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Guardian angels for senior citzens

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we are not courageous all the time . the best of us are afraid of the unknown and what will happen to us in our evening years.
the unknown is a constant challenge and is a part of living.
many specially senior citizen have developed the habit of talking to themselves to overcome the fear of what future holds for them. most might think , there goes the oldie who talks to himself on the roads . many might think, this guy has gone crazy.
Actually this is good. talk to oneself . this might actually give you the power and generate an inner force that will help cope and overcome the problems of old age and its insecurities. you will also reason out the way to surmount the obstacles that need to be surmounted,
we learn lessons from defeats in our life and prepare ourselves also for victories that will be part our balance life
I also talk to myself when i am alone. know all ,you are never alone when you do this . there are many guardian angels who are listening to us and helping us to reflect .
There are many such angels [ not ladies alone -not gender specific] even in his forum who keep listening and they will come out at appropriate time and take us out of our miseries.
How do you like this post .? these are ramblings of a self talking senior citizen on a sunday morning

One does not have to be an oldie to talk to one's own self.

I used to do that when I was a kid and when I was alone in my room and once my mum caught me talking to myself..I used to love talking to myself and also kiss the mirror!LOL

Well even now I talk to myself and sometimes I scold myself too.

If I did something stupid I will tell myself 'you dumb female! dont you have brains?"

But sometimes this becomes a habit and we might not realize that we talk to ourselves while shopping etc.

Its just our own thoughts that so happened get vocalized..once during shopping I was asking myself "should I buy this or buy that" and then some onlookers were wondering who I was talking too..but who cares!LOL

If anyone asks me I will tell them I was talking to the sales girl..let them panic thinking some ghost is there! ha ha ha

Well I like your post cos I thought I was the only crazy one..looks as if you are as crazy as me!LOL
 
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krish Sir

I would rate Raji Madam and renukaji as the Angels of this Forum; Time and again they have come out with practical advice to me on matters concerning my personal life!!



Dear PJ sir,

Many a times the advise RR ji and I give you is totally the opposite like night and day..and you too know that very well that me and RR ji are as different as the North Pole and the South Pole(I am using North and South Pole here cos you have given me and RR ji lots of Ice!LOL)


I think when you read totally opposite advice from me and RR ji....you start to wonder "what should I do...both give such different advise." then you read both and you make your final decision.

So that way RR ji is the Angel and I am the Devil!LOL


angel-and-devil-doodle.png
 
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.In fact I never took any calls after 9 pm or before 6 am even when it happens to be official . I do not allow its intrusion in home life. Even directors of my company got their calls rejected by my wife since they violated my curfew hours.


I know many people who do this but I have never ever rejected any phone call from anyone no matter what ever time at night cos sometimes we never know who might be calling us for what..(but my patients dont have my handphone number..only the female patients I know very well have the number..once I had given it to a male patient and god knows who he gave it to and I was getting I Love You calls at night!LOL so after that no more giving numbers to male patients)

My husband has to have the same habit like yours of not answering phone after he comes home from office.. but I would answer his phone and give him the phone to speak to whoever is calling him.I never ask who is speaking cos I dont want to sound like a busy body and I just tell them..."just a second he is here..let me pass the phone to him"..my husband gets pissed with this!LOL.Now he answers all calls!

I tell my husband no matter who it is always answer all calls.....cos it could be your boss or even some unknown person who might need your help...no matter what time of the day or night it is...answer your calls.

I myself value my privacy but when the phone rings I always answer it ..
.sometimes my staff call me at the middle of the night saying they might not be able to come to work cos of an emergency or need leave cos of some relative is sick or someone died etc.


I even reply unknown sms sent to me wrongly telling them 'you have wrongly sent me this sms..i am not the intended recipient..please send your sms again to your intended recipient to avoid any problem on your side"
 
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I know many people who do this but I have never ever rejected any phone call from anyone no matter what ever time at night cos sometimes we never know who might be calling us for what..(but my patients dont have my handphone number..only the female patients I know very well have the number..once I had given it to a male patient and god knows who he gave it to and I was getting I Love You calls at night!LOL so after that no more giving numbers to male patients)

My husband has to have the same habit like yours of not answering phone after he comes home from office.. but I would answer his phone and give him the phone to speak to whoever is calling him.I never ask who is speaking cos I dont want to sound like a busy body and I just tell them..."just a second he is here..let me pass the phone to him"..my husband gets pissed with this!LOL.Now he answers all calls!

I tell my husband no matter who it is always answer all calls.....cos it could be your boss or even some unknown person who might need your help...no matter what time of the day or night it is...answer your calls.

I myself value my privacy but when the phone rings I always answer it ..
.sometimes my staff call me at the middle of the night saying they might not be able to come to work cos of an emergency or need leave cos of some relative is sick or someone died etc.


I even reply unknown sms sent to me wrongly telling them 'you have wrongly sent me this sms..i am not the intended recipient..please send your sms again to your intended recipient to avoid any problem on your side"
renukaji
we have led high pressure lives .we are not in medical profession . mostly some office calls which can very well wait overnight. many ring up to

discuss office politics one likes to escape from after office hours .then it becomes a habit you bring office home.

similarly , my wife had never allowed any official work to come in the way of making breakfast for my children while they were in school.

once she had to pick up a high dignitary [ a well known tamil brahmin election commissioner ] for inaugurating an international conference. my

wife was thrust with the job as she was tamil. since she had to prepare breakfast for her children before going for pick up , she got delayed . she decided not to

pick up frantic calls . she delayed the inauguration by 45 minutes as she went with the man late in heavy traffic with siren blaring . all foreign

guests had to wait since my kids had to be given breakfast for school. I thought it was carrying things too far.However thats how we function .

Home is our first priority . heavens may crash.home time nobody can ask for and get time reserved for home .


even funerals , I have kept cool as nothing can be done with the dead after 9 pm. also once one is dead there can be emotion but no activity at night .
time management is a must in modern times , time is of essence ,it can not be bartered away to suit people who do not manage efficiently

their own time and create crisis for others.
 
Dear PJ sir,

Many a times the advise RR ji and I give you is totally the opposite like night and day..and you too know that very well that me and RR ji are as different as the North Pole and the South Pole(I am using North and South Pole here cos you have given me and RR ji lots of Ice!LOL)


I think when you read totally opposite advice from me and RR ji....you start to wonder "what should I do...both give such different advise." then you read both and you make your final decision.

So that way RR ji is the Angel and I am the Devil .lol

angel-and-devil-doodle.png
Both of you are angels
one is the conservative voice urging restraint and following the safe right and moral route

the other is the voice giving a view based on scientific thinking and suggesting a path based on cold reasoning.

what path people take is based on what appeals to them . many who are in dark get to know the options that exist to make an informed choice
As a team you are unbeatable .
 
renukaji
we have led high pressure lives .we are not in medical profession . mostly some office calls which can very well wait overnight. many ring up to

discuss office politics one likes to escape from after office hours .then it becomes a habit you bring office home.

similarly , my wife had never allowed any official work to come in the way of making breakfast for my children while they were in school.

once she had to pick up a high dignitary [ a well known tamil brahmin election commissioner ] for inaugurating an international conference. my

wife was thrust with the job as she was tamil. since she had to prepare breakfast for her children before going for pick up , she got delayed . she decided not to

pick up frantic calls . she delayed the inauguration by 45 minutes as she went with the man late in heavy traffic with siren blaring . all foreign

guests had to wait since my kids had to be given breakfast for school. I thought it was carrying things too far.However thats how we function .

Home is our first priority . heavens may crash.home time nobody can ask for and get time reserved for home .


even funerals , I have kept cool as nothing can be done with the dead after 9 pm. also once one is dead there can be emotion but no activity at night .
time management is a must in modern times , time is of essence ,it can not be bartered away to suit people who do not manage efficiently

their own time and create crisis for others.


I think differently.

I am sure no one will call after office hours unless its urgent so any urgent call has to be attended to.

BTW I know a few people who do not answer calls once they are home and I usually delete such people from my phone list and have very little to do with them.

I believe in balancing any act..to be a responsible person for all my actions be it family or work.

In my whole life I have never kept anyone waiting for me even once. I am the one always in the car first before my husband..I get ready faster than him!LOL

Even when I was a doctor in the government hospital our work starts at 8 am at the wards and then go to the out patient department after we finish ward rounds and patient would be waiting for us to come from our ward rounds.Out patient also opens at 8am.

So I used to start work at 7 am (1 hour earlier) so that I would finish my ward rounds by 8 am and see the outpatient patients right away. Other doctors used to tell me "you are stupid to be working 1 hour earlier without being paid for it..but I did not care.

I hate to keep anyone waiting and I hate waiting too!LOL

Once I had gone to a temple to ask about a pooja and the priest told me to come for the pooja at 6pm the next day.

So I was at the temple at 5.30pm itself the next day and the priest told me that the Pooja actually starts at 7pm!

I was what?? Then why did you tell me 6pm?

He said he did not expect me to keep time..most people come late so he said 6pm hoping I will come at 7pm.

So I went back for a while to my home and came back later..I was kind of pissed that he wasted my 1 hour.

So looks like it Krish we are totally different.

I know family is also important..that is why I never neglect work or family but I am still practical.
 
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One does not have to be an oldie to talk to one's own self.

I used to do that when I was a kid and when I was alone in my room and once my mum caught me talking to myself..I used to love talking to myself and also kiss the mirror!LOL

Well even now I talk to myself and sometimes I scold myself too.

If I did something stupid I will tell myself 'you dumb female! dont you have brains?"

But sometimes this becomes a habit and we might not realize that we talk to ourselves while shopping etc.

Its just our own thoughts that so happened get vocalized..once during shopping I was asking myself "should I buy this or buy that" and then some onlookers were wondering who I was talking too..but who cares!LOL

If anyone asks me I will tell them I was talking to the sales girl..let them panic thinking some ghost is there! ha ha ha

Well I like your post cos I thought I was the only crazy one..looks as if you are as crazy as me!LOL
next time you talk to yourself imagine an angel next to you holding your hand . you will feel empowered . you can even imagine a male macho angel . lol
 
next time you talk to yourself imagine an angel next to you holding your hand . you will feel empowered . you can even imagine a male macho angel . lol

All macho guys are in hell! so I prefer holding the hand of a macho fallen angel!LOL
 
Dear PJ sir,

Many a times the advise RR ji and I give you is totally the opposite like night and day..and you too know that very well that me and RR ji are as different as the North Pole and the South Pole(I am using North and South Pole here cos you have given me and RR ji lots of Ice!LOL)


I think when you read totally opposite advice from me and RR ji....you start to wonder "what should I do...both give such different advise." then you read both and you make your final decision.

So that way RR ji is the Angel and I am the Devil!LOL


angel-and-devil-doodle.png


Dear renukaji

Even if you both give different advises, you both give it with at most sincerity
 
I think differently.

I am sure no one will call after office hours unless its urgent so any urgent call has to be attended to.

BTW I know a few people who do not answer calls once they are home and I usually delete such people from my phone list and have very little to do with them.

I believe in balancing any act..to be a responsible person for all my actions be it family or work.

In my whole life I have never kept anyone waiting for me even once. I am the one always in the car first before my husband..I get ready faster than him!LOL

Even when I was a doctor in the government hospital our work starts at 8 am at the wards and then go to the out patient department after we finish ward rounds and patient would be waiting for us to come from our ward rounds.Out patient also opens at 8am.

So I used to start work at 7 am (1 hour earlier) so that I would finish my ward rounds by 8 am and see the outpatient patients right away. Other doctors used to tell me "you are stupid to be working 1 hour earlier without being paid for it..but I did not care.

I hate to keep anyone waiting and I hate waiting too!LOL

Once I had gone to a temple to ask about a pooja and the priest told me to come for the pooja at 6pm the next day.

So I was at the temple at 5.30pm itself the next day and the priest told me that the Pooja actually starts at 7pm!

I was what?? Then why did you tell me 6pm?

He said he did not expect me to keep time..most people come late so he said 6pm hoping I will come at 7pm.

So I went back for a while to my home and came back later..I was kind of pissed that he wasted my 1 hour.

So looks like it Krish we are totally different.

I know family is also important..that is why I never neglect work or family but I am still practical.
well I will tell you two experiences
1. once a director called me late night to trace my namesake in the company.he felt I should get him that fellows contact details since he had my name. his logic both madrasis possibly hanging together. so I told him I do not know and banged the phone
2.another time a colleague disturbed to talk about office politics at 10 at night
like this when you get frivolous calls , it is best to switch off.
I do not think I am that important to be disturbed late night.
 
well I will tell you two experiences
1. once a director called me late night to trace my namesake in the company.he felt I should get him that fellows contact details since he had my name. his logic both madrasis possibly hanging together. so I told him I do not know and banged the phone
2.another time a colleague disturbed to talk about office politics at 10 at night
like this when you get frivolous calls , it is best to switch off.
I do not think I am that important to be disturbed late night.


For situation number 2 I can understand but for situation number 1 if I were you I would have spoken cos the reputation of your company is at stake if you dont reply.

If I were you I would have said.."Ok will let you know in the morning"


Just be diplomatic yaar.


I have had a friend call me from some other country just to complain about his wife!LOL

It was some 4 am for me when the call woke me and I told him "hey do you know what time it is here?"

But he said "please please listen..I need to talk to someone"

So I listen to his trivial insignificant problem..but since he is a friend I felt i needed to hear him out.

BTW I never switch my phone off.

I even take it to the bathroom cos I dont want to miss any calls.

You never know who calls for what...once I had a call at 2 am that some relative had passed away..so I got up and got ready to drive to the place cos that was in another state some 4 hours away.

My husband used to have the habit of not answering any unknown numbers that call him.

Once I told him never do this cos just imagine any loved one is in an accident and is their mobile phone is damaged and they use someone elses phone to call for help..and imagine you dont pick up?

I think of all possible worst case scenarios and I answer every call.

You really dont lose anything yaar.
 
I pick up the calls from unknown numbers too! Never take any risk of missing some important info, right?

The recent one on my mobile made me :lol: ! It started, 'vaNakkam! nAn ungaL sahodhari Jayalalitha pEsugirEn!'

Of course, I did not let her finish her :blabla: ..........

P.S: Renu and I have a few similar views too! :becky:
 
I pick up the calls from unknown numbers too! Never take any risk of missing some important info, right?

The recent one on my mobile made me :lol: ! It started, 'vaNakkam! nAn ungaL sahodhari Jayalalitha pEsugirEn!'

Of course, I did not let her finish her :blabla: ..........

P.S: Renu and I have a few similar views too! :becky:


Dear RR ji,

Sometimes its also fun.

Cos some people will go on talking as if they are so sure its the right number!LOL


But you are right..never take the risk of missing some important info.

You know when I was newly married and I was at my in laws house..their house phone was ringing non stop and no one bothered to pick it up!My Brother In law or husband too were not bothered.

I was totally shocked and I asked my inlaws.."what if that was an important call?"

Then my FIL replied.."if it is important the person will call again"

I was "OMG how can you guys be like this" and then whenever I was there I used to answer all calls for them..after that they started taking their phone calls more seriously!LOL
 
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why don't you allow the calls from unknown numbers to go to Voice message ?

We do it here, and if the call is from the known person, we either pick it up when caller is giving the message, or if we we are not at home, we call them back.

Unknown persons never gives messages. Many sales callers can be avoided this way.
 
For situation number 2 I can understand but for situation number 1 if I were you I would have spoken cos the reputation of your company is at stake if you dont reply.

If I were you I would have said.."Ok will let you know in the morning"


Just be diplomatic yaar.


I have had a friend call me from some other country just to complain about his wife!LOL

It was some 4 am for me when the call woke me and I told him "hey do you know what time it is here?"

But he said "please please listen..I need to talk to someone"

So I listen to his trivial insignificant problem..but since he is a friend I felt i needed to hear him out.

BTW I never switch my phone off.

I even take it to the bathroom cos I dont want to miss any calls.

You never know who calls for what...once I had a call at 2 am that some relative had passed away..so I got up and got ready to drive to the place cos that was in another state some 4 hours away.

My husband used to have the habit of not answering any unknown numbers that call him.

Once I told him never do this cos just imagine any loved one is in an accident and is their mobile phone is damaged and they use someone elses phone to call for help..and imagine you dont pick up?

I think of all possible worst case scenarios and I answer every call.

You really dont lose anything yaar.
I do not agree you lose nothing . you minimally lose your sleep .

secondly somebody stereotyping me and imagining I will have a relationship with someone

carrying my name shows he thinks either first names are surnames or all madrasis are blood

brothers . third , he even expected that , I should find my namesakes telephone number and tell

him spoiling my sleep .some guys start treating their subordinates like domestic servant .

this is the typical punjabi mindset . they feel they are rulers everywhere and others should run around for them.
I have not made my career based on diplomacy. if a price needs to be paid for it so be it.

BTW I did not pay a price . only got dirty looks and he sulked and refused to acknowledge I existed for sometime
I have a way of tackling this important call issue . I have an unlisted number belonging To VIP

quota[ Do not ask me how I got it]. This is never out of action as it is serviced on priority basis

when it goes out of order . I have given the number to a small number of close people I really care for to call

me on total emergencies after 9pm or anytime during the day.. It may ring a few times in a

week during days and rarely at night .

other phones and mobiles , curfew hours apply
 
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why don't you allow the calls from unknown numbers to go to Voice message ?

We do it here, and if the call is from the known person, we either pick it up when caller is giving the message, or if we we are not at home, we call them back.

Unknown persons never gives messages. Many sales callers can be avoided this way.
In india for mobiles there is a do not call registry . I have listed there to stop these sales calls. For landlines these do not apply . if we have caller ID we need not pick up unknown numbers .for single ladies these are a must in places in delhi .safe guarding privacy is a must .
 
In india for mobiles there is a do not call registry . I have listed there to stop these sales calls. For landlines these do not apply . if we have caller ID we need not pick up unknown numbers .for single ladies these are a must in places in delhi .safe guarding privacy is a must .

I registered for DNC..Then the messages from my son's School, alerts from Banks stopped...So I had to remove the DNC

But normally for Sales calls I just hang the phone in less than 5 seconds..Had to live with this nuisance
 
The guardian angel who is engaged only for keeping company and not to do any work demands Rs. 6,000 + food. If bedridden

patient is to be taken care of, the demand is 10,000 + food / 5,000 for eating out per month. The angel is kept busy only for

about two hours per day. The rest of the time is for watching TV, taking a nap or chatting on mobile. They hardly talk to the oldie!

The son / daughter has his / her own routine and leaves the patient at the mercy of the angel. Are they really angels? :confused:
 
Raji Madam

When my sister was terminally ill and needed complete care, her family engaged Nurses were paid Rs 600/- per shift of 8 hours.

3 Nurses were doing duty in Shifts , but they were bringing their own food; only Tea or Coffee was given to them 2 times.

The nurse was sitting the same room, but hearing music occasionally from their ipad!!

Generally they were kind, doing their duty without showing any sign of tiredness.
 
The guardian angel who is engaged only for keeping company and not to do any work demands Rs. 6,000 + food. If bedridden

patient is to be taken care of, the demand is 10,000 + food / 5,000 for eating out per month. The angel is kept busy only for

about two hours per day. The rest of the time is for watching TV, taking a nap or chatting on mobile. They hardly talk to the oldie!

The son / daughter has his / her own routine and leaves the patient at the mercy of the angel. Are they really angels? :confused:
I know an angel - a daughter nurse in us folded up and returned to india to look after a bed ridden ailing mother in eighties . since sons in india were not ready to take care , she spent more than a year of her life looking after her mother and went back to US only after her mother passed away . these people are rare to find in modern days.

think what would happen in case even minimal care is not given by children who are busy with their careers.at least some care by a paid care giver is better than no care . .

it is not a money issue for the well off .they probably could do more . the MNC life style is such that you are a 24 hour employee . . it is the price these high earning two income couple pay.

how many of these career ladies give up jobs for raising children. here also they glibly talk of multi tasking and leave them in creche or at the mercy of servants with bad results sometimes

the old should develop more resilience and a fighting spirit to overcome odds .all the time I keep telling seniors to develop the will to move around forcibly and refuse assistance. any dependance is poison .

longevity depend on the will to survive . only the fittest both physically and mentally will play a long innings. other will fall by the wayside and lead a vegetable existence

also keep doing good to as many people as possible from all walks of life and collect some loyalty cheques. hope one ortwo will remember what you did and are available for you.

another stratgey is create living alternatives in a number of metro cities with caregiving and food facilities and nurture them when fit and spend some time in each one every year . might be useful in case you need them .this I am trying out after reading posts in this forum . resorts -buying time shares ,retirement homes - some monthly leases can be added to the kitty . never buy one flat . always two near each other to create back ups. give one free to a relative for looking after you

also keep training domestic servants to become care givers and keep nurturing them for higher responsibilities . it is a worthwhile investment . I have planted such people in my home and in my sons place and deliberately over pay them and try to incorporate them in family . many single/widows are game for it .but one has to shed the hangup about having only brahmin servants . others if they be well dressed and maintain a good level of hygiene should be OK

even after all this preparation if one endsup on the roads it is just bad luck and only a guardian angel can hold your hands
 
......... The nurse was sitting the same room, but hearing music occasionally from their ipad!!

Generally they were kind, doing their duty without showing any sign of tiredness.
Dear P J Sir,

Qualified nurses are duty bound since their salary is high. But, not all the angels sent by some agencies are honest.

My cousin is struggling to take care of his bedridden mom and has changed at least five helpers from one agency, in

the past ten months because of their negligence of duty! :bored:
 
............
1. the old should develop more resilience and a fighting spirit to overcome odds .all the time I keep telling seniors to develop the will to move around forcibly and refuse assistance. any dependance is poison .

2. longevity depend on the will to survive . only the fittest both physically and mentally will play a long innings. other will fall by the wayside and lead a vegetable existence.........
Dear Krish Sir,

1. Giving advice is the easiest task in the world! How do we expect the people with Parkinson's disease or some other nervous

disorder, to move around without assistance? I am strongly believing in karma theory after seeing the ailing near and dear ones!

2. :nono: One of our extended family members donated one of her kidneys to her dear brother to give him an extended life of three

years. He needed it to settle his accounts and share his huge property to his family - wife and three children. He lived to achieve

his ambition. Actually, this lady was advised NOT to donate her kidney because both were only 60% efficient, by one of the leading

doctors in Chennai. She went to another city to get the transplant done and was assured of about ten years of life, in the year 1970.

You will be surprised to know that she had an active life till 1990 and celebrated her 90th birthday recently! But she is unable to

move around for the past six years. Poor dear! So, no one knows about longevity or the tail end sufferings!! :sad:
 
RajiRam ji
!.I suspect I am becoming a bit preachy as you have kindly pointed out .

I believe that Most ailments including serious can be handled and treatment has become easy and common. Not
all suffer from high degree of disability

the most common simple ones are diabetic, BP related, infections of many kinds including urinary ,

hernia or some gynaelogical problem and the more complicated relate to organ donation

,transplant , heart operations and TBs and cancer or parkinson and nerves related.

except one or two which are life threatening with no cure , others can be handled wit a bit of

maturity .
I know many survivors of organ transplants or heart bypasses leading a normal life . also the

success rate of these operations have enormously increased. I have a close relation who has

been successfully treated for breast cancer .she returned to work and retired two years after cure.

2. I have 15 persons in my extended family who are over 75 yrs.I have eight elder siblings with

their spouse making up this number . only one passed away at 83 yrs. .The diseases I have

come across in my family are diabetis , bP ,hernia, walking inability due to vericose , two heart ,


two cancers [one cured and other terminal], knee ,joints related leading to use of aids and wheel

chair. and others more or less normal with minor ailments. I am convinced that with a bit of

family support and financial and physical help most should do well. since we are close knit we

have hardly faced any major issues.These we have handled them pretty well

3.since we spend time with them and organise every family function keeping them only in mind

they feel involved. marriages are in senior citizen friendly places [ ground floor , ramps etc] ,

picnics in parks periodically , remembering birthdays, anniversaries and all calling on each other

atleast once a month . we take them on holidays outside the town to various resorts . all these matter

4.. we also see to it we do not violate their personal space and let them have their views . of

course we listen to them out of respect and mercifully not act on most of them as they are not

fit for acting on for modern living though.lol
 
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