Resurrection of family in india

[krish44]

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When joint families made way for nuclear a few decades back , many seniors were disappointed with the change.

Now the wheel has turned a little back.

Many youngsters want the protection of family and would like to have parents with them or stay with them.

Many homes one comes across boys and girls hanging on to parents until late twenties to enable to get more academic degrees .When they get jobs with low

salaries and work culture is hire and fire,youngsters living with parents makes sense financially.

but in many cases old parents are finding it difficult to live with grown up children..

The lifestyle of adult 25plus children, their social life,food habits is in conflict with those of parents..

If the children get married, not many parents like to put up with son and DIL .They fear becoming baby sitters or drivers for their next generation.

Most senior parents would after retirement would like to have life of their own . They would like socialise with people of their choice, go around the world to

exotic location and see what it has to offer.

Yet when children forcibly stay put and refuse to leave the parental homes, old seniors are emotionally pressurised.They cannot be callous.

Even marriages have become unstable. When girls walk out of marriages and end up as divorcees, they end up again in homes of their parents , sometimes

with a kid also.

These create a bad situation for parents to live with as they are looking for last few years of life to be spent enjoying better things of life after a lifetime of

work and responsibilities.

New models are getting worked out where parents live close to children if not under the same roof to have mutual protection and freedom from each other also.

Ideal is parents and children buying multiple flats in same society , having their own kitchen and getting together on occassions or emergencies.

I always try to buy two flats in every city in a society.The second serves the purpose of accommodating the child in distress or a relative who lands up looking

for hospitality....One has to plan not only for ourselves but also the next generation.lol

 

[kunjuppu]

krish,

this has become a reality in north america. due to the miserable job market, large burden of student loan, high cost of renting in cities (it at all they find jobs), post university, children are coming back.

this is a big problem for parents. because, we have been looking forward to retirement from the daily chores. for a number of years, it was just husband and wife. between us, we can manage on almost nothing. no special food or extra work.

now the children come back. elaborate meals. laundry. extra expenses. more expenses if they are unemployed. the children blame the economic climate, but part of the problem, is their own attitude.whereas the parents were happy to land a job, make the most of it, and move on with life, the children are finnicky to extent of not venturing to many fields, as they are simply 'not interested'.

Apparently the parents 'dont understand' the changed environment as things are not the same as when the parents were young!!

The next step, is when eventually they move out, a few years later, find a partner, have children, the parents are really old and infirm. Guess what? In order to save daycare expenses, the grand child lands 'bang' on the grand parent's house every weekday morning. And sometimes the whole weekend, if the parents have to attend a function or party

Go figure this out!!

 

[rishikesan]

The above 2 , narration reveals change of circumstances, , uncertainty of Jobs ,taking care of grand children etc will give more respect & value to Thathas & pattis . It amounts to living together of a few members of like-minded, adjusting of the same family, & it will be excellent to All to have real Freedom , as well as cohesion & have much needed Security , in these bad days of terrorism either in U.S. or India .

Rishikesan ( A. Srinivasan )

 

[vgane]

The above 2 , narration reveals change of circumstances, , uncertainty of Jobs ,taking care of grand children etc will give more respect & value to Thathas & pattis . It amounts to living together of a few members of like-minded, adjusting of the same family, & it will be excellent to All to have real Freedom , as well as cohesion & have much needed Security , in these bad days of terrorism either in U.S. or India . Rishikesan ( A. Srinivasan )

Dear Rishi Sir, Appreciate your value system! This may be the umbilical cord for survival of the family!