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How to help each other

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vgane

Well-known member
When we render help to some one we expect something in return...But my own experience is that whenever I help somebody then it is not that person (who is the Recipent) who returns the favor...I get help from somebody else...By putting others first (can be friends, relatives or any other person needing help) as a Donor it gives me innate joy & happiness..This makes me feel that my act of kindness that is being reciprocated by another person is an act of God...

Though I have opened a separate thread on How to be Happy, I feel this thread could focus on how each one of us can help others who are in dire need
 
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Visalakshi Ramani

Well-known member
When we receive an act of kindness...
we should pass it on to the others.

This chain reaction will change the attitudes
and lives of everyone linked by the chain.

A good deed NEVER goes in waste.

Help someone and you yourself will get help from the most unexpected and unknown quarters.

Nature restores what is given willingly
AND TAKES BY FORCE WHAT IS withheld nastily.

Nature is a great equalizer.
 
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renuka

Well-known member
I set aside some time for simple things in life to make others happy.

When I drive to work at least once a day I let some other driver who is waiting to make a turn go first even though it might be actually my turn.
The person smiles and waves thank you to you and you smile back to him or her.
So good way to start the day with a smile.
 

Iyyarooraan

Well-known member
The biggest help you can render to others is just listening to them; in some cases non-interference is bigger than the biggest help you can 'render' to them!
 

Visalakshi Ramani

Well-known member
Yes being a good listener - without interfering - is real tough.:ear:

Either your concentration drifts away or :loco:

you will disturb the flow of thoughts of the speaker :blabla:

or you just fall asleep trying to listen and keep silent. :sleep:

The biggest help you can render to others is just listening to them; in some cases non-interference is bigger than the biggest help you can 'render' to them!
 

nalanda

Member
Help is a funny old thing; help too much you may come across as overbearing or a killjoy or patronising.Look at relionships between the parent and the adolescent or adult son/ daughter.Sometimes you help a person and listen to them offloading about their worries and as in counselling; you ask the right question at the right time to enable the person to reflect on the answers and come up with an answer.Then they say to you, it was nice chatting but I must get back to something else, not realising you have just helped them and they do not even know about it.I feel the main thing in helping is making sure that freewill stays in the mind of the helper at all times.
nalanda
 

renuka

Well-known member
The biggest help you can render to others is just listening to them; in some cases non-interference is bigger than the biggest help you can 'render' to them!

And even better just fake that you are listening when the story goes on and on and on and on and on....
use words like 'oh really?'
'thats sad..thats too bad..'
'don't worry..everything will be fine'

Sometimes we cant listen too much too..we will go nuts.
 

Raji Ram

Well-known member
..........
use words like 'oh really?'
'thats sad..thats too bad..'
'don't worry..everything will be fine' .........
Most important: At the right time!! :blah:

Suppose the second story starts like,'My sister came home to help me!'

and the listener says, 'Thats sad, thats too bad!', then?? :D


 

renuka

Well-known member
Most important: At the right time!! :blah:

Suppose the second story starts like,'My sister came home to help me!'

and the listener says, 'Thats sad, thats too bad!', then?? :D



Then use the last line on yourself ..tell your self "Dont worry everything will be fine"!!LOL
 

Visalakshi Ramani

Well-known member
The human psychology revealed in this post:
Only a sister will come forward to
help another sister in need!
Yet sisters are considered by sisters as
head-aches, or neck-pain! How very :cool:?

Most important: At the right time!! :blah:

Suppose the second story starts like,'My sister came home to help me!'

and the listener says, 'Thats sad, thats too bad!', then?? :D


 

renuka

Well-known member
The human psychology revealed in this post:
Only a sister will come forward to
help another sister in need!
Yet sisters are considered by sisters as
head-aches, or neck-pain! How very :cool:?


Dear VR Ji and RR Ji,

I have a question for both of you.How is the sister-sister relationship cos I have 2 brothers and dont have a sister.

How do sisters feel towards each other?

How do they love each other?

You see with my brothers its a nice relationship cos I behave like a guy with them both.
I can talk the way I want cos guys dont bear grudges as much as girls do and guys are more open in nature.

So can you both explain how sisterly love works?
 
OP
OP
V

vgane

Well-known member
The biggest help you can render to others is just listening to them; in some cases non-interference is bigger than the biggest help you can 'render' to them!

Lack of listening is the cause of the communication break down in most families...When we do not listen our mind is switched off & we do not respond to the other person appropriately...The problem takes a ugly turn when we become obstinate & repeat our earlier statements without bothering to check what the recipient of the communication is saying...For effective listening one has to improve concentration, tolerance & sensitivity...In case of stress listening gets hampered..Also while listening we should not speak, but rather display the appropriate body language that empathize with the person..
Listening is a big stress buster...When you have a companion with whom you are able to share & that person is an excellent listener then one experiences a big relief
 

Visalakshi Ramani

Well-known member
Dear VR Ji and RR Ji,

I have a question for both of you.How is the sister-sister relationship cos I have 2 brothers and dont have a sister.

How do sisters feel towards each other?

How do they love each other?

You see with my brothers its a nice relationship cos I behave like a guy with them both.
I can talk the way I want cos guys dont bear grudges as much as girls do and guys are more open in nature.

So can you both explain how sisterly love works?

The answer lies in your question itself.
It is a complicated love - hate - relationship
with a lot of jealousy thrown in for the pep.
 

Raji Ram

Well-known member
The guys who enter the lives of sisters are the main reason for jealousy among sisters!

Their look, status, family, education, age and so many other aspects vary and create problems.

In a family known to me, one sister treats her siblings as her offsprings. She presented huge amount of money

to them after selling her house, just to show her love. When some accepted it happily, one of the sisters was forced

to part with it, just because her be(bi)tter half hated the sister who gave the gift!

Such episodes happen in many families! Really bad and sad!! :pout:
 
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Visalakshi Ramani

Well-known member
Love - hate realtionship is by itself quite complicated. :whoo:

The love - hate relationships of their spouses :caked:
(the co-brothers) magnifies even small differences. :croc:

Really women lose control over their lives, their feelings and their relationships after their wedding.

If the only choice allowed is, "My way or the highway!"
then it has reached a dead end already!!!
:doh:
 

Iyyarooraan

Well-known member
இடம், பொருள், ஏவல், தெரிந்து நடந்துகொள்ளவேண்டும்.
 

Visalakshi Ramani

Well-known member
உரலுக்கு ஒரு பக்கம் இடி.
பெண்களுக்கு இரண்டு பக்கமும் இடி.

பிறந்த வீட்டைச் சுட்டிக்காட்டி இங்கும்
புகுந்த வீட்டைச் சுட்டிக்காட்டி அங்கும்

ஏராளமான தாராளமான இடிகள் கிடைக்கும்.
ஒவ்வொரு பெண்ணும் ஒரு இடிதாங்கி! :tape:

அதிலும்

எளியவன் பெண்டாட்டி :whip:
எல்லோருக்கும் மச்சினி! :hail:



Dear VR Ji and RR Ji,

Thank you for reply..sounds scary though.
 

BostonSankara

New member
Hahahaha! You are too funny! This totally made me laugh out loud. Thanks for that!

And even better just fake that you are listening when the story goes on and on and on and on and on....
use words like 'oh really?'
'thats sad..thats too bad..'
'don't worry..everything will be fine'

Sometimes we cant listen too much too..we will go nuts.
 

Iyyarooraan

Well-known member
உரலுக்கு ஒரு பக்கம் இடி.
பெண்களுக்கு இரண்டு பக்கமும் இடி.

பிறந்த வீட்டைச் சுட்டிக்காட்டி இங்கும்
புகுந்த வீட்டைச் சுட்டிக்காட்டி அங்கும்

ஏராளமான தாராளமான இடிகள் கிடைக்கும்.
ஒவ்வொரு பெண்ணும் ஒரு இடிதாங்கி! :tape:

அதிலும்

எளியவன் பெண்டாட்டி :whip:
எல்லோருக்கும் மச்சினி! :hail:
புகுந்த வீட்டிலிருந்தும் பிறந்தவீட்டிலிரிந்தும் பெற்றுக்கொள்ளும் பெண்களும் உண்டு. இந்தகாலத்தில் இரண்டுபக்கத்தையும் இடிக்கும் பெண்கள் ஏராளம்.இயற்கையில் ஆணுக்கும் பெண்ணுக்கும் வித்தியாசம் இல்லை. இருவரும் ஒருவரை ஒருவர் நிறைவு செய்கிறார்கள். எப்படித்தான் இந்த பிளவு வந்ததோ? ஆண்டவரே உமக்குத்தெரியுமா?
 
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