Rangam.. I heard the voice behind me say. The desi lady stared straight back at me and continued to say "rangam.. rangam.. srirangam" it was in a walmart store somewhere in the bay area when I was already breaking apart..
Rangam was sudha's sisters name. When I had called her for the first time when I was in India, her sister had picked up the phone and I had said "Rangam.. give the phone to sudha".. the word rangam is pronounced with a slur which is usually found in the brahmin accent. The next instant, I heard her squeal at the other end.. "Ma.. he just called me just like appa.." and then sudha came on the line..
Now, rangam is not even a word by itself.. so imagine the shock when I heard it coming from a indian lady in walmart..
It was also an indian guy who told me his name was sneha on the phone..
These were desi people..
The old people called it "Soozhnilai" or surrounding circumstances. It is believed that no one is bad by themselves but the circumstances forces the person to act in a particular way be it right or wrong. I wonder what the soozhnilai was that made these people threaten their own brethren namely me.
My experience or remembrance does not stop there..
It was a '96 world cup.. India - Pakistan match.. aamir sohail was in good touch and creaming everything.. He had just smacked one through the off side and waved his bat menacingly at venkatesh prasad the bowler.. the crowd was going wild and every one was screaming and on edge. The next ball venkatesh prasad came and bowled one that went into the gap and sent sohails off stump for a walk.. everyone in the room jumped.. I still remember hearing the screams and shouting from the neighbouring houses as well..
And last week.. it was a pakistani who stopped me from going back to the aged care centre..
My own people sent me screaming into madness and a pakistani helped me remain calm.. and yet I had screamed with everyone else on that day during the india pakistan match.
Do you see.. why we call it maya.. nothing is real and nothing is permanent.
In the midst of all this is the fact that only an uneducated hooligan will say something like "I will crush your skull".. An astute observer will notice that there is absolutely no control over whether you will actually be able to crush a skull or not.. you see.. I am pretty sure neither sohail or venkatesh prasad could have guessed that the particular ball was going to crash into the off stump. I now realize this.
I now have to see what more I will end up experiencing.
Its like my mother told me when I was in 9th standard.. everything is taken care of... close your eyes and walk forward with confidence.
And thats what I intend to do...
Rangam was sudha's sisters name. When I had called her for the first time when I was in India, her sister had picked up the phone and I had said "Rangam.. give the phone to sudha".. the word rangam is pronounced with a slur which is usually found in the brahmin accent. The next instant, I heard her squeal at the other end.. "Ma.. he just called me just like appa.." and then sudha came on the line..
Now, rangam is not even a word by itself.. so imagine the shock when I heard it coming from a indian lady in walmart..
It was also an indian guy who told me his name was sneha on the phone..
These were desi people..
The old people called it "Soozhnilai" or surrounding circumstances. It is believed that no one is bad by themselves but the circumstances forces the person to act in a particular way be it right or wrong. I wonder what the soozhnilai was that made these people threaten their own brethren namely me.
My experience or remembrance does not stop there..
It was a '96 world cup.. India - Pakistan match.. aamir sohail was in good touch and creaming everything.. He had just smacked one through the off side and waved his bat menacingly at venkatesh prasad the bowler.. the crowd was going wild and every one was screaming and on edge. The next ball venkatesh prasad came and bowled one that went into the gap and sent sohails off stump for a walk.. everyone in the room jumped.. I still remember hearing the screams and shouting from the neighbouring houses as well..
And last week.. it was a pakistani who stopped me from going back to the aged care centre..
My own people sent me screaming into madness and a pakistani helped me remain calm.. and yet I had screamed with everyone else on that day during the india pakistan match.
Do you see.. why we call it maya.. nothing is real and nothing is permanent.
In the midst of all this is the fact that only an uneducated hooligan will say something like "I will crush your skull".. An astute observer will notice that there is absolutely no control over whether you will actually be able to crush a skull or not.. you see.. I am pretty sure neither sohail or venkatesh prasad could have guessed that the particular ball was going to crash into the off stump. I now realize this.
I now have to see what more I will end up experiencing.
Its like my mother told me when I was in 9th standard.. everything is taken care of... close your eyes and walk forward with confidence.
And thats what I intend to do...
