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We are all Indians...in a hilarious note!!!

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Tamils are always proud to be 'Tamizhs'; Pretty courteous (that is what
they think, at least!). They speak yenglish but sorry, no indi (Hindi).
The more common Madarasi --chennaisi...,now?) is an ardent fan of
kireeket matches.

Their counterparts in Bombay ..(No Mumbai yet) think they live in America
but speak Hinglish like '...are you sure ki Sujata aa rahi hai ya I'll go akela!"
And they take great pride in making stupid mistakes in Hindi Grammar.
The BEST hypocrites in the world.

'Thamizhs', are verrry lecky to have "simble" neighbours in the
keralites who are a komblex race of peoblle (possibly migrated around 2000
B.C. from the middle east and now even the Sheikhs feel wary
of them) but they have excellent GK , eat a lot of chooclyte and own
99.998765% of tyre shops in the world and form 99% of nursing

Not far begind the kerals is the telugu desam, who are totally againesht
flaunting their wealthu to the woruldu, though they occasionally come
out withu brick red shirtsu and parrot green pantsu with pleetsu
('fleet'). Worustu,no?! But they (think) are greatu in CICSu,Microsu and
COBOLu!Generally sane peoplesu (and so you can always findu them
judgingu,probhingu, queschioningu othersu ...)

The Canadians, excuse me, the Kannadigas aor (are) the coolest 'lat'
'dobun' south but if there is political unrest in Hersogovnia oare (or)
an ebola virus outbreak in Zaire, they bash up the Tamils in Karnataka.
'Cauvery' very bad! When it comes to Rajkumar (actor), if a fly sits on
his nose, they'll burn the entire city of Benglore to kill the fly! To
hell with Silicon valley! I-ron, firshtu, girlu, Lasht Bussu, roadu,
crickeatu, filamu are some of their favourites.

Maharashtrians are a conservative, confused,complex lot-kar. -Kar, that
is because gavasakar, tendulkar, bahulkar,.. confused that is because
sitting in southern part of India they would ask the other person "are
you from Maharashtra or from south India..?" and genuinely wonder why
the other person takes some time to answer the question. They like the
principles of 'pheejix' and their favourite character in the alphabet is
'Zay' (god knows where that came from). Although soft, peace loving
people but they elect the shivsena to rule them.

And right there next to the Maharashtrians are the Gujjubhais. They like
to keep 'kes' in the 'benk' and their favourite past time is eating
'snakes' like 'paav bhaji', 'masala papad' and 'pijja' at the local
'snake bar'. They gobble down palak sev like their life depends on it
and believe in the brotherhood and sisterhood of man and woman(everybody
is a 'bhai or a 'ben').

If you go further eesht, you land uf Udissa- the land of irron ('r' is
unsilent) where sombalpuroa and Bhubaneshbara are big towns. The people
are bery cordial and if you are Vikram they bill soorly ask you 'B' or
'Bhe'. They do not sout, sam or soot but occasnally bawsh their phace at
the wasbashin. James Bond Mohanty in our colleze had a roll number jero,
jero, sebhen.

Bengalees are bery bery similor, but or bery proud oph Subas Chondro
Boash and Shoatyojit Roy (I used to know a director by name Satyajit Ray
who was also pretty good) and everybody is 'X'da. I used to have a
friend by name. 'Dada'. Wonder...never mind. Bot I most conphess,
Roshgollas are bery goooood, tho!

Bihari kids are supposed to be the smartest kids in India (if not in the
universe!). How we wish they grow up the same way,...but... And Biharees
are bery phond of Laloo and Put (like' but" )na, ka isse bhadiya tumre pass kooch
hai,kaa?! spit spit...

UP bhaiyas and MPwallas are busy going to ischool and istudying metals to make
lots of ishteel. Bhaiyas are also busy changing often not only govts but CMs too...

Punjabis are very sweet and aggressive and offer'Rotti Shotti Khayega!'
to which I once replied 'No'. He said 'Tage itu,yaar!' By
God'u!'Surjeetu, what happenedu, oi?!'. Then of course,everybody's a
'paappe' or a 'kaakke'. That's P'njab for you.

And Kashmir (called 'Cashmir' by many, may be because of the amount of
cash spent to keep it in India)?!? I know 'Roja (or Rosa?)'was shot (I mean
filmed) somewhere nearby...

But at the end of the day, wherever you are in the world, whether it is
in Sunnyvale, CA; Birmingham, UK; UmmAl Quwain, UAE or Serangoon
Road,Singapore, ask them who they are and you'll get just one answer

Passports may vary but not the spirit !
Tho Sur bane hamaara!

Got this in email today....
Just a joke....Sorry if you are offended

Nice one

Hi Bagya,
That was really nice.
I think I can add some more from what I've observed.
For school, we can see some tamils say 'iskool', the same way Punjabis and UPradeshis say "beti ko iskool chodke aya" whereas Biharis say "sakool".
Biharis add a "wa" as suffix to words. ex., "namakwa".
While we pronounce "H" as "hech", NIs say "eich", similarly for N we say "en", they say "aen" and they comment us on this.
I was wondering what "pan" meant till I found out it is "pen".
Reading the Telugu part , I got reminded of the "Steppulu" term used in Salangai Oli.

By the way , you are Mrs. Bagya or Mr. Bagya. Because the "Nandriyudayan" term confuses as it refers to a male.
naan thirumathi bagya

Dear Kothai ji
It was nice reading about your observation about 'iskool'.

Nandriyudan(with thanks)
Mrs Bagya
Sorry, Bagyaji, it's my mistake. I'd always read it as "Nandriyudaiyan". Sometimes our eyes fool ourselves you see.
'Nadriyuden Bagya's "We are Indians" was a great piece of humour. You observed so keenly the tongues of many an Indians, perhaps, it shows how much we are attached to our own mother tongue; Your other contributions in this forum have also been of much informatory and educative. We do need write-ups like yours very often, in our other threads also. I greatly admire your skills in observing these nuiances in human beings!

with regards,
Pretty harsh on kannadigas,no consideration of their predicament.Karnataka is the only hindutva state in southern india.

But you are not off-mark regarding state of tamil-kannada relations.
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