Purchase second hand dining table from a non-brahmin family

[Divy9]

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Respected all,

We are planning to buy a dining table in second hand condition as my husband has a transferrable job (presently staying in Dehradun). We tried to find as many offers from online or other stores, but didn't get too many options in this small city. As it so happens, we finally come across a suitable dining table at a decent price range and in good condition as well. All factors seem to be favourable for this deal, except that the seller is a muslim family. The family appears to be decent, middle class and literate people and the owner also said that they have hardly used this furniture as they are more ussed to dining on the floor or in front of TV.

Our dilemma is more on the lines of family traditions, since our family members perform parisheshanam before the meals, can we go ahead and buy this dining table from the family. Or would this have an adverse effect for our home and family. Its is a big dilemma now for us and we are really not able to decide what to do in this case.

Please guide us with your spiritual & cultural wisdom.

Many, many thanks!

Divya

 

[sunita]

What!!! If you are so worried, just buy a brand new one.
Even then how are you going to find out if it is made by a brahmin or a non-brahmin???

Assuming you do end up buying this, what is going to happen? is the dining table going to swallow you?

Stop acting silly and buy it if you want to else leave it.
Don't drag caste/community into a stupid dining table purchase.

 

[vgane]

Respected all,

We are planning to buy a dining table in second hand condition as my husband has a transferrable job (presently staying in Dehradun). We tried to find as many offers from online or other stores, but didn't get too many options in this small city. As it so happens, we finally come across a suitable dining table at a decent price range and in good condition as well. All factors seem to be favourable for this deal, except that the seller is a muslim family. The family appears to be decent, middle class and literate people and the owner also said that they have hardly used this furniture as they are more ussed to dining on the floor or in front of TV.

Our dilemma is more on the lines of family traditions, since our family members perform parisheshanam before the meals, can we go ahead and buy this dining table from the family. Or would this have an adverse effect for our home and family. Its is a big dilemma now for us and we are really not able to decide what to do in this case.

Please guide us with your spiritual & cultural wisdom.

Many, many thanks!

Divya

Most of the furniture items are made by Muslim craftsmen in North India! Just go ahead & buy this!! It can be second hand! But no issues! Do not be silly

 

[athimber]

Respected all,

We are planning to buy a dining table in second hand condition as my husband has a transferrable job (presently staying in Dehradun). We tried to find as many offers from online or other stores, but didn't get too many options in this small city. As it so happens, we finally come across a suitable dining table at a decent price range and in good condition as well. All factors seem to be favourable for this deal, except that the seller is a muslim family. The family appears to be decent, middle class and literate people and the owner also said that they have hardly used this furniture as they are more ussed to dining on the floor or in front of TV.

Our dilemma is more on the lines of family traditions, since our family members perform parisheshanam before the meals, can we go ahead and buy this dining table from the family. Or would this have an adverse effect for our home and family. Its is a big dilemma now for us and we are really not able to decide what to do in this case.

Please guide us with your spiritual & cultural wisdom.






Many, many thanks!

Divya

உங்க ஜாதி சிந்தனைகளுக்கு ஒரு அளவே இல்லையா ? மனுஷனே ஜாதி வெறி புடிச்ச்சு என்ன பண்ணனும்னு தெரியாம திண்டாடிண்டிருக்கிற இந்த காலத்தில table chair க்கு எல்லாம் ஜாதி பார்க்காதிங்கம்மா பூமி தாங்காது !!

In case you are so particular about parisheshanam and all, better not use table.

 

[Vaagmi]

Hi Divyaji,

I understand your anxiety.

And I am not here to liberally distribute the revolutionary BS. I believe that what matters is a guiltless session of eating sitting around that table. So do this:

Buy the table and wash it well (as it might have been used to have non-veg food) before starting to use it.

On the first day of using that din ing table, make an offering of Sarkarai pongal to your ishta deivam and eat that prasadam as the first item sitting around that table.

Water purifies all doshams. You might have observed that sages always carried a pot full of water always with them. It is belief of Hindu sastra that water absorbs all doshas. Even today you will observe sanyasis carry the chombu with them when they go to the river or ond for their morning bath. Once they have taken bath there is no need for them to carry any water with them. Yet they carry a pot(chombu) full of water with them back to their ashram. The idea is just this that all doshams that may accrue on the walk back to ashram will be dissolved by the water in the chombu.

So just do not bother about the source of your dining table. Once you have taken the step suggested above it becomes pure.

And forget the harsh words used by the members here.

 

[prasad1]

What!!! If you are so worried, just buy a brand new one.
Even then how are you going to find out if it is made by a brahmin or a non-brahmin???

Assuming you do end up buying this, what is going to happen? is the dining table going to swallow you?

Stop acting silly and buy it if you want to else leave it.
Don't drag caste/community into a stupid dining table purchase.

Good post. If at all you are too polite. LOL

 

[prasad1]

since our family members perform parisheshanam before the meals, can we go ahead and buy this dining table from the family.

It is oxymoron to do parishesanan sitting on a table.
http://www.tamilbrahmins.com/showthread.php?t=7615&p=107555#post107555
Do you know the reason for doing parisheanan, or just do it.

More than water purifying, cow dung definitely does it. (Just an observation, satirical).

Parisheshanam : The concept of parisheshanam is to take a spoon of water pour it around the food plate in a circular motion and end it up pouring the rest of water on the side of the plate. Well the build up to it would be parisheshanam mandiram. Again to understand this we need to put ourselves in time machine and go back to pre-electricity days and no dining table. Our forefathers sat on the floor and had their food, where by the way ants and insects thrived. So before our forefathers had their food, by circling the food with water it creates a circle of fire to fend off the insects from the food. The final drops of water would be used to just wash the hands.

Mr. Kgopalan can explain this much better.

We should follow customs, only if it makes sense. Following customs without understanding is ignorance.

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Divya,

I understand your dilemma. As Vaagmi Sir has pointed out, water purifies everything.

Please follow his advice.

 

[Raji Ram]

It is oxymoron to do parishesanan sitting on a table.
http://www.tamilbrahmins.com/showthread.php?t=7615&p=107555#post107555
Do you know the reason for doing parisheanan, or just do it.

Parisheshanam : The concept of parisheshanam is to take a spoon of water pour it around the food plate in a circular motion and end it up pouring the rest of water on the side of the plate. ........

Here is a thread on ParisEshaNam, posted by P J Sir: பரிஷேசனத்தைப் பற்றி ஒரு வார்த்தை

 

[prasad1]

Dear Divya,

I understand your dilemma. As Vaagmi Sir has pointed out, water purifies everything.

Please follow his advice.

chase (one's) tail

To take action that is ineffectual and does not lead to progress. Refers to how a dog can exhaust itself by chasing its own tail. Come on, Divya, go to sleep. You're just chasing your tail at this point. You may follow others advice, at your own sanity.
[video=youtube_share;kxig2AF1-gw]https://youtu.be/kxig2AF1-gw[/video]


I would not advise you to chase your tail. But I am not a traditionalist.

 

[Raji Ram]

You made me :lol: by viewing that video, Prasad Sir! Thank you .

BTW, seeing the forum name, Divya has come in to find out a solution for her dilemma.

So, the 'modern' brahms can't advise her; only those like Vaagmi Sir can! Got it, Sir?

 

[Vaagmi]

chase (one's) tail

To take action that is ineffectual and does not lead to progress. Refers to how a dog can exhaust itself by chasing its own tail. Come on, Divya, go to sleep. You're just chasing your tail at this point. You may follow others advice, at your own sanity.
[video=youtube_share;kxig2AF1-gw]https://youtu.be/kxig2AF1-gw[/video]


I would not advise you to chase your tail. But I am not a traditionalist.

Divy9,

I did not want to enter into this thread. But looking at the liberal dose of revolutionary rhetoric let loose on you , I want to add just this:

The senile oldies here who have lost the will to stay in control of themselves keep showering advices to just give up and float in the current of time. When changing times want them just to bend these oldies not only bend but prostrate, crawl and lick the dirty boots of time. They will employ all weapons they have. They will arrogantly and rudely call you silly and threaten you with condemnation to a dirty moksha as different from the moksha you have heard of.

Forget what they say and forgive them and move ahead in life holding on to whatever good is there in the dharma.

Ignore their silly advices and preserve your faith.

 

[Raji Ram]

....... In case you are so particular about parisheshanam and all, better not use table.

, Athimber Sir!

My friend asks me why parisEshaNam on a dining table and I replied that it is the modern way to do it! :thumb:

BTW, I am reminded of one of my uncles who did 'neer chutral' before eating and since he was an army

officer, my dad asked him if he still remembered the matrAs to be recited. He coolly replied, 'Athimber!
What is greater than ''Ragupathi Raghava Raja Ram; patheetha paavana Sitaram?'' It ended in :clap2:!!!

 

[prasad1]

You made me :lol: by viewing that video, Prasad Sir! Thank you .

BTW, seeing the forum name, Divya has come in to find out a solution for her dilemma.

So, the 'modern' brahms can't advise her; only those like Vaagmi Sir can! Got it, Sir?

So you are saying NO SENSIBLE answers.
This was in Chit Chat section, and not in Religious section.

The practice of blind rituals, Believing in any other such rituals, superstitions or fads, or other meaningless rituals will not bring one closer to God or make one a better human being.
Superstition is an irrational belief arising from ignorance or doubt. Many people all around the world are gripped by various superstitions and they live their lives in fear and uncertainty. Most of these fears are irrational and superfluous but they still cannot unbind themselves from these evil and false notions.

Unfortunately some so called educated people still practice such superstitions, and advice others to follow such practice. They ask others to follow such hollow practice because they have learned this art, and are scared to loose their importance.

It is like the wooden cart wheel mechanics (blacksmiths), who never learned the maintenance of cars, and find their trade vanishing.

jatilo mundee lunchhitakesahkaashaayaambara bahukritaveshahpasyannapi cha na pasyati moodhohyudaranimittam bahukritaveshah... bhaja govindam, bhaja govindan

These different disguises or apparels.substance:an ascetic with matted locks, a person with shaven head, one more with hair pulled or plucked out and another parading with ochre or any other colour robes, allthese are for a livelihood. they all have eyes but yet do not see. all these are indeed disguises and deceptions for the sake of filling one's stomach (Or EGO).
"parisheshanam" must be done sitting cross legged on the floor, eating food served on a leaf. Ask any learned vidhikar (not some one masquerading as one), doing it on a table is not recommended.

 

[Raji Ram]

Two of my uncles addressed my dad as 'Sir' whereas the other two addresses as 'Athimber'!

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Prasad Sir,

Many of tambrahms has drifted far away from orthodox ideas and they don't follow what 'vaidheekAs' do!

So, we are happy if at least one name of God is remembered while eating, by way of 'neer chutral'.

Hence our claps to our uncle!
BTW, each one is entitled to have one's own superstitions because they help the mind to be relaxed! eace:

That is why, many of us keep a coin tied in a new cloth dipped in turmeric water and dried, before an

important celebration / pilgrimage in the family. Can we ask whether the coin will save us from all troubles?

It is just a belief to relax the mind.

 

[athimber]

, Athimber Sir!

My friend asks me why parisEshaNam on a dining table and I replied that it is the modern way to do it! :thumb:

BTW, I am reminded of one of my uncles who did 'neer chutral' before eating and since he was an army

officer, my dad asked him if he still remembered the matrAs to be recited. He coolly replied, 'Athimber!
What is greater than ''Ragupathi Raghava Raja Ram; patheetha paavana Sitaram?'' It ended in :clap2:!!!

Dear RR,

let me make it very clear that I am never meant to say anything against to Parisheshanam. My only view was if one has to practice all these now a days, let him do it with complete devotion. I still don't think a table is the right place for a proper brahmin way of consuming food. First and foremost reason is no one ever cleans it with cow dung which we usually do when clean our eating place on floors, which allows us to maintain the traditional purity. Secondly the sitting posture is different in a chair and on floor. That also is important if we look at the traditional way. Hope I made my point more clearer now.

NB I must say a word or two about your uncle's 'neer chuttal' More than his mantra, his frankness to accept it, is what attracts me more...

 

[prasad1]

Dear Prasad Sir,

Many of tambrahms has drifted far away from orthodox ideas and they don't follow what 'vaidheekAs' do!

So, we are happy if at least one name of God is remembered while eating, by way of 'neer chutral'.

Hence our claps to our uncle!
BTW, each one is entitled to have one's own superstitions because they help the mind to be relaxed! eace:

That is why, many of us keep a coin tied in a new cloth dipped in turmeric water and dried, before an

important celebration / pilgrimage in the family. Can we ask whether the coin will save us from all troubles?

It is just a belief to relax the mind.

One understands the superstition and still follows it, is merely buying an insurance, or carry an umbrella even on a sunny day. That is harmless.
But if you ask, a meteorologist he can give you the correct perspective on when and where it will rain and then you can make an educated guess.
It is like your favorite sari. It does no harm and does not cost extra either.

In this case she is buying a Dining table, probably a major purchase.
Then again what do you do when eating in a restaurant? How do you do parisheshanam? So on certain days you have ritual holidays.
If you compromise on certain days, why pretend to care about them on some other days.
The lifestyle has changed. We have left our ancestral homes, we have to compromise on our ritualistic practices, then why pretend or be ignorant about rituals.
How many of us really do Sandhyanavandanam as prescribed.

The Vedas prescribe prayers at sunrise and sunset. Sunrise constitues a change from darkness tolight and hence a sandhya time (that is a time of junction). This is referred to as Pratha Sandhya. TheSun set constitutes a change from light to darkness and hence a sandhya time, this is referred to asSayam Sandhya. To these two our sages have added a third known as Madhyanika or midday,constituting a change from an ascending sun to a descending sun in the sky. The addition of Madyanika has another significance, during this time we can offer our prayers seeing the sun.

Just pretending to do it when your mother visits is plain lying, or worse cheating.

 

[prasad1]

Why is it that we do parishEshanam only when we are eating rice and not when we are eating other kinds of food like chappatis and dosas.

In the olden days, When there was no tiled or cemented floors were in olden days, the
parisheshanam prevented ants and other insects to come on to your leaf on which food was served.

Secondly this practice is only in south India, I have not seen this practice even among Brahmins in North India.

 

[prasad1]

Dear RR,

let me make it very clear that I am never meant to say anything against to Parisheshanam. My only view was if one has to practice all these now a days, let him do it with complete devotion. I still don't think a table is the right place for a proper brahmin way of consuming food. First and foremost reason is no one ever cleans it with cow dung which we usually do when clean our eating place on floors, which allows us to maintain the traditional purity. Secondly the sitting posture is different in a chair and on floor. That also is important if we look at the traditional way. Hope I made my point more clearer now.

NB I must say a word or two about your uncle's 'neer chuttal' More than his mantra, his frankness to accept it, is what attracts me more...

Good explanation. Non threatening. LOL

 

[prasad1]

If you are making rational worldly decision, then it should be based on rational parameters.
If you are gambling blind (sure way to lose) then it may be based on superstitions.
When playing stock market, and you pick your stock on the basis of charts, and doing due diligence, there is no superstition needed. But if you pick your stock by throwing darts, then a lucky charm may be needed.

 

[Raji Ram]

Dear Prasad Sir,

The question is about buying a used table and not stocks.

Some of us still have inhibitions to use the ones on which non-veg stuff were eaten.

Please try to understand.

BTW, there existed one mAmA, who used to perform Ganapathi Homam, after eating omelette.

His thinking might have been, 'konnAp pAvam; thinnAp pOchchu'! :hungry:

 

[prasad1]

Dear Prasad Sir,

The question is about buying a used table and not stocks.

Some of us still have inhibitions to use the ones on which non-veg stuff were eaten.

Please try to understand.

BTW, there existed one mAmA, who used to perform Ganapathi Homam, after eating omelette.

His thinking might have been, 'konnAp pAvam; thinnAp pOchchu'! :hungry:

I am not going to argue with you Rajiji. But we eat in restaurants that serve NV in the same table, plates, and utensils. What do we do? Compromise, compromise, and compromise.

BTW, there existed one mAmA, who used to perform Ganapathi Homam, after eating omelette.

Is that not a waste of time, who was he trying to fool?
I am not fooled, i know a fraud when I see one. I might ignore it, but if he brags about it, i will point it out. Ignorance is bliss as long as you do not open your mouth or post it in an open public forum.

 

[prasad1]

There’s a secret to newly appointed campaign manager Kellyanne Conway’s success with Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump: she knows how to play to his ego. “Kelly’s telling Trump what he wants to hear,” the source said.

“She has a whole vocabulary of diplomatic words. That’s the kind of woman he likes around, who can tell him the soft way ― encourage him, guide him but not criticize him,” said a second source close to Trump.

“She’s a genius,” the second source close to Trump told HuffPost. “I get much further telling people what they want to hear. That’s a good way to handle Donald, you reinforce what he wants to do. She is so diplomatic it’s unbelievable.”

“She’s used to dealing with certifiable people ... as long as you follow the crazy rules you can get along perfectly,” the second source said.

She gets paid to that. May be I too can be persuaded!!!!!!!!!! NAH.

 

[Raji Ram]

:lol: