• Welcome to Tamil Brahmins forums.

    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our Free Brahmin Community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

    If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact contact us.

Shraddha (Devasam)

Sir, Namaskaram
We are 3 brothers & 1 sister. All married and well settled. I am the 2[SUP]nd[/SUP] son of the family. My father passed away, when I was in college 1986. From that time on wards, my elder brother was doing Shraddha (Devasam) every year at home till my mother’s death 2015.
My mother’s first year Shraddha (devasam) was supposed to done at home, as suggested by sastrigal. So that all grandchildrens’ can attend. My elder suddenly changed the plan and did Shraddha (Devasam) at kasi. When I asked for the reason, he just ignore me and none of the grandchildrens’ could attend Shraddha (devasam), since it was performed at kasi. He also changed the sastrigal.
This year, he is planning to do at madam, now also when i asked, he just shouted ( you want to attend or not ) and ignored without explanation, but my wish , I wanted to be performed at home, so that all family members along with their childrens can get the blessings of my mother.
Being 2[SUP]nd[/SUP] son, I am helpless and respectless .Tell me anything I can do from my side.

Any Suggestions Please..
Faithfully
Shekar Balasubramanian
 

Raji Ram

Active member
From what I learnt from Sri. Gopalan Sir's posts:

SrAddham should be performed SEPARATELY by each brother,

if they live in different houses, even if they are neighbours.

I hope the doubt in OP is cleared.

Mrs. Raji Ram
 
OP
OP
B

bskrp

0
Good Morning and Thank You Mrs Raji Ram.

As far as i have heard from elders, that to do sradham or devasam separately, sastrigal will give dharbai taken from elder brother and give it to brothers by saying mantras. I do not know wheather it is true or not.

Shekar Balasubramanian
 

Raji Ram

Active member
In our family, after first year ceremony, all brothers are doing separately,

as per family sAsthrigaL's advice.
 
Sir, Namaskaram
We are 3 brothers & 1 sister. I am the 2[SUP]nd[/SUP] son of the family. My father passed away during November 2018. From that time on wards, my elder brother was doing Masiyam Sodakumbam at elder home till 6th month.I was also participated.My father’s varushabdigam to be done with all brothers jointly as suggested by family members and sastrigal. My elder brother suddenly changed the plan to do separately. But my wish , I wanted to be performed at home with my mother and younger brother so that all family members along with their childrens can get the blessings of my father.
Being 2[SUP]nd[/SUP] son, I am helpless and respectless .Tell me anything I can do from my side.

Any Suggestions Please..
 

Raji Ram

Active member
The second son can invite his younger brother and sister

for the annual ceremony. As long as the rituals are done

sincerely, no need to worry about anyone's comments.

This is my humble suggestion.

Mrs. Raji Ram
 

RSSARMA52

Active member
Sri Krishna!
As per the practical matter I share with you all.
Our Father passed away some 30 years back. At that time an issue happened that we three brothers and three sisters were there. We did all the rituals sooner as per Sastrigal's advice. But during the 11, 12 etc eldest brother could not do it as couple. So sastrigal asked me the 2nd Son to do it as couple.
Subsequently, other rituals have been conducted by my other two brothers as I was away in other state due to work constraints.
Our Brahmins should prepare a dictionary of rituals names with explanation for us to know. Like Oupasanam, soda kumbam etc. because we need what does it mean? We never come across these as long as our parents are with us.
When such a situation unexpected arise we knew it.
So also Oupasanam etc. during new born and other rituals we need what does mean.
For example Sandhyavandanam, and Gayathri Japam and Samitha dhanam etc. are our familiar pharses as we knew it meaning and on its just telling we know it.
In the interest of our Brahmin Community we need to know it.
Especially there need a Family Diary wherein the Name, Birth name, Poonal Namakaranam etc.are to be recorded by the family. So also wife parents, fore fathers and mothers lineage are very much necessary. Today with single child syndrome in every family it is very much necessary. Because there is no one to consult and no one go guide about your family. Especially with our parents when they are "ava periyappa or other family "thaththu koduththu irundhal" that family detials are required.
Our Brahmin Community should prepare a Brahmin Family Passport of lineage that we are able to record the details.
It so happened that when I was away on work constraints my family used to give dhanam to near the temple priest by giving the father in laws regular name. Then once I was at home and we went to temple to do it then I told his religious name. My wife said she doesn't know it. I said don't worry whatever has happened has happened and God knows our intention more than action.
 

RSSARMA52

Active member
To further the subject:
When my mother passed away after about 30 years. During first Varushabhdeegam there was difficulty in travelling. So I asked our Sastrigal about performing the Varushabdeegam. First he heard but did not know that I am not the first son. Then he said you have no right to do it alone separately. You should join your Elder brother in the rituals. After the first year you can do separately.
Secondly, for my mothers parents, my Grand Father and Grand Mother, I lived in their same city. My Elder uncle do it and my younger uncle used to inform me about it that they are performing it together at my Elder uncle's house. I used to go there to attend and take food.
So these are all the practical matters.
 
Top
Thank you for visiting TamilBrahmins.com

You seem to have an Ad Blocker on.

We depend on advertising to keep our content free for you. Please consider whitelisting us in your ad blocker so that we can continue to provide the content you have come here to enjoy.

Alternatively, consider upgrading your account to enjoy an ad-free experience along with numerous other benefits. To upgrade your account, please visit the account upgrades page

You can also donate financially if you can. Please Click Here on how you can do that.

I've Disabled AdBlock    No Thanks