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Life is in peril...need help.....

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The good qualities as seen by his well wisher is given 0n #1.Did she not noticed any negative aspect with him.Genaraly a good person in the eyes of all his friends is not so in the vision of his wife who is more intimate with him than others.Please try to get at that and one may get a solution.A PSYCHOLOGIST's help may be useful.

This is a very important point.Close friends are only hearing one side of the story.
Many so called good people have a dark side no one really knows.I am not saying that this person concern has this but there might be some intimate problems which only a spouse will realize.

Sometimes even a Mr Perfect can be boring to live with and some wives just leave them.
You have to take into account that this person can not get over the past and he might stand the risk of having a too clinging on type of nature which could be bordering into wanting perfection in married life.

I know of a person who didnt have a girlfriend before marriage becos he felt that he will only love a girl after marriage and married a person known to me by arranged marriage.
This guy after marriage asked his wife if she had a boyfriend before and when she said yes that was it..he became extremely depressed and started to become suspicious also cos he felt his dream had crumbled.He eventually ruined the marriage.

Some men build castles in the air about married life and when this prefect dream doesnt materialize things can take a different turn and they can make life of others hell.
A person does not have to be violent to be abusive..even a passive person can drive anyone up the wall.

Its always better to listen to both sides of the story.

Another factor all of us here are not considering is sexual preformance of both partners in this case.
Is he having any sexual related problem or is she having any sexual related problem that interferes in the marriage?

From what I see this is a very complex case..please see a good psychiatrist to find out the actual problem besides praying to God for help.
 
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Dear Renuka mom, In my opinion love and affection is the root for a better family life. Once there is mutual understanding all other problems are secondary. Sexual problem to the extent of ditching a husband is something abnormal which should have been sorted out by wife had she really loved her husband. This year is my 25th anniversary life and I can say with my experience that love and love only is important in life which can solve many problems.regards,S.Ramanathan
 
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Dear Renuka mom, In my opinion love and affection is the root for a better family life. Once there is mutual understanding all other problems are secondary. Sexual problem to the extent of ditching a husband is something abnormal which should have been sorted out by wife had she really loved her husband. This year is my 25th anniversary life and I can say with my experience that love and love only is important in life which can solve many problems.regards,S.Ramanathan

Dear Ramanathan Beta,

Its actually happens that some wifes ditch their husbands cos of sexual problems.Its not that they are not sexually satisfied but at times its the guys who make life difficult.

From my experience as a doctor I have seen cases where men who have erectile dysfunctions ED become very very suspicious of wifes(who are actually not cheating on them) and even resort to physical violence or mental abuse.
Some men are sexually normal but has performance anxiety and that cause an ED.
So some wives leave cos they cant stand the abuse both physical and mental.

Some women are frigid by nature and will try every excuse to avoid sex with husband and even walk out on him to avoid sex.

The Indian society doesnt take into the account most of the while the sexual needs of a woman in a marriage.
We tend to think that sex is not so important especially for a woman..but its not true all the while.
The sex act is not about being physical but its an extension of love(what someone in forum mentioned before)

In the Hindu marriage a man is not blamed if he doesnt have sex with his wife as often but in a Muslim marriage there is something called "Nafkah Batin"(Sexual duties) where its obligatory for both husband and wife to commit to fullfilling their sexual duties.
It can be grounds for divorce if this is not met.

Love in a marriage is emotional,physical and at times spiritual.Nothing should be neglected.
 
Hi
My husband collegues has severe problem in life. He has been married more than 12 years and her wife abandoned him at middle of life and ran away. She went to court and got expartee divorce. He did not participate any trial. He is trying for the past two years not
successful (to bring her back). He is a very good person and having good conduct and
very pious etc. I know him and visited his house with my husband. He could not get support from his family because other's jealous about him. Further other's are not much educated like him.

He is undergoing severe depression in life. He has to take care of himself and his old mother.
His only support is his mother. One more issues, he did not have proper job so far. He has job contractual then and there. He can not go back to India due to immigration status.
He wants to stay here for another 3+ years earn some money bought a flat in Bangalore and settle down. His mother is very old and living alone. His other brother/sister's are not helping her also. Even though I am a women, I believe now a days women create a lot of problem than men. I never saw a good person like my husbands collegue. He is a man of high caliber and credential.

God punished him , because he is good. I have to say this. No words can describe his sufferings.

I want to help him as a humanitarian means..

1. Anybody doing pooja/vasiayam etc...to unite such ladies...

2. Any living Guru or sanyasi or 'acharya' can intervene and save his life.

3. Any temple visit performing some remedy like yaga or homam will unite this lady
with her.

4 . He need support from his family also....

I appreciate all your comments and ideas...

Sujatha.

Smt Sujatha -

When a marriage breaks down, often but not always, both parties have played a role. It is easy to see one side (of your friend) and not know all that has happened.

Your friend needs professional help like Dr Renu has suggested.

While meditation and prayer if done properly can help calm anyone's mind getting someone to see an astrologer or visit a temple is not going to rectify the situation. It raises false hopes and leads one to superstition in the middle of a crisis in my view.

After getting well and being able to clearly see how his assumptions about life and his own action have caused this situation your friend can take up religious traditions for better life with someone else.

Unless one is truly fulfilled (for most part most of the time) it is not possible to have a selfless love for anyone including our own children. Often we like or love someone because they seem to evoke a nice sense about ourselves in us and we mistake that to be love. It is actually selfish love and this is the case for most people. In extreme cases like that of your friend he is longing for that good feeling that his ex-wife may have evoked in him. Best thing is for him to get help, get better, and then understand these points so that in his next relationship he is likely to be more harmonious.

Sometimes life provides teaching moments at a time when we least want a lesson. With good friends like you and your husband I hope your friend gets better. The best you can do is to refer him to a qualified psychaitrist!

All the best..
 
A few points to ponder:-

Why is he so keen in getting united with his wife - who does not want him any more?

Running after a woman is like running after your own shadow! You will never be able to catch it.

This man had never had a good / permanent job!

I guess they never had any children either.

This makes the parting very sensible and logical on the part of the ex-wife.

In all probability she was the earning member and
the real head of the family.

No woman will leave a husband after 12 years of togetherness unless she really had had enough and more than enough.

Divorces due to difficulties in adjustments happen soon after wedding and not one maamaangam later.


If my intuition is correct, he must have a lead an easy and pious life, supported by his over-worked and under-nourished wife.

She must have left him - even without visiting the Sani Bhagavan temple, seeking his assistance for the separation.

Why would the siblings be jealous of a man just because he is more qualified?

What is the use of such a qualification which can't get him a permanent job?

Sorry sister! I am not impressed by your cry for help. And
You are doing more damage to the man than you realise.
 
A few points to ponder:-

Why is he so keen in getting united with his wife - who does not want him any more?

Running after a woman is like running after your own shadow! You will never be able to catch it.

This man had never had a good / permanent job!

I guess they never had any children either.

This makes the parting very sensible and logical on the part of the ex-wife.

In all probability she was the earning member and
the real head of the family.

No woman will leave a husband after 12 years of togetherness unless she really had had enough and more than enough.

Divorces due to difficulties in adjustments happen soon after wedding and not one maamaangam later.


If my intuition is correct, he must have a lead an easy and pious life, supported by his over-worked and under-nourished wife.

She must have left him - even without visiting the Sani Bhagavan temple, seeking his assistance for the separation.

Why would the siblings be jealous of a man just because he is more qualified?

What is the use of such a qualification which can't get him a permanent job?

Sorry sister! I am not impressed by your cry for help. And
You are doing more damage to the man than you realise.

I completely agree with what Smt. VR has said above.

One case (not tabra) comes to my memory. This happened in India, not abroad, as is seen in the OP. The husband was a pure rolling stone gathering nothing and the family lived on the wife's hard earned pittance from a factory type of job. Then one day, the husband struck upon a gold mine - make some really good money through his good-looking wife! She left him and went off to her native place. It was long ago, before divorce, etc., became as easy as today and I also had to leave the place due to transfer so I don't know what transpired later on.

Surely the husband's life here - in the OP case - is in danger most probably because of his own karma (actions); that is my confirmed view.
 


Divorces due to difficulties in adjustments happen soon after wedding and not one maamaangam later.

i have heard that there is a spurt of divorces of couples in their 60s, usually initiated by women.

this, when the man has retired and come to stay full time at home, and all the hidden tensions accumulated through the years, come out.

tensions which have been set aside, in order to keep a unified home for the children, a separation put aside due to entreaties of the children, a wife desiring to get out of a mode of nurse/caretaker and 'enjoy' life - travelling and such.

what i say is in the west. in india it might be different.

many retired man, having no other interests, are miserable, and spoil the peace of the house, with their constant presence, and the housekeeping wife, who had been used to a 'certain space & time' for herself, now finds, under constant supervision, nagging, demands and above all exhaustion. retired men, should be very sensitive, that while they are 'retired', their spouse, now has to work 'overtime'. this, i think, is common both in india, and the west.

how many times, we have heard, 'i am happily retired', and one just have to glance at the wife, to see her face then!
 
Dear Renuka mom, In my opinion love and affection is the root for a better family life. Once there is mutual understanding all other problems are secondary. Sexual problem to the extent of ditching a husband is something abnormal which should have been sorted out by wife had she really loved her husband. This year is my 25th anniversary life and I can say with my experience that love and love only is important in life which can solve many problems.regards,S.Ramanathan

Sri. Ramanathan, Greetings.

I am curious. Why should the wife be responsible to sort out the problem? Is it not the respondsibility of the husband too? What is wrong if the woman desires a quality sustained performance from her husband? Woman needs satisfaction too. What's more, women are capable of 'multiple orgasms'. It is up to the men to provide them.

Cheers!
 
dear Mr. sangom,
I want to know how the husband made good money through his good looking wife and whether it precipitated the separation.
If it is alright to reveal it, please do so.
with warm regards,
Mrs.V.R.
 
many retired man, having no other interests, are miserable, and spoil the peace of the house, with their constant presence, and the housekeeping wife, who had been used to a 'certain space & time' for herself, now finds, under constant supervision, nagging, demands and above all exhaustion. retired men, should be very sensitive, that while they are 'retired', their spouse, now has to [COLOR=#da7911 !important][FONT=inherit !important][COLOR=#da7911 !important][FONT=inherit !important]work[/FONT][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR] 'overtime'. this, i think, is common both in india, and the west.


Dear Mr. kunjuppu,

you are absolutely right. By that time they retire, they also become partly deaf. So the T.V will be blaring round the clock.

The men manage to keep their wives on their toes. They can't even make a glass of 'hot water' (!).

The children who are the binding agents are absent.

So life is one continuous chain on unending chores - big and small.

But I doubt whether it will lead to a divorce.

Women can scold the men in an undertone since they cant hear that any way and go on with life as usual.

Blessings in disguise!?:rolleyes:
with warm regards,
Mrs. V.R.
 
dear Mr. sangom,
I want to know how the husband made good money through his good looking wife and whether it precipitated the separation.
If it is alright to reveal it, please do so.
with warm regards,
Mrs.V.R.

VR,

In that case the moment the wife came to know (let me say 'smell') the mind of her husband, she left, being a gutsy north Indian woman. So his plans were on paper (in his mind only). Naturally, he was distraught. But most people around knew something was wrong with him, otherwise that wife who had tolerated him so long would not have left like that. Some time later that woman wrote a letter to one of her close friends and, as you know, that was public knowledge in short time!

In another case I have heard of, both the husband who had probably some personal handicap and the (good-looking) wife both agreed and they probably got many benefits by that sort of cooperative enterprise catering to very select and highly influential clientele. This too was not tabra, btw.
 
Dear madam,

The sani baghavan temple is located around 28 kms. from shirdi (by car about 45 mts journey.). The name of the temple is called sanisingnapur. The god is suyambu saniswaran and looks like a stone which was fallen from heaven. I have visited the god twice in my life. Also if it is possible you can ask him to visit pandaripur which is 6 hours journey from shirdi where you are allowed to bow your head at the feet of lord vittala who is very powerful and listen to our problems.

Regards,

S.Ramanathan
An old sanskrit story comes to my memory.which states that to get a help from GOD you have to put your entire physical efforts and when you feel that you are at the end of the tunnel you will see the ray of hope ie.GOD.Why I am telling this is as refered by Dr.Renu try to get at the root of the problem with the help of a phsychologist and get his advice and simutaneous search for help from the Almighty will auotomaticaly rain his grace.Strong belief in God and parihaarams may not solve problems when you leave everything to him.
 
This is a very important point.Close friends are only hearing one side of the story.
Many so called good people have a dark side no one really knows.I am not saying that this person concern has this but there might be some intimate problems which only a spouse will realize.

Sometimes even a Mr Perfect can be boring to live with and some wives just leave them.
You have to take into account that this person can not get over the past and he might stand the risk of having a too clinging on type of nature which could be bordering into wanting perfection in married life.

I know of a person who didnt have a girlfriend before marriage becos he felt that he will only love a girl after marriage and married a person known to me by arranged marriage.
This guy after marriage asked his wife if she had a boyfriend before and when she said yes that was it..he became extremely depressed and started to become suspicious also cos he felt his dream had crumbled.He eventually ruined the marriage.

Some men build castles in the air about married life and when this prefect dream doesnt materialize things can take a different turn and they can make life of others hell.
A person does not have to be violent to be abusive..even a passive person can drive anyone up the wall.

Its always better to listen to both sides of the story.

Another factor all of us here are not considering is sexual preformance of both partners in this case.
Is he having any sexual related problem or is she having any sexual related problem that interferes in the marriage?

From what I see this is a very complex case..please see a good psychiatrist to find out the actual problem besides praying to God for help.
Renu is always right by 100percent.I admire her posts with astonishment about her Knowledge.
 
I am reading all the comments related to my post. Some of posts are really paining my heart/mind. After my careful analysis and observation for the post five years, I have written some qualities my hubby's friend. He is a very good person by heart, conduct, character and behavior . There is no doubt about. If any of the post members saw him definitely will understand my observation.

My hubby called his friend two days back. I have shared some of our thoughts to him. He explained that his wife is well educated and highly lucky (she has sheer luck in all ways). She does not have 0.1 percent of God fearing or good habits. Nobody in their family have conscience and good habit. His wife lived with him 12 years
She did not give a penny of her income to him. Further her brother/sister/mother collected all the money.
He is a hard working very pious person and strictly followed Dharma (as much as possible).
The lady did not like his quality of visiting temple or pious. She used to bring a Singaporean harijan fellow (tamilian) who came from singapore with Chinese lady. It all happened both of them studied in New York state
M.S . After that they went Singapore with a plan that work three years after that go back to Bangalore settle down. Unfortunately he did not get a job (most of the employer told him after interview that he is over qualified for position they are considering, some of them told him to go back to USA). So he left his wife 6 months (with her full consent) went to India and tried for a job. During the period he had affair with harijan
fellow (at that time harijan fellow did not married). She try to divorce him, but he fought with the help of his relatives and got her back. He came back to Singapore, to vacate the home. His past employer in USA called him back, so he went back. His wife father (who did all 'akramam') died due to cancer within three months after the incidence. Hubby's friend came to New Jersey and got a consulting job. He continue to work with
the employer. His wife came back and joined with him. Both of them lived another 5 years in USA .
When he came to California, his wife called the singaporean fellow for job. (without his hubby's knowledge
he arranged job for the harijan fellow and got a job with his husband's company) Her husband is workholic person did not know anything except his work. Harijan fellow's wife is a prostitute (chinese), she allowed harijan fellow to visit hubby's friend's house when he is out of home. This lady used to make dosa and serve him when he is out of home. Also she used to go walking with him. All this uncharacteristic activities, he contacted her brother/mother . They told him to keep silent, because she has sada sathi (71/2 sani etc).
The lady did so many things against hubby's knowledge. He is man of patience and prayed God for help.
In 2009, she had taken her things when hubby's friend went Temple, on Saturday. When he came back around 4 pm , he found that door was kept open some items were stolen. He went to neighbours house and called their help. Neighbouring telugu fellow told that this lady with the help of Harijan fellow taken items and gone
to live another apartment. Prior to moving out, she change the lease to her husband's name. After two weeks
she went to family court. My husband's friend never participated any court trial in USA. It is very expensive to hire an attorney here. So he went to Bangalore and contacted four diff. lawyers. All of them told him that the divorce judgement is null and void and it is not enforceable in India. Because this particular trial is properly conducted further he never participated and it is similar expartee judgement. He did not have job in India, all lawyer's gave him a good advice that do not go to court. Go to astrologer/temple and find a solution for this.

My hubby's friend told us both of them have many similar qualities, but her wife did not like temple/dharma etc.
He further told us that, the lady's character can be correctable/change able, but her brother/sister/mother all
are conspiring in her life. Even though she is educated, she does not lack analytical ability and trust bad people. Her brother/sister/mother/father (when he is alive) all of them sucking her money. Her brother's want to sell this lady for the sake money and make money out of her. Her brother/sister/mother did not bother about
her life.

After the separation, harijan fellow's wife told hubby's wife not to come to their home. She had one blackish kid from the harijan fellow. She was afraid that if this lady may break her life and she does not have any job , she may be in the road. So their friendship broken. This lady tried to lure another north indian fellow for few months which did not work out. Later she tried with another chinese fellow , he cheated her after having affair with her. Later she was running behind an american.... My hubby's friend wept...relentlessly after pouring his
heart...

I cannot write more than this. I will say God does not exists in this world. As a woman, i will say no word
will describe his sufferings. Once again, no kind hearted woman will justify this lady's action/character correct.
Due to his age, family tradition and good qualities (Dharma) he feels that God should correct her and back her to his life.

I will say finally ' My hubby's friend is a great personality and good person, no doubt about'. God punishes good
people...that's what hub...friend says...

Sujatha
 
I forgot to add one more point, all this problems are due to her continuous earnings. hubby's friend told us that (he knows astrology) saturn is well placed from rasi (kumbha ) sixth house , it is an excellent combination for earning/job/windfall luck etc. If anyone make her unemployed , she will definitely back to him. Because her family member's are only for his money, once the money is stopped she will be back. He cannot get married again and no one will marry him . I will also support his veiws, that good people will think this way...
Sujatha
 
I am reading all the comments related to my post. Some of posts are really paining my heart/mind. After my careful analysis and observation for the post five years, I have written some qualities my hubby's friend. He is a very good person by heart, conduct, character and behavior . There is no doubt about. If any of the post members saw him definitely will understand my observation.

My hubby called his friend two days back. I have shared some of our thoughts to him. He explained that his wife is well educated and highly lucky (she has sheer luck in all ways). She does not have 0.1 percent of God fearing or good habits. Nobody in their family have conscience and good habit. His wife lived with him 12 years
She did not give a penny of her income to him. Further her brother/sister/mother collected all the money.
He is a hard working very pious person and strictly followed Dharma (as much as possible).
The lady did not like his quality of visiting temple or pious. She used to bring a Singaporean harijan fellow (tamilian) who came from singapore with Chinese lady. It all happened both of them studied in New York state
M.S . After that they went Singapore with a plan that work three years after that go back to Bangalore settle down. Unfortunately he did not get a job (most of the employer told him after interview that he is over qualified for position they are considering, some of them told him to go back to USA). So he left his wife 6 months (with her full consent) went to India and tried for a job. During the period he had affair with harijan
fellow (at that time harijan fellow did not married). She try to divorce him, but he fought with the help of his relatives and got her back. He came back to Singapore, to vacate the home. His past employer in USA called him back, so he went back. His wife father (who did all 'akramam') died due to cancer within three months after the incidence. Hubby's friend came to New Jersey and got a consulting job. He continue to work with
the employer. His wife came back and joined with him. Both of them lived another 5 years in USA .
When he came to California, his wife called the singaporean fellow for job. (without his hubby's knowledge
he arranged job for the harijan fellow and got a job with his husband's company) Her husband is workholic person did not know anything except his work. Harijan fellow's wife is a prostitute (chinese), she allowed harijan fellow to visit hubby's friend's house when he is out of home. This lady used to make dosa and serve him when he is out of home. Also she used to go walking with him. All this uncharacteristic activities, he contacted her brother/mother . They told him to keep silent, because she has sada sathi (71/2 sani etc).
The lady did so many things against hubby's knowledge. He is man of patience and prayed God for help.
In 2009, she had taken her things when hubby's friend went Temple, on Saturday. When he came back around 4 pm , he found that door was kept open some items were stolen. He went to neighbours house and called their help. Neighbouring telugu fellow told that this lady with the help of Harijan fellow taken items and gone
to live another apartment. Prior to moving out, she change the lease to her husband's name. After two weeks
she went to family court. My husband's friend never participated any court trial in USA. It is very expensive to hire an attorney here. So he went to Bangalore and contacted four diff. lawyers. All of them told him that the divorce judgement is null and void and it is not enforceable in India. Because this particular trial is properly conducted further he never participated and it is similar expartee judgement. He did not have job in India, all lawyer's gave him a good advice that do not go to court. Go to astrologer/temple and find a solution for this.

My hubby's friend told us both of them have many similar qualities, but her wife did not like temple/dharma etc.
He further told us that, the lady's character can be correctable/change able, but her brother/sister/mother all
are conspiring in her life. Even though she is educated, she does not lack analytical ability and trust bad people. Her brother/sister/mother/father (when he is alive) all of them sucking her money. Her brother's want to sell this lady for the sake money and make money out of her. Her brother/sister/mother did not bother about
her life.

After the separation, harijan fellow's wife told hubby's wife not to come to their home. She had one blackish kid from the harijan fellow. She was afraid that if this lady may break her life and she does not have any job , she may be in the road. So their friendship broken. This lady tried to lure another north indian fellow for few months which did not work out. Later she tried with another chinese fellow , he cheated her after having affair with her. Later she was running behind an american.... My hubby's friend wept...relentlessly after pouring his
heart...

I cannot write more than this. I will say God does not exists in this world. As a woman, i will say no word
will describe his sufferings. Once again, no kind hearted woman will justify this lady's action/character correct.
Due to his age, family tradition and good qualities (Dharma) he feels that God should correct her and back her to his life.

I will say finally ' My hubby's friend is a great personality and good person, no doubt about'. God punishes good
people...that's what hub...friend says...

Sujatha


Dear Sujatha,

You say you feel pain to read some of the post here but I am pained to read some words in your post too.

Harijan fellow,
Chinese prostitute
Blackish kid.

BTW if the lady is as "bad" as you portray..why does he want her back?
I am surprised that she has had an affair and also had a kid with another man and your hubby's friend wants her back?
Something fishy here.
Is it becos she is lucky as you said she has luck for everything.
If thats the case I hope she finally settles down with a man who really loves her be it Harijan or TB or Chinese or from Timbaktu
 
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Hi Sujatha,

I suspected the OP from the affected person himself and mentioned in an earlier post. May be, you felt hurt by that too!!

BTW, I also have the same question that Renu asked. Why that 'bad' lady is wanted back by your hubby's friend? Does he want

to get her earnings for a comfortable living? And, he wishes to make her unemployed! In that case, how will he support her

without a proper placement for himself? You are confusing the members of the forum more and more, Sujatha!
 
The entire affair seems to be much more complicated. This may need expert advise to solve.
Brahmanyan,
Bangalore.
 
It is just "Prarabtha Karma" of this man; may be he would have tortured his spouse in one, of his previous birth!! If there is no solution ; try this karma theory move on!!
 
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Dear Sujatha,

I know you might not like what I am going to say(I hope I am wrong and apologize in advance if I am wrong) but please hear me out.

I am starting to doubt if you are really Sujatha or the Victim himself.
Cos the info you are giving is very very detail and its impossible that your husband's friend who is a man is telling you such details.

If you are getting to know this from your hubby that is your husband's friend tells him.Ok let me give your hubby's friend a name.lets call him Mr X.
Ok if Mr X is telling your hubby all these I find it hard to believe that your hubby will remember this detail cos as a doc I know that men dont pay too much to minute details.

A man is never going to hear out another male till this level.
I am sure even your husband is never going to remember every bit to regurgitate to you.

I highly suspect you are Mr X yourself.
Ok pay close attention to what I am going to say..this only applies if you are
Mr X.

May be Mr X's wife could have had an affair after 12 years of marriage for whatever reason since in the post above it does say she had an affair and also had a kid with the Non Brahmin guy from Singapore.

That shattered the life of Mr X both mentally and physically and he could not concentrate on work and hence has no steady job.
Some men do not let go of the past but want to get even and will do anything to get back the spouse and torture her or even resort to getting rid of her from the surface of this world.

No right thinking man will want back a wife who has had multiple affairs and a kid from another guy.
And why did Mr X even arrange for the NB Singaporean to get a job in USA when he knew very well that NB Singaporean guy had an affair with his wife?
Doesn't make sense right?
Unless Mr X has been deeply psychologically affected that he wants to deal with both of them in his own way.

So Mr X comes online in forum here hoping to get some info on how to do some pooja so that he can get his wife back and deal with her.
The post today did say he wants her to stop earning and if someone can do that she will come back to him.
Why???When Mr X has no steady job himself.

I had mentioned once before in forum that some people love their spouses some much that they actually want them dead.
Till Death Do Us Part.

I have no idea if Mr X falls in that category but I am starting to get suspicious.

If you are really Mr X please let go of the past and see a psychiatrist and let by gones be bygones.
Sometimes affairs do happen..most women have affairs for emotional support and rarely for sex.
May be the emotional connection was lacking in the marriage and that lead the wife to so call stray.

If you are not Mr X and actually Sujatha then ignore this post and I am sorry if I hurt your feelings.

I request other members not to give opinions on my post cos I dont want to hurt anyones feelings here but I wrote this out of good wil cos if its really Mr X..i hope he changes his mind after reading what I wrote.

My post here is purely a professional point of view.I might be wrong.I dont really know for sure.
 
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one may be hurt, but that is no excuse to denigrate other races and communities.

scoundrels are there everywhere, and from sujatha's note, she appears to be strongly prejudiced against chinese, harijans, dark people and i dont know what else.

her husband's apparently follows the hindu dharma, whenever he can. that would describe all of us too.

all in all, it felt, like reading the script of a soap opera, except the whole post could be stretched over 52 episodes.

at the end of her last post, not sure, what sujatha wants. a little more humility, a little less racism and above all, clarity in the post, would go a long way, in understanding the context of it all.
 
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