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Upakarma kandarishi tharpanam

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Dasan ksvasan pranams
though belated this doubt came to my mind during performing kandarushi tharpanam. i am raising this doubt for future reference.
we are required to use atshathai and thilam during the above tharpanam. Is it required that thilam should be used by persons with parents alive. I was under the impression that thilam is used only for pithru tharpanam. Request clarification.

Dasan Sinivasan (ksvasan)


Well-known member
"tarpaNam", the word means to "satisfy, make happy", etc. Usually, it is believed that tilam or sesame seeds (black - and not the skinned, white variety) offered with water satisfies the pitrus or manes. But lately, many vAdhyAra and the so-called orthodoxy among tabras have invented a new sub-clause viz., the black sesame seeds are to be used only for the "prEtas" or lingering entities during the 11 days immediately after death of a person, and that for pitrus proper rice akshatam (or unbroken rice grains) have to be added in order to perform tarpaNam. Going by this new rule, the kANDa rishis (word meaning is rishis who taught certain special or peculiar kANDa of the veda) should also be offered both rice and sesame seeds, since these are directed towards rishis and not pretas. Some vAdhyArs do however say that only rice has to be used for the rishi tarpaNam.

As it is all a matter of 'blind belief' any one thing is as good as the other and so my view is do as the vAdhyAr says. That will solve all the problems.

Have you tried offering "filter coffee" as tarpaNam to your parents residing in the next town and have they ever got the satisfaction (திருப்தி) thereof, as result of the tarpaNam?
[FONT=&quot]Tharpanam[/FONT][FONT=&quot][/FONT][FONT=&quot]Tharpanammeans “That offering which satisfies”. But what we mean by the word Tharpanamis the offering of water mixed with gingelly (Thilam) to the pithru manes (deadancestors). Though we have several ancestors, this offering is addressed tothree generations of father, grandfather and great grandfather along with theirwives in our family and maternal grandfather, his father and grandfather alongwith their wives in our mothers’ birth family. Only those whose father is deadare eligible to do Tharpanam. If maternal grandfather is alive Tharpanam shouldnot be done for his family but restricted to our family.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]All themanes are supposed by our religion to live in the Pithru Loka for some time andeither be reborn as any being or go to Lokas like Devaloka, Vaikuntaloka etc oreven attain salvation by getting mixed with god. The Pithru Loka is populatedby three group of Pithru devas viz, Vasu, Rudra and Adhithya. These devasreceive our oblations and make it reach to our manes wherever they are and inwhichever form they are. The Pithru Loka is supposed to be on the unseen sideof the moon. This portion gets exposed to sun on the new moon days. It isaccording to our concept lunch time for the people populating the Pithru Loka.These Pithrus, since they have left the world are solely dependent on onlytheir progeny to feed them. This feeding is done through Tharpanam. It isbelieved that if Tharpanam is not done out Pithru devas will curse us so thatwe may not have male descendents to offer tharpanam to us.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Thereare several type of tharpanams: -[/FONT][FONT=&quot]1. Gundatharpanam- the tharpanam which is done in the first ten days of death.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]2. Brahma Yagnatharpanam-This is the oblation supposed to be done daily to the Devas, Rishis and Pithrus.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]3. Parhenitharpanam- this is the tharpanam which is supposed to be done on the next dayafter annual Srarddha .This at present is being done after Srarddha on the sameday , because the priest does not have time to come the next day. Here thetharpanam is offered only to ones Pithru Varga (paternal side)[/FONT][FONT=&quot]4 Theregular tharpanam which is supposed to be done on all Amavasyas. Four Monthsbeginnings viz Mesha, Karkidaga, Thula and Makara and eclipses. Our Sastrashave asked us to perform tharpanam on 96 days in a year but this is not beingdone nowadays.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Severalacharyas have codified the method of tharpanam. Some of them are Apasthabha,Bodhayana, Drahyayana What is given below is the mantras and method of theApasthabha sutra.of Yajur veda. There are slight differences in the sankalpamamong Iyers and Iyengars. Both versions are given here. It is understood thatthe tharpanam for rig vedis is almost similar but that for Sanma Vedis isdifferent. There are also differences brought about by local practice andfamily tradition. People are advised to follow their traditions strictly. Theyhave precedence over what is written down here. For example in many familiestharpanam is done without wearing Vibhuti or Namam but there are certain familieswho do tharpanam wearing these. Some people do avahanams of Pithrus on twokoorchas. Some on one koorcha and some on spread durbhas..[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Thereare several rules regarding tharpanam though many of them are not beingfollowed by most of the people.. They are:-[/FONT][FONT=&quot]1. On theday of Tharpanam, till tharpanam is completed we are not supposed to drink/eatanything.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]2.On the dayof tharpanam, the daily rituals like Sandhya vandhana have to be firstperformed. Then before tharpanam one more bath has to be taken.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]3. Wet clothshould not be worn during tharpanam nor is it right to wear cloth which waswashed a day before and dried. The cloth has to be made wet the same day anddried. Pure white silk cloth can also be worn, but wearing this silk cloth youshould not have eaten any food. If wet cloth is not dry, it should be seven times shaken dry in windbefore wearing it.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]4. Exceptthe tharpanam during eclipse all other tharpanams are to be done after 12 noon.Considering the difficulty, our law givers have agreed that it can be doneafter 8.30 AM.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]5. Asmentioned earlier nothing should be eaten or drunk before performance ofTharpanam.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]6. Oblationsshould be done with hand full of water and not drops or spoon full of water.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]7. The watershould be poured out using the space between the thumb and the four fingers.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]8. Everytime a pinch of black til has to be taken. Care should be taken not to take itusing the thumb and the index finger.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]9. Pithru Tharpanamshould always be done with poonal hanging from the right shoulder to the leftside of the body.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]10. Thepavithram for pithru tharpanam should be made out of three durbha and thekoorcham should be made of 7 or 9 durbhas.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]11. Weshould preferably sit on seat made of durbha(durbhasanam) while doing tharpanamand in its absence put few durbhas on the place we are going to sit,[/FONT][FONT=&quot]12. Silvervessels are prescribed for used during tharpanam. If not available coppervessels can be used. Under no circumstance should steel or other metal vesselsare to be used.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]13.Tharpanam should be done facing east or south. It is believed that it eithershould be done in our homes or in public holy places like shore of the river,sea active you happen to do it in the place belonging to some one else. We aresupposed to compensate the owner of the property.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]14. IfAmavasya and the first of the month in which tharpanam has to be performedcomes on the same day, then tharpanam for the sankramanam(first of the month)should be done.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Source:Maruthi Sastrigal, Mumbai[/FONT]
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