ravi,
as a preamble to your note may i please state that for folks who have loving parents, deep attachments, happy households and above all a feeling of security and protection at home, the very concept of filial discord is not only an anethma, but something that flays in their face as a violation of all natural laws of nature.
i understand that very well, and it is not my intention to highlight differences here within a family and the ensuing cruelty.
to me, the best medicine is to speak out. keeping things under the carpet or within the closet is of no benefit to anyone. as a community i think, next to the arabs, we are intent on the loss of face.
my mother used to tell me that to her மானம் is worth more than life. on any perceived sense of this concept of maanam, her immediate reaction was extreme நாக்கை பிடுங்கி சாகணம்.
there was no via media compromise to these values, and she lived her entire life like that. hence, i think, many of the discords that people have within the family is never known outside.
on the contrary, to happily householded folks, they can never understand the extent of the discord, and how lucky they themselves are blessed with loving family. such a family is a gift. probably the most precious of any. i think so.
