these children used to do namaskāram to the guests who were elder to them and the guests or visitors used to do namaskaram to the elderly persons if any in the host's house also. This was the old tabra practice.

Today, I think youngsters will not like to be called upon to do namaskaram to the old guests, nor will many of the fashionable crowd like to go on a visit to some relative's house and do namaskaram to the old parents there. The culture among we people has changed a lot.

Coming to the north Indian practice of just a show of touching the elders' feet, this is very routine and does not show any respect. In Malayalam, some people make fun of this north Indian custom by describing it as "காலு வாரல்"(kālu vāral) - which it very much looks like; this Malayalam phrase actually means cheating or making fun of, toppling, etc.

I, therefore, feel that this "touching the feet" has been not adopted, wisely, in the south. Anyway, what purpose will such touching the feet serve in the case of casual, evening visitors?

 

[auh]

... The person deserves the respect, not the position. For example, I don't respect George W. Bush or Indira Gandhi just because they were head of state. On the other hand, I could touch the feet of my uncle, who was poor, unsuccessful and nondescript just because I could feel his affection for me. People in India will even fall at the feet of Amitabh Bachchan even though they know nothing about him personally.

The position deserves the respect, not the person, it must be?

There are two categories, one that deserve respect as a person, and one, that command respect by virtue of position. A policeman would have to salute to the MLA/MP/IAS irrespective of how the person is.

But, if someone were to be an "attithi" to the house, it would most probably be a known one. But still exceptions may be there, and in such cases the position deserves the respect.

Having said that, respect, nowadays, is mostly kept in the minds of people.

 

[auh]

Therefore, if there are youngsters in the house, these children used to do namaskāram to the guests who were elder to them and the guests or visitors used to do namaskaram to the elderly persons if any in the host's house also. This was the old tabra practice.

Today, I think youngsters will not like to be called upon to do namaskaram to the old guests, nor will many of the fashionable crowd like to go on a visit to some relative's house and do namaskaram to the old parents there. The culture among we people has changed a lot.

The practice of doing namaskarams is very well alive in many tabra families, including mine.

But I have to agree with the second para above.

 

[Vaagmi]

Reading the OP I mused and I got this:

1. In vaishnavite tradition, anjali has more to do with surrender. It involves more of a mental process followed by a physical process.

2. As per Sastras Age is the sole criteria for anjali/prostration only in respect of Shudras.

3. As per Sastras wealth is the criterion for anjali in respect of Vysyas. The richer one deserves the pranams.

4. As per sastras power and valour are the criteria in respect of Kshatriyas to deserve pranams.

5. As per the same Sastras knowledge/vidwat is the criterion for pranam in respect of brahmins. Thus even if a brahmin is young he deserves the pranam if he is well read and is knowledgeable. No other conditions need to be fullfilled.

6. When you are any where inside a temple you do not offer pranams to any one other than the deity.

7. When you offer pranam to your Acharyan or to any other Yati you do not say அபிவாதயே........ etc.,

Hope this helps.

 

[renuka]

I once had an older person fall on my feet... one HIV positive transgender former sex worker/ drug addict who was admitted in the hospital.

He was older to me ...(he is dead now)..he fell on my feet cos he felt I was the only person in his life so far who treated him with respect.

Many people actually treat transgenders badly..all they crave for is respect and nothing more.

 

[amala]

My mother brought us up to do namaskaram to our elders, mostly we had to do it to our uncles, aunts, granduncles, grandaunts and relatives when we went to India. As we are leaving their homes she'd make us do namaskaram. Now I'm thinking hey I'm supposed to be the Athiti, aren't they supposed to fall on my feet . But seriously now even if you are willing to do namaskaram, other people think we're the mentals!

 

[renuka]

Now I'm thinking hey I'm supposed to be the Athiti, aren't they supposed to fall on my feet . But seriously now even if you are willing to do namaskaram, other people think we're the mentals!

LOL! Can't stop laughing.

 

[P.J.]

There are differences and variations in doing the Namaskaram (prostration) on ground.

1.In South Ashta Anga Namaskaram by gents and Panja Anga Namaskaram by ladies are prescribed.

A Single Namaskaram to Parents, Elders and Gurus is in practice. But Vadakalai Iyengars do it twice or four times.

In North a slight bent with touching the feet (or near ground) with right hand is done for Namskar.

For Tridanti Sanyasis (Worshiping Vishnu) it should be three times.

'விஷ்ணோர் யதேஸ்து மநுநா மூலேந மஹதாபி ய:

நமஸ்காரத்ரயம் குர்யாத் சாச்வதீம் முக்திமாப்நுயாத்'

“Vishnor yathesthu manuna moolene mahathapi yah
Namaskaratriyam kuryath saashvathim mukthimabnuyath” (Smiriti Sangraham)

‘If a person, sees a Tridanti sanyasi (or yathi), the person should chant Astaksharam and should do Namaskaram three times. ’

Tridanti Sanyasis is our family Acharya (H.H. Ahobila Mutt Jeer Swamigal) and my father says that we have to do Namskaram continously till the Acharya says 'STOP'.

2.No Ground Namskaram to the following:

In temples one should do folded hands Namaskaram to elders if required. Ground Namaskaram is only for God and that is in specified places.

Lying in bed persons and persons having wet cloths

When one is impure (vriti or kshayam, birth and death periods) one should not do Namskaram to anybody.

Younger persons

(3) No Abhivadanam after Namaskaram to the following:

God

More than one male, ( in group)

Ladies (to mother even in single, Abhivadanam is prescribed)

Sanyasi

(4) Varieties of Namaskarams:

Ekanga Namaskaram : Head down posture (standing)

Thraianga Namskaram: Folded hands are above head (standing).

Panja Anga Namaskaram: Two hands, two knees and Head are touching the ground (for ladies).

Asta Anga Namaskaram: Head, two hands, two ears (one first and other next) two knees and chest are touching ground (for gents).


Source: Sri.C. Vidya Rajagopalan

Yahoo answers.

 

[amala]

I've seen some people mostly couples and males do ground namaskaram to the priest after archanai.

 

[Nara]

For Tridanti Sanyasis (Worshiping Vishnu) it should be three times.

‘If a person, sees a Tridanti sanyasi (or yathi), the person should chant Astaksharam and should do Namaskaram three times. ’

Tridanti Sanyasis is our family Acharya (H.H. Ahobila Mutt Jeer Swamigal) and my father says that we have to do Namskaram continously till the Acharya says 'STOP'.

This is contrary to what I have observed. Sishyas prostrate 4 times for Vadakalai Tridandi acharyas. Only under certain circumstances one is supposed to keep prostrating until the acharyas stops you, not every time.

In temples one should do folded hands Namaskaram to elders if required. Ground Namaskaram is only for God and that is in specified places.

At the dwaja stambam you are supposed to prostrate, and once you cross it no more falling on the ground.

 

[Nara]

I've seen some people mostly couples and males do ground namaskaram to the priest after archanai.

This is due to ignorance of rules ... If one wishes to fall at the feet of the Archaka one needs to do it outside the temple.

 

[C RAVI]

This is due to ignorance of rules ... If one wishes to fall at the feet of the Archaka one needs to do it outside the temple.

Absolutely!!

 

[C RAVI]

At the dwaja stambam you are supposed to prostrate, and once you cross it no more falling on the ground.

Very much True!!