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Palakkad Iyer Airlines

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While the Jet Airlines is much in the news, here is a piece all of us can enjoy. (While it is fun, one can learn some traditions also).

Headquarters: Palakkad, of course!

Insignia: The logo of the airline will be panchapatram & Uddharini! The tails of all the aircrafts will carry this sign.

Inaugural flight: PI 108 from Palakkad to Chennai! (108 is a significant no. for us)

Crew: The entire aircraft crew will be PIs. The stewards and stewardesses will be clad in soman/angavasthram and 9 yards podavai respectively.

Menu: The snacks menu will have idli, vadai, adai, bajji, bonda, dosa etc, served on different days. On festival days, the relevant food will be served. Kali/puzhukku on Tiruvadirai, appam/pori on Karthigai and so on. The beverages will include panakam on Sree Rama Navami day.

Announcement: The cabin announcement will be in PI Tamil followed by English as is the standard practice. The announcement in PI Tamil will run like this: Ellarum vango. Naanakkum Bhagyalakshmi, intha flight la cabin crew chief. Intha plane no. PI 108 Palakkad lenthu Chennaikku porathu. Porathukku ekadesam oru manikoor aakum. Intha flight la ongalukku pidicha palaharam ellam vilambuva.

Intha plane parappikkarathu Capt. Ananthanarayanan aakkum. Avar kooda Capt. Gopalakrishnanum irukkaan.

Cabin crew ellarum nanna namma bashai pesuva. Ongalukku ethavathu venamana engale kooppudungo. Udane varuvom. Ellarum nanna sukhichundu pongo!

International Flights: The first international service will be from Palakkad to New York. Flight No. PI 1008. (another no. of significance to us)

The announcement will be on the same lines as domestic flight. But being a long haul flight of about 18 hrs, will additionally have the following too: Intha flight 18 manikoor edukkum. Athinale aarukkavathu paduthukkanamana jamakkalam/thalagan i kidakkum. Sandhyavandhanam pannandavalukku panchapathram/ uddharini kidakkum.

On Amavasai days, for those who need, Vadhyar service will be available for performing tharpanam!

Business and first class passengers will receive compliments: velli panchapatram/ uddharini.

But also to maintain tradition, the miniskirt wil have jarigai and hostess willl have mali poo on head wid kungumam and metti and stuff.
and the seats will b alotted according to the gothram...so that the passengers can find their long lost relatives... .
the seats won hav numbers...as in 3 A,B ,C...it'll hav da names of places....lik 3 kodavayoor, 5 perembavoor etc
The entertainment system will have live proceedings of the poojais of kula deivams .. and seats can be allotted according to that also

Another part of the initial announcement should be:

"kulimuri yum kakkoosum pinnaltha side la mathram thaan irrikku, kettela? athu ennathinaala- na... minbhagathila antha edam naangal kovil kettiyurukkom - left la pillayar kovil, right la bhagavathy kaavu. chapadarathika minnala kovil-kku poyittu vaango"

At the end before landing
"ippo palakkad la eranga porom, ayyo bhayangara choodu appa velila. flight-lendu erangaratta complimentary visheri eduthukango. rombha santhosham neengal flightla vandel. oru last vishayam - vera flight-leyum kovil kettara kaaryam baaki irukku, therinchida? enna.. kaiya toranthu subhikshama donate pannungo ennu request. sheri."
Sambharam will be served throughout in long haul flights!

In international flights, the duty free carts will sell pattu podavai and jewellery items!
n flight la tapes will play rudra japam...those who want can put the earfones on n njoy
Would the food be served on a banana leaf? Also duty free goods much include Maghzni, Chaka varati, etc...snack items
there will be a big maa-kolam at the door of the flight.... tradition... pookolam during onam...
In long haul flights, to prevent deep vein thrombosis, dhanvantharam kuzhambu will be provided to each passenger in a small bottle!

The stewards will teach some of the guys who're interested how to do sandhyavandanam, before the flight takes off.

No flights will leave during rahu kalam.

The following will be provided in the toilets:

umikkari - pallu thekka
irkkili - nakku vadikka

nice idea, im in for the cabin crew.. and my dad suggsted that along wid the intro of captain , u can mention his gothram.. like capt ramasubramoniam , haritha gothram!..
the captain would recite the entire "abhivade" so his name gothram etc.... everything will be mentioned.
Just imagine fro shahstha preethi v say d pilot has to yelagafy and then the ellai (banana leaf) kattu wil be given to him n only then will passengers get food... bhajanai by aour Air Hostess & Party...
Oh and men who r in their vrathams for Shabarimalai will have a separate class by itself called Sanidhanam Class...

No Air Hostess to letch at ..probably men will serve them.. Only black mundu allowed...They will be seated separately from women... again no bird watchin...

Complimentary Items in Food : Nayee Payasam directly from shabari malai...
Free Shabarimalai Instruction guide for Kannis.....

Palakkad Iyer Airlines (PIA) has taken delivery of its first Airbus 380 aircraft. The aircraft was flown in from Toulouse, France by Capt. Gopalakrishnan and his team. The aircraft was accorded a rousing reception at Palakkad International Airport on arrival. The welcome included poorna kumbham by Doraiswamy Vadhyar and party, to the accompaniment of nadaswaram.

The wide bodied aircraft can carry 520 passengers and a crew of 24. This aircraft will be used on PIAs prime route, Palakkad to New York. The aircraft sports the traditional panchapatram- udharini insignia on its tail.

The aircraft will have three class configuration First, Business and Economy. The First and Business classes will be housed in the upper deck of the aircraft.

The First Class will provide state-of-the- art conveniences and a totally Palakkadan ambience. The First Class, aptly named 'Agraharam, will have 6 cabins in a row, much like the typical Agraharams of Palakkad. There will be maakolam outside each cabin door and a pot bearing thulasi plant will be kept near each door.

The cabin will provide an exclusive, private atmosphere for the aspiring Palakkad Iyer. The facilities will include a fully reclining bed, covered with jamakkalam specially ordered from Erode, a complete set of silverware including panchapatram and udharini for performing sandhyavandanam. The cabin floor will be covered by specially made mats from Pathamadai (pullu payi) and will have wooden plank (palagai) for sitting down and having food. The cabin will have a pooja room and will provide facilities for performing nithya pooja for those who need it. Fresh flowers will be provided and also a naivedyam of prior choice
KALKERAL mama. Please introduce cheap /Garib class also. We do not need full seat.
Put instead a pattu pai and six can sit in row and we will bring our food. If you introduce Mumbai- Palakkad non stop at Rs 500 , We will organize a special week like this
1) Monday Matunga
2) Tuesday Chembur
3) Wednesday Mulund
4) Thursday Dombivili
5) Friday Bandra
6) Saturday Andheri
7) Sunday Borivili
Assembly at Ayyappa temple at each centre complete with breakfast and food packet to supplied by Sivam mama's son of Asthika samaj and a special bus to the airport.
Nice commentary. I enjoyed it. Hope our Palghat brethern are not offended. Let us treat it as just a joke
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Actually this was sent to me by a Palakkad Iyer, Hariharan. It is a hilarious description and nothing else. This reminds me Chavi's "Washinton-il Thirumanam" originally published in Ananda Vikatan during 1960s.
If you fly on an 'Islamic airline' you will notice that the television screen constantly displays direction of Mecca. this for the reason that passengers then can face the displayed direction and do namaaz.
Similarly, PIA will display thekku, vadakku, merukku.... so that sandyavandanam, madyanikam, etc can be done in the right manner.
Somebody please suggest security announcement for breathing masks, seat belts, life jacket, evacuation, location of doors, selection/volunteering of passengers for seating near emergency exit doors.
Strictly no shoes and socks. Only cherruppu or sandals. Barefoot is tolerable.
1st decoction coffee in dowra/tumbler. No spoons for stirring as coffees need to be hurled into dowra from tumbler from a height of 2+ feet.
For mouth freshners... vettalai, paku, chenambu and pokhelai. No spitting after chewing. Please swallow the residue. Vettalai should be Kumbakonam vettalai
All aratis, homams inside the aircraft will be done in electric ummis and electric villakus. No camphor burning, instead camphor fumes will be blown during pooja/homams
Announcements(in tamglish/talayalam) would be made as soon as the aircraft flies over a famous temple or triveni or pilgrimage spot.
There would be no serving of mineral water bottles or water in sealed cups. Bottles and sealed cups would contain sambharam at all times
sambharam and chukku vellam will be served....kalan.,olan avial
very important menu....tamilayalam must...kondai enge irukkal...
palakkad bhashai mattum thaan pesalam...other languages
are prohibited....all air hostess uniform must be in Madisaar....

safety announcement

Intha plainile naalu kadhavugal undu. Rendu minnale rendu pinnale. Plain engen kadalileyo matto vizhuntha kadhavai thorandhundu velile polam. Kaatru koranju shwaasam muttara mathiri irukkarathe melerinthu oxygen mask vizhum. Aadhyam avava mookile adanchinduttu pinne aduthava mookai adayungo. kadalle vizhuntha kaserakki keezhe irukkara cushionai eduthu kettikkungo. kettinda vellathile mungadhakki modhakkalam. chagara sthithi vandha naalu gayatri japichoottu vellathukkadile polam. Plain parakkarathukku minnale ellarum orakke orukka "ishwaro rakshathu" nnu kathungo.
Inthe plainu evadarundu evadavarai chellum; Kaasarkodilurundu thodangi avasanam Thiruvananthapuram ethikkan sadikkum. pinne thanne kadalle vizhum. Return ticket edukkan aavasyamilla. Ende guruvayurappa ratchikkanum. Saami saranam
hi hi
at least let us laugh at ourselves,lest we forget humour.
only other community which laughs at itself -great sardars
others would have lynched the author
yeah yi, naan koracchu korachu purichindane aakkum..ippo en thoppai velikirudu aakum:high5:
pilots wearing turban,poonal,barechested with vibhuhti chandanam kumkumam on forehead with kadila pooh,preferably a kudumi sticking out from turban like a tail ,slightly modern palakads have special agni-hothri seats ,usually suruttu or beedi is provided
ya with airhostress serving thayir sadam with tamarakkizhangu and morumolagai........and in the PA putting rudram & chamakam.less cabin baggage and more hand baggage( manchai (yellow) sanchi)...lols
ya with airhostress serving thayir sadam with tamarakkizhangu and morumolagai........and in the PA putting rudram & chamakam.less cabin baggage and more hand baggage( manchai (yellow) sanchi)...lols
:faint: yellow bags 2 much boss:high5:
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