Do we follow some norms and ethics in this forum

[T R RAMAMURTHY]

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Respected Mahanubhavas,
I am a very late entrant to this forum and therefore for all intents and purposes an outsider.
I have followed some discussions and there are very enlightened views but at the same I also find that there are unfortunately crooked opinions which are put just for the sake of argument (Vidhandavadham. To cite an instance are two, I found there was very well discussed opinion on Madisar and Panchakachham in which unfortunately, in my view, sexuality was introduced. I have grown in an agraharam atmosphere and the wearing of madisar/panchakachham drew respect from all as I knew. No doubt a thing that has become uncommon today (Madisar) may be seen by some as unusual and therefore is an object of derisive comment. I think there was a decade back a story in Ananda Vikatan where a respected brahmin lady wore madisar as a high court lawyer. Perhaps this was with some precedence. It might have been in the past that brahmin families had fifteen children. I myself was born in a family of eight. The real reason for not producing more children today is due to availability of contraceptives etc. Further, it is difficult to upbring more children beyond 2/3. Gentlemen, if we ourselves ridicule the customs and traditions, than we do not need any other force like Dravidar Kazhagam. Let us retain the pride in being brahmins firstly for doing so is our duty. We expect this site to help propagate the due respect for Sandhyavandhanam etc. and the protection from Gayathri Japam as said by Paramacharyal.
Next there was another occasion about Upanayanam. I expressed some opinion and there was an interlude from a Mahanubhava linking Upanayanam with reaching puberty.
Thirdly, I happened to see a lady (TB) seeking some view in respect of marriage with a non Brahmin Maharashtrian. This was not unusual but what was unusual was a response expressed by a participant offering help to cook Nonvegetarian dishes. Was it not sarcastic?
I am disappointed that such opinions go in this site without any sort of objection. While expression of frank opinions should be welcome in any such site, there is a bounden duty for all TB's to abide by some code of conduct which basically should respect the common traditions of the Brahmin families. If one does not want to abide, he is free to do so and start another website for non-conformists but he does not have a right to disturb and disappoint the conforming majority. I hold certain values having moved out of TN some forty years back and do not hold brief for the TB community as a whole. There have been some social evils which were the precise reason for the common hatred against TBs in TN. We must not continue to practise them but the point is that we should respect and abide by the traditions and customs which we cherish. My suggestion to the moderators is that genuine criticism to refine the community of old ills should be permitted but respected traditions and conventions should never be ridiculed or not permitted for ridicule in our website. If we had lost respect, it was because we had no sense of self pride. Let us not lose any more self pride. I have no intention to disrespect the seniors in age who also at times make comments in lighter vein, but I would take this site rather seriously and expect the same from others. I may be permitted this liberty.
Respects to the elders and regards and affection to the youngsters.
Thanks
T R Ramamurthy

 

[Dr.T.N.Jambunathan]

Please visit the thread Toxic Humor That was the reason for vanishing of few balanced contributors We really miss them Jambu:sorry:

 

[RVR]

Sri Ramamurthi sir,

I fully agree with your views.

Let us try to do some thing to our community through this forum instead of bringing non-relevant issues.

Definitely it will help poorer sections of our community to a great extent.

All the best

 

[pannvalan]

Dear Ramamurthy,

I understand your concerns and respect your views. At the same time, please consider these points.

1. Comments made from different perspectives give us new inputs and stimulate our
thought process. But, on the other hand, comments/criticism must be decent and
shall never border on vulgarity.

2. Our members are very clever and well informed. Whatever they say here openly
about ourselves will not be shared on an outside platform.

3. Frankly speaking, many of us do not follow the traditions and conventions you refer
to. Some wish to follow, but due to several constraints and compulsions, they are
unable to do so. But, they respect the age old conventions, customs and practices,
because these customs and practices form major part of our cultural identity. They
also feel offended, when someone talks or writes derisively of our common culture.

4. Remember, we have some intruders also amongst us.

5. Without knowing the serious implications of what we post, we sometimes make some
remarks that may cause grievous hurt to majority of the Tamil Brahmin community.
It is out of sheer ego or out of impatience.

6. Unfortunately some elites think questioning all old beliefs is science. No, it is not.

7. Modern education does not teach you to discard all that is old, simply because they
are old. We cannot build 10th floor, after demolishing the 9 floors beneath it.

8. You throw aside all that is muck and pick up only the pearls and diamonds.

9. I have learnt so much from this forum and derived immense benefits from it. You also
practise it.

10. Don't react to malafide comments; just ignore them. That's good for everyone.

 

[kunjuppu]

Greetings TRR.

If I may reply to a couple of your observations.

I think, it was I who introduced sex into the madisar topic. Sir, it was from a viewpoint of appreciation. Sex is there with us everyday, and you and I would not be here had not our parents indulged in sex. I do appreciate some folks would keep shy of discussing it, but that does not reduce the attractiveness of a madisar sari anyday.

Do we need a moral police, to review every post to verify if it stands the test of someone’s sense of morality? By and large, this forum is self policing, and if at all, the threat to it comes from folks who jump in at random, and claim to represent the true religious inheritors of our dharma, and exhort everyone here either to hate our minorities or abuse our current way of Brahmin lifestyle.

To be true, these type of posts, strikes a chord in most folks, who conveniently forget, that for any one viewpoint to dominate others, and scare away diversity of opinion, is the worst thing that can happen to this forum.

Logic, argument, wit and rhetoric, all combined to produce lively postings are the backbones of this forum, I think. In this context, I think, we have on the whole accommodated a wide variety of topics, seen perhaps in no other forum, with a user friendly welcome to folks other than Brahmins, as long as they wish the tamil Brahmin tribe well.

You have quoted kanchi mutt. You will find there are several who have a different opinion of the same.just as your view is respected, so too must the opposite. For it is then we show the tolerance of our faith, and the accommodation of diversity, within ourselves.

To veer away from such tolerance, in the name of conformity, would make us yet another bunch of yes men. Which I hope we do not turn into.

Thank you.

 

[sangom]

Respected Mahanubhavas,
I am a very late entrant to this forum and therefore for all intents and purposes an outsider.
I have followed some discussions and there are very enlightened views but at the same I also find that there are unfortunately crooked opinions which are put just for the sake of argument (Vidhandavadham. To cite an instance are two, I found there was very well discussed opinion on Madisar and Panchakachham in which unfortunately, in my view, sexuality was introduced. I have grown in an agraharam atmosphere and the wearing of madisar/panchakachham drew respect from all as I knew. No doubt a thing that has become uncommon today (Madisar) may be seen by some as unusual and therefore is an object of derisive comment. I think there was a decade back a story in Ananda Vikatan where a respected brahmin lady wore madisar as a high court lawyer. Perhaps this was with some precedence.

Dear Ramamurthy,

Greetings. I agree with you that we should not deprecate ourselves, our customs and beliefs just for the sake of it or in the notion that it imports an element of (out-of-place) humour in the discussions here. But, at the same time I will not be against reasoned criticism of any of the aspects of the TBs, their way of life etc.

Coming to Madisar & Panchakachchham, how many of our women who are now in the age group of 50+ are prepared to wear it on a regular basis at home? According to my knowledge, the anti-madisar mentality started among TB women about 2 or 3 generations ago and it was mainly our ladies who wanted the change. In fact there were daughters-in-law who had to unwillingly conform to this "primitive" (in their view) dress till their in-laws were alive and then changed over to the sari and heaved a sigh of relief. There are perhaps some disadvantages for the 18-muzham pudavai for women who had, over time, to travel more by train, bus etc., from the 1940's and onwards, I don't know.

Of course, I agree with you that this need not have been linked to sexuality.

Gentlemen, if we ourselves ridicule the customs and traditions, than we do not need any other force like Dravidar Kazhagam. Let us retain the pride in being brahmins firstly for doing so is our duty.

As I said, criticism is okay but ridicule is bad.

We expect this site to help propagate the due respect for Sandhyavandhanam etc. and the protection from Gayathri Japam as said by Paramacharyal.

Here, I hold a different view. Most of us, even retired people who don't have to attend office or any such rigid routine, do not perform Sandhya, anyway not all the three times a day, and the parents also do not set an example for their children. If children cannot learn from their father, who usually gives the Gayatri upadesam himself, how can a website or forum like this "propagate" these customs? How many youngsters do browse this site?

Next there was another occasion about Upanayanam. I expressed some opinion and there was an interlude from a Mahanubhava linking Upanayanam with reaching puberty.

I do not know the exact discussions but there seems to be some truth in holding that a boy should be sent to a proper Guru for Vedadhyayanam before he attained puberty, just as brahmin girls were expected to be given in marriage before they attained puberty, lest their father faces punishment worse than even death, according to our Dharmasastras.

Thirdly, I happened to see a lady (TB) seeking some view in respect of marriage with a non Brahmin Maharashtrian. This was not unusual but what was unusual was a response expressed by a participant offering help to cook Nonvegetarian dishes. Was it not sarcastic?

Firstly, I don't understand why a lady should seek the views of this forum in r/o a marriage of a TB girl (I suppose) with a non-brahmin Maharashtrian. To me it appears rather mischievous or out of ignorance. If the original request was seen as not with a genuine motive, someone could have replied in the same vein. Unless I see the relevant discussion, I will not be able to say anything more.

I am disappointed that such opinions go in this site without any sort of objection. While expression of frank opinions should be welcome in any such site, there is a bounden duty for all TB's to abide by some code of conduct which basically should respect the common traditions of the Brahmin families. If one does not want to abide, he is free to do so and start another website for non-conformists but he does not have a right to disturb and disappoint the conforming majority. I hold certain values having moved out of TN some forty years back and do not hold brief for the TB community as a whole. There have been some social evils which were the precise reason for the common hatred against TBs in TN. We must not continue to practise them but the point is that we should respect and abide by the traditions and customs which we cherish. My suggestion to the moderators is that genuine criticism to refine the community of old ills should be permitted but respected traditions and conventions should never be ridiculed or not permitted for ridicule in our website. If we had lost respect, it was because we had no sense of self pride. Let us not lose any more self pride. I have no intention to disrespect the seniors in age who also at times make comments in lighter vein, but I would take this site rather seriously and expect the same from others. I may be permitted this liberty.
Respects to the elders and regards and affection to the youngsters.
Thanks
T R Ramamurthy

I find two separate forums, one for conformists and another for those who would like to question and criticize "our current understanding of scriptures and existing practices". If criticisms are found there we should not object. That is the freedom allowed by the owner of this site.

 

[pannvalan]

I welcome the views of many other members on this topic.

 

[kunjuppu]

sangom,

self effacing humour is among the highest forms of wit. maybe, i think, we take ourselves too seriously?

whether it be panchakachham, kudumi or madisar, i remember jokes about them abounded in ananda vikatan of the 50s.

as we lost more of our political power and standing in tamil nadu, i think maybe we became more conscious of ourselves and our need to be 'respected'.

but this it may be fool in me that continues on live on day dreams of grandeur, while the rest of the tamil brahmin tribe have their nose to the grind and focussing on how to attack the next software challenge?

cheers

 

[T R RAMAMURTHY]

Thanks for the opinions expressed gentlemen

Respected elders and mahanubhavas,
Namaskarams.
Thanks a ton for the opinions and counter opinions expressed. I feel that counter opinions should be respected but do we criticise our elders for what they were or how our traditions and customs were built. I have a firm belief that the edifice which has been built has come out of a long history of practised beliefs. No doubt due to certain puritanical views, unfortunately, the TB society had turned inflexible. It is this inflexibility which required correction but not the foundation itself. Let us remove prejudices. As Mr Pannvalan correctly put it, the 10th floor has to be built on the strength of 9 floors already built but not after destroying the nine floors. We have all lost our homeland where we originally belonged but at least we can try to retain the moorings and protect the culture we cherish. Those who want to change, let them have their view, but let us not disturb the edifice.
Once again many thanks for all the opinions. Let us have an enabling net work of our people where we help each other to their desire, but let us not do ridicule for which there are other sites. I have blown the conch shell. If TB.com is used to help and enable people to come together as a medium and those in the community is helped, it is a big task. I also agree that some things may have been said in lighter vein. No offence.
Namaskarams
T R Ramamurthy

 

[RVR]

Humour and fun is part of life. Definitely we have to bring humour and fun in our writings in this forum off course without affecting the sentiments of others.

However when serious topics are discussed affecting our community, we should not allow the focus to be diverted.

We discuss lot of general topics where we don't have to display same seriousness.

It is a fine line where each one of us should display our maturity.

All the best

 

[sangom]

I feel that counter opinions should be respected but do we criticise our elders for what they were or how our traditions and customs were built.

There was a time two generations ago probably when age by itself commanded abject obedience. No TB dared to disobey his/her elders irrespective of whether their opinions were sensible or not. Many lives were ruined for that reason also. But things changed towards the beginning of the 20th. century (I guess) people started disregarding the opinion of their elders, probably they still did not dare to openly criticize their elders. The removal of "kudumi" can be taken as one of the earliest signs of 'revolt'; next was the habit of going to hotels (of course, "brahmanal coffee clubs" only, still I know elders who strongly disapproved this).

In my generation slowly criticism of elders started because the ways and beliefs of the elders were causing a lot of financial burden on the single earning member of many TB families and the earning members found that things were going in wrong directions. In many TB houses, especially lower middle class, the son used to argue with the father and used to overrule certain expenses which the parents were inclined to do (with the son's money, of course). The adherence to many religious norms earlier followed became practically non-existent as a result; I may cite "mahalayapaksham", "vrathams" of various sorts done by womenfolk, etc., as examples and these diminished. (These have probably been resurrected with the recent financial boom of TBs.)

My sons question many of my ideas and beliefs and even categorically state that these things will not work in the modern world.

All in all, the unquestioning acceptance of religious prescriptions, whether by elders, Rishis, Vedas or Upanishads is a thing of the past. Even in the hoary past Yajnavalkya and later on Ramanuja did not accept the teachings of their gurus. So, our Hindu religion allows questioning and does not require implicit obedience.

I have a firm belief that the edifice which has been built has come out of a long history of practised beliefs. No doubt due to certain puritanical views, unfortunately, the TB society had turned inflexible. It is this inflexibility which required correction but not the foundation itself. Let us remove prejudices. As Mr Pannvalan correctly put it, the 10th floor has to be built on the strength of 9 floors already built but not after destroying the nine floors.

If the 9th., or the 8th. floor is found to be weak no sensible engineer will proceed to construct the 10th. floor unless the 8th. and 9th. floors are demolished and rebuilt strongly. So, let us not go on about the so-called "edifice"; you yourself have said that the puritanical views have to be removed. Please examine and tell me what the TB of today has to flaunt except the puritanical part of brahmanism with which the brahmins were enjoying for nearly a few centuries at least. Do the brahmins have a mastery of even one Veda? Do most of us know even basic Sanskrit so that we can recite the mantras with 'some' critical understanding of their meanings? Do we practice the 'nithyakarmanushtana' rigorously? Then what is the edifice we can boast about? It is at best an archaeological remains.

We have all lost our homeland where we originally belonged but at least we can try to retain the moorings and protect the culture we cherish.

I don't understand what you mean by homeland; if it is India, that is, if you are abroad now, it would have been your conscious choice, not any compulsion. If you see the history of Brahmins, most have moved from one place to another during historical intervals and all of them have continued to live as best as possible.

Those who want to change, let them have their view, but let us not disturb the edifice.

I have already given my views on the "edifice". By criticising our customs, manners, beliefs, scriptures, etc., if the edifice gets damaged, that shows the edifice was inherently a weak one, does it not?

I have blown the conch shell.

"சங்கு ஊதறது" is not what you intended I suppose. It seems to have an entirely different connotation now; perhaps you meant Krishna blowing his conch shell which is supposed to have sent tremors of mortal fear in his enemy's bodies, minds and intellects!!

 

[kunjuppu]

TRR,

loved reading your posts, though i should confess, my reply in details would have mirrored that of sangom's. so i have aborted it.

still, i have only added comment about 'loss'.

at first, my thoughts were alike to sangom's - loss of india? i do not if this is valid. india never belonged to tamil brahmins alone. neither did tamil nadu. neither did chola nadu.

we were one group of tribes, co-living with other tribes, from what i know, in harmony. the disharmony is a current phenomenon.

another sense of loss, is our spiritual heritage. we did not lose it. nobody took it away from us. we willingly gave it up.

for the vast majority of us, poverty is not a willing choice. we will do anything within our means to get out of it. which is what we have done, as a community since early 20th century.

some of us may be selective in our choice towards freedom from poverty, but even in that, the norms change with the times.

so, please explain, where, why, when, what was 'lost'?

 

[T R RAMAMURTHY]

Kunjuppu Sir,
What we have lost as brahmins in TN?
I come from Tiruvidaimarudur and my grandfather used to be a great devotee of Lord Mahalingam and my father presently in Chennai and others in my family continue to be devotees of Lord Mahalingam who has been known across all Southern states. I consider there was or used to be a link with the lord thought it is not lost but we are now remotely linked. We as a family have lost the Kaveri Snana palam though hardly there is any water in Kaveri nowadays. We are uprooted out of our past and ancient links. Somebody wrote here whether we as brahmins know at least one veda. Yeah, had I been in our native place I would have learnt at least one veda in full though I know some small parts of it. What I had learnt as a child, I have not been able to pass on to my next generation and the generations to come. It is not the agricultural lands that we lost, nor the wealth that we still search, but the society that was available to us is lost. Of course, the next generation has gained in terms of educational advantages, we ourselves gained in terms of career advancements etc. The balance sheet that Brahma destined is always tallied. (What they say in Punjabi and Hindi in Sufi music as "Sauda Ik Ho Gaya") Though the gains counterbalanced the losses, the positives of our native place, the bhajans (Govindapuram is next to Tiruvidaimarudur and there is now a Pandurang mandir there) and Baghavathars are missed and their selfless bhakti. I too know of a bagavather in the sixties who I could call the Surdas of my times. These are all lost. Nothing in financial terms. We have gained in terms of devotion as we could see in North, we are comfortable going to a Gurudwara (even to Golden Temple Amritsar) and learning Bharat in ample measure. We have travelled to good parts to Gujarat, Maharashtra etc. and to various Guru Sthans like Shirdi and Tirath places. Despite all these gains, we still do not have the darshan of Mahalinga and Uppiliappan as we would like.
These are the losses. I hope I have made some justification to explain though I am not as adept as some of the writers in the forum.
Thanks Sir. Namaskarams.

 

[kunjuppu]

Thank You TRR.

Your note is one of nostalgia. Nothing wrong in that.

As humans, we tend at several points in life, particularly as we grow older, to look back in life. Some of it is out of a longingness, and others out of relief.

When we were young, we left our native place for many a reason. At that time, there was no doubt in our minds. We just could not wait to get out and seek out our fortunes in this world.

In the process, we gave up certain aspects of our heritage. What you mention as ‘lost’ is not ‘lost’. it was willingly and deliberately shed because these were no longer found relevant for current day living.

Sir TRR, times change and we have to change with them, in order to lead a harmonious life. Just imagine yourself, had you stayed back in tiruvidamarudur, and become a bhagavathar. Had that option ever open to you in your young age?

The only thing constant is that times are changing always. Nowadays they appear to change even faster. there is no purpose in rueing over the past which was not lost, but was cast aside in the hope of something better.

20 20 hindsight is always accurate.

Thank You. again.

 

[sangom]

Thank You TRR.

Your note is one of nostalgia. Nothing wrong in that.

As humans, we tend at several points in life, particularly as we grow older, to look back in life. Some of it is out of a longingness, and others out of relief.

When we were young, we left our native place for many a reason. At that time, there was no doubt in our minds. We just could not wait to get out and seek out our fortunes in this world.

In the process, we gave up certain aspects of our heritage. What you mention as ‘lost’ is not ‘lost’. it was willingly and deliberately shed because these were no longer found relevant for current day living.

Sir TRR, times change and we have to change with them, in order to lead a harmonious life. Just imagine yourself, had you stayed back in tiruvidamarudur, and become a bhagavathar. Had that option ever open to you in your young age?

The only thing constant is that times are changing always. Nowadays they appear to change even faster. there is no purpose in rueing over the past which was not lost, but was cast aside in the hope of something better.

20 20 hindsight is always accurate.

Thank You. again.

Dear Kunjuppu,

You said it. Many people , particularly from among us, found that the old "brahmana" way of life would not give them anything except poverty; why, many poor vaideekans advised their sons to seek their fortunes in Bombay or Madras after they somehow passed matric and type-shorthand.

Having led a hectic life of a family man and discharged the responsiblilities, when people are able to lead a somewhat comfortable retired life (either with their pension/savings or the support of children) they start yearning for the lost "brahmin" life. IMO this is a result of a feeling that they, being brahmins by birth, ought to be credited with all the virtues which would have come had they lived a brahministic life all along. In this effort the mind longs for all that was lost and tries to recapture and relive a life of that type.

But life, and time, are heartless. These do not come back and we have to meekly accept our helplessness before "Time". What has been lost is lost.

This is another view of the topic.

 

[nachi naga]

brahmins by birth,are the only ppl who not only do their karmas be it religious or materialistic.now,a new breed of brahmanas have sprung,who are not by birth,but vehemently follow brahmanic lifestyle.they get fundings from smart marketing of books,visuals,covert/overt funding from goverment agencies,and a mix of international citizens,especially pio's ,nri 's .etc.living a materialistic way of life is good upto a certain age.after 50 better to be spiritual and make amends for he 50 years of life,so that moksham is guranteed.or become living enlightenment aka jeevan muktha.

 

[SuryaKasyapa]

...........another sense of loss, is our spiritual heritage. we did not lose it. nobody took it away from us. we willingly gave it up.

for the vast majority of us, poverty is not a willing choice. we will do anything within our means to get out of it. which is what we have done, as a community since early 20th century......... .

Oh ! Sri Kunjuppu,

The above is a real cream, filtered and concentrated.
It shook me with emotions.

We get such things very rarely. Need to be quoted in golden letters.



Let more such things flow from your pen ( key board?)


Greetings

 

[kunjuppu]

thank you surya...

 

[Raghy]

Sri.Ramamurthy said :-

.....Thirdly, I happened to see a lady (TB) seeking some view in respect of marriage with a non Brahmin Maharashtrian. This was not unusual but what was unusual was a response expressed by a participant offering help to cook Nonvegetarian dishes. Was it not sarcastic?

Sri.Ramamurthy,

Namaskaram. I offered help to learn to cook NV dishes. Was it sarcastic? I assure you, it was not sarcastic at all. It was a practical offer. If a brahmin girl marrying a NB boy is not unusual as mentioned by you, then how can it be unusual for that girl to cook to her husband's liking? By the way, I write from experiences. In my opinion, this forum is a good place to surf due to such various topic discussions and daring messages. Sir, by the way, at one time in the past, brahmins too consumed NV dishes. (This post is not a விதண்டா வாதம்; just plain truth).

Cheers!

 

[KRS]

Folks,

I appreciate the depth of Sri Ramamurthy's anguish. The only message I would like to convey to him is this: While we stand on the broad shoulders of our forefathers, we also see a changed world. A 'Brahmin' is not a Brahmin anymore. For that matter, the other varnas, for whose service a 'Brahmin' was created are either no more or do not anymore want a Brahmin's service.

This is the truth. When the eighth floor of a building is different from the seventh floor structure wise, I need to build my ninth floor to correspond more to the eighth than the seventh.

The message is clear. Times have changed and we need to adapt and change, while still standing on the magnificent broad shoulders of our fore fathers, knowing that certain aspects of our lives will be different from theirs. Hope this makes sense.

Regards,
KRS

 

[T R RAMAMURTHY]

Dear Friends,
My only response to Mr Raghy would be that the original post where he had interceded was about marriage and not about NV dishes. Had the post been for NV dishes, I would have no business to take note of the same. I know that Parihasam is one of our people's forte and we take some pride in that.

 

[Raghy]

Dear Friends,
My only response to Mr Raghy would be that the original post where he had interceded was about marriage and not about NV dishes. Had the post been for NV dishes, I would have no business to take note of the same. I know that Parihasam is one of our people's forte and we take some pride in that.

Greetings. I don't recall interceding in any of the posts in question. For me marriage also extends to living, cooking too. In the old Tamizh movies, where, after marriage, it is 'subham ..Vanakkam...National Anthem..and go home! For me, marriage is a very small initial step. In a Intercaste marriage, there is a possibility for cooking non-vegetarian dishes. I don't see any sarcasm or 'parihasam' in this.

For some wierd reason, Sri.T R Ramamurthy refuses to believe that I was not being sarcastic, inspite of my assurances. Sri.Ramamurthy, I just write plain truth in this forum...I have no reason to deny if I were sarcastic; I said I was not sarcastic, because, I was not; period. I also said I write from my experiences. I know few couples who married inter-caste very well. I know in detail about their life too. I wrote from that experiences. I stand by my message. By the way, you have not addressed my claim that brahmins ate NV in the distant past.

Now I like to comment about you. (You may possibly ignore this little paragraph altogether. Let us see if you dare). You want to talk about ethics and norms about this forum; well, I can repeat all my messages in public, because I follow a strict decorum in my messages. Kindly show the forum in which way my message was sarcastic, please. Show me who was hurt by my message. At least, I am open and straight forward.. when you laid the charge against me, you were not even open about it.

Cheers!

 

[wrongan]

Critics can open a seperate forum for themselves and invite like minded to discuss what all they think is good for todays living of TB. Let them not cross plough.In this forum usefull things are discussed and I am proud that I learned a lot of our traditionnal values.Please don"t put drop of poison in a pot of milk.With deeply wounded soul.Forgive if any one is hurt and is not posted with that sense.

 

[Raghy]

Critics can open a seperate forum for themselves and invite like minded to discuss what all they think is good for todays living of TB. Let them not cross plough.In this forum usefull things are discussed and I am proud that I learned a lot of our traditionnal values.Please don"t put drop of poison in a pot of milk.With deeply wounded soul.Forgive if any one is hurt and is not posted with that sense.

Sri.Wrongan, You are right. I will let this matter go at this. I have no desire to start a fight on this. In fact, in Toronto I did help one Iyengar girl to cook such dishes for her NB husband. She loves him; she wanted to surprise him! Why not? I have very little restrictions.

Cheers!

 

[Dr.T.N.Jambunathan]

Sri.Wrongan, You are right. I will let this matter go at this. I have no desire to start a fight on this. In fact, in Toronto I did help one Iyengar girl to cook such dishes for her NB husband. She loves him; she wanted to surprise him! Why not? I have very little restrictions.

Cheers!

Dear Raghy you have seen my posting Man Manning the house where we were talking about cooking By Birth and By choice we are vegetarian Even Sonu is called Sonu Iyer by our friends since she is a vegetarian! My Wife had given NV cooking demonstrations on several occasions. But we don't do it in home are eat them outside either. cooking and or eating NV is a non issue as far I am concerned This may be of some comfort to you . Bar owner may be a teetotaler! Jambu:crazy: