Raji Ram
Active member
Dear Vaithehi,
What you say is true about uneducated and poor old widows.
It brings tears in our eyes when we see the old age homes for the destitute!
See this video: Savithri Vaithi- CNN-IBN Real Heroes Awards
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ஆண் முதுமையில் இழக்க கூடாத சொத்து மனைவி ம
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What you say is true about uneducated and poor old widows.
It brings tears in our eyes when we see the old age homes for the destitute!
See this video: Savithri Vaithi- CNN-IBN Real Heroes Awards
:yo: YES Sir!
Still the example you have given might happen even now, because men folk think that they are young till they hit 70!!
BTW, last year one guy from our village celebrated his 'maNi vizhA' within three years of his marriage with a lady about
10 years younger to him. No kids possible hence. :sad: [/QUOTE
what is the age for mani vizha 75 yrs. ?
do men admit they are old when they reach 70 yrs . others may consider them old.
it is easy to talk boldly .sometimes one gets carried away and start becoming a bit theoretical about possibilities and not see reason . we are in our own complex web of relationships involving children ,siblings and inlaws . what we do affects so many around us that options many times are very limited. we have succumbed in life because of bonds and cannot break free to do what we like .we are prisoners of our family circles.some may call it cowardice . but others would call it maturity . we have conformed but we are not going to win national awards for being this way . lol
oh you are a tamil language fan . i I thought it was called sashti abda poorthi by our TB brethren'MaNi vizha' is at the age of 60!
V
V.Balasubramani
Guest
Mam,
First of all why should one either think about the past or about the future, especially when one believes in the present alone? What way it is going help in asking who was my wife in previous life and who will be my spouse in my future life….??
Is there, life after death…..????
Having married and accepted one as a partner all that one can do is 'to be good and do good, be faithful, sincere and affectionate to one another'.
Digging the past and exploring the future…….?????
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Dear Sir,
Its not that I want to know who was my previous birth husband or future life husband etc..its just that when we think on this mode that nothing is ever the same we do not really want to get attached to anyone too much...just do our duty right that should suffice.
Only those who hold on too tight to the present and think this is permanent and real they become too depressed when faced with the slightest adversity.
That is why most Indians commit suicide so easily when faced with any failure.
how can anyone do duty right if future husband is better than the present one. you might go crazy thinking of the pleasant future that awaits you . you might get rid of the present one early and try to reduce the waiting time for future husband thru a meaningful way such as suicide etc to be reborn early. thats why many indian women commit suicide .
vaithehi ji
it is not like that .
men think of women all thru their life . it is not related to age at all.only men do not think that ladies are suffering . in fact men believe that most of the ladies are having a grand time and many ladies give men a run for their money.ladies feel bad when they see what other ladies are getting in life and what is denied to them . then they feel they are suffering and start feeling miserable about wrong choice of spouse and such things.
Krish ji,
Dont you get it?? I am not sitting and thinking of future or past life husband..all I am saying that a spouse is only for one life..the past ife and future life spouses were not and might not be the same...so when this is the scenario why get so attached to anyone?
You see let me tell you how my mind works in any relationship of any kind be it siblings,parents,spouse,mama or machan!
Its like this..I always ask my self :
1)Do you like this person?
Answer :Yes
2)Was he/she with you in a previous life?
Answer: Dont know..may be yes or may be not.
3)Will he/she be with you in a next life?
Answer:No idea
4)Then what do you know?
Answer :Nothing!
5)When you know nothing yet you feel you like someone?
Answer: Yes..thats attachment I guess.
6)Will this attachment end?
Answer: Yup ..when either one drops dead.
7)So what next?
Answer: Just do duty right..show love to everyone without holding on too tight to anything.
Ok Krish ji..this how my mind thinks and I cant help it... been like this since young even before I got married!LOL
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R ji,I fully understand you young lady. only pulling your leg.It is a bizarre way of getting detachment from those you desire
.driving yourself with thoughts of duty alone may not be a good way to live. fulfilling all your desires and being a little dependent will make men also feel that they are wanted. Even if you are independant , good to depend also on others even if they are not as good as you to perform the same task.
many ladies do the mistake of taking everything on their capable shoulders and not delegate anything to spouse or servants. this way they get only overworked . the guide to happy living is delegate all work if your skills are far above the requirements of the tasks .As a doctor your speciality is to cure patients of their ills . other jobs such as cooking ,washing and driving cars etc can be left to others . you probably can contribute more to society as a doctor than doing domestic work or driving a car. well , this has been my philosophy.
I have created a structure in life based on this philosophy and implemented it in my house and my sons house . I have seen to it hard core professionals career women do not enter the kitchen or drive cars.specially in india where domestic labour is cheap , it is foolish for career women to engage in these tasks .
ladies in my home are scaling great heights as career women.it is a good feeling.
.driving yourself with thoughts of duty alone may not be a good way to live. fulfilling all your desires and being a little dependent will make men also feel that they are wanted. Even if you are independant , good to depend also on others even if they are not as good as you to perform the same task.
many ladies do the mistake of taking everything on their capable shoulders and not delegate anything to spouse or servants. this way they get only overworked . the guide to happy living is delegate all work if your skills are far above the requirements of the tasks .As a doctor your speciality is to cure patients of their ills . other jobs such as cooking ,washing and driving cars etc can be left to others . you probably can contribute more to society as a doctor than doing domestic work or driving a car. well , this has been my philosophy.
I have created a structure in life based on this philosophy and implemented it in my house and my sons house . I have seen to it hard core professionals career women do not enter the kitchen or drive cars.specially in india where domestic labour is cheap , it is foolish for career women to engage in these tasks .
ladies in my home are scaling great heights as career women.it is a good feeling.
Dear Krish ji,
Being a doctor is just my profession..that is only part of my life and does not define the true me.
I like doing work at home too like cooking,washing,cleaning too..what is wrong in that?
Many working women make the mistake of being carried away by career...but career also is just for this life isnt it? So why hold on too tight to that too?
I love to cook my own food cos I am concerned about the quality of food and I dont find cooking as foolish for a career woman. I would not like to eat other peoples cooking all the time.
Today I made my own Mooru(butter milk) to bring to work..the shop nearby also sells Mooru but I prefer making my own.
I always motivate myself to handle my life both home and work..if at home I am feeling tired becos of housework I just tell myself "just imagine God if coming to you house now and surely you would get up and clean it isnt it?..the very next second I would be on my feet cleaning the house.
I also find housework as a good workout in the morning..it keeps you trim and fit.
BTW I love driving its fun especially on an empty highway with less cars its just smooth sailing Formula One cruise!LOL
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D
dhikshita
Guest
Mr.Krish,
Well said. I agree with you and it is impracticable in a bonded life of good human being with moral character to lead an aberrated life against one's desire by forcefully to entering into a jungle where the jungle law prevails. (in civilized life also the so called jungle law prevails). What can those personalities would achieve if does against the will and desire. What would be the fate of that particular atma which practice penance. Who knows. The God alone define everyone's destination.
D
dhikshita
Guest
VB
Well said. A good logistic approach in order to survive in this competitive world which lack love and affection.
well said sir . God and only God can define ones destination. Only He can deposit our atma in the right body in our next janma. The kids in this forum can listen to your wise counsel and avoid speculating about the future and surrender to the will of God.we can hardly escape the karmas destined for us in this life and beyond
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