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Senior citizens are getting married and NO they are not embarrassed!

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prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
Age is no bar for senior citizens to marry for the first time or re-marry to have company for the rest of their life, especially in old age, as evident from the good response to a matrimonial meet held here on Sunday for elders.

"About 250 senior citizens above 50-60 years, including 150 men and 100 women came to the match-making event here. We are moved by the response, as senior citizens, including single, widowed or divorced came in search of a companion," Anubhandana Foundation member Bharatbhai Patel told reporters here on Monday.

Admitting that having company in old age is a major social problem for the senior citizens, living alone or away from children, Patel said the Ahmedabad-based foundation had been organising such events in a few cities across the country to enable elderly people find a suitable companion and lead a meaningful life.

"Though the response this time has been 50 less than the 300 when the event was hosted here for the first time in January 2014, the participants have come from other parts of Karnataka, including Mangaluru, Hubballi, Mysuru and Raichur," Patel recalled. The oldest person among men was 78 years and among women it was a woman of 55 years.

Among the participants, about 10 got engaged at the venue and a dozen agreed to meet again to decide on when to tie the knot. Several others registered their details with the foundation to help them find a suitable companion from its database in other cities.

"Nuclear families, career pursuits and changing lifestyle have been disrupting the life of senior citizens as their sons and daughters leave them behind after education on getting jobs or on getting married and then they live separately in the same city or other cities in India or abroad," Patel said.

While the majority of senior citizens belonging to the middle class are financially sound or self-sufficient, it is loneliness or lack of company that makes them marry again even from other communities, cutting across social barriers of caste and creed.

"We are doing our best to ensure single citizens get a compatible person to live with them in the evening of their life and help each other in old age. More than money, it's care and love that matters the most in old age for such citizens, who live on their own or away from their kin," Patel noted.


"Besides facilitating the coming together of aged citizens, we provide counselling service and assist the re-married couple to register their names and other details at their respective marriage bureaus in the sub-registrar offices.



According to foundation secretary Gouri Shankar, the not-for-profit organisation provides a platform for senior citizens to meet, interact and decide whom to choose as a partner and how soon they would like to live together.



Regretting that more and more elderly people were being left to fend themselves or neglected by their kin, human rights activist Uday Kumar said not many children of the present generation cared for their ageing parents, irrespective of their status -- divorced or widowed.



"As leading a lonely life in old age is worrisome, I am glad the foundation had organised the matrimonial event to meet my future partner," said M. Shankarappa, one of the participants.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/...-are-not-embarrassed/articleshow/52847932.cms
 

kunjuppu

Well-known member
this is fairly common in many societies, both west and east. but not in india so far.

this brings up new issues, especially re inheritance of property. care must be taken to ensure that the children of the first marriage are not deprived of their dues, due to the scheming of the new spouses. has happened time and again.
 

krish44

Gold Member
Gold Member
Why should senior citizen be embarrassed to marry again?

If they have settled their children and are unfortunately single due to various reasons, it is reasonable that they should look for company.

Where is the question of dues or property for children if parents have earned it and children are educated with a job?

I am against the concept of inheritance.

If senior marries again then second wife/husband gets all for putting up with a senior citizen
 
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prasad1

prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
this is fairly common in many societies, both west and east. but not in india so far.

this brings up new issues, especially re inheritance of property. care must be taken to ensure that the children of the first marriage are not deprived of their dues, due to the scheming of the new spouses. has happened time and again.

Because the children think that they are entitled to the "inheritance" they are not supportive of their widowed parent getting married agains. This is a new concept in India, and will take some time to be accepted.
 

yesmohan

Well-known member
Without pretending to and any prejudice ………..for the society around, the courage / guts to marry at any stage of the age by legal way, is appreciable in a way.
 

kunjuppu

Well-known member
Because the children think that they are entitled to the "inheritance" they are not supportive of their widowed parent getting married agains. This is a new concept in India, and will take some time to be accepted.

personally, i feel, it is ok for the children to have a sense of entitlement over parents' property, all else being equal.

the other party might have the same issues or concerns.

the trouble comes, when the woman is after the man's wealth. and tries to deny the children of the inheritance, or get it all for her children. that is why, in senior marriages, it is best, the will is written and there is a pre nuptial agreement.

talk it out in the open and clear the air. do not let smoke smoulder and spoil the potential for a good relationship and companionship.

no secret agendas :)
 

vgane

Well-known member
personally, i feel, it is ok for the children to have a sense of entitlement over parents' property, all else being equal.

the other party might have the same issues or concerns.

the trouble comes, when the woman is after the man's wealth. and tries to deny the children of the inheritance, or get it all for her children. that is why, in senior marriages, it is best, the will is written and there is a pre nuptial agreement.

talk it out in the open and clear the air. do not let smoke smoulder and spoil the potential for a good relationship and companionship.

no secret agendas :)


Well said! I agree
 
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prasad1

prasad1

Gold Member
Gold Member
personally, i feel, it is ok for the children to have a sense of entitlement over parents' property, all else being equal.

the other party might have the same issues or concerns.

the trouble comes, when the woman is after the man's wealth. and tries to deny the children of the inheritance, or get it all for her children. that is why, in senior marriages, it is best, the will is written and there is a pre nuptial agreement.

talk it out in the open and clear the air. do not let smoke smoulder and spoil the potential for a good relationship and companionship.

no secret agendas :)

I do not agree that any one is "entitled" to the inheritance they get. The recipient should be gracious to accept it, but has no right to demand it.
People should watch the movie Bagbhan.

Baghban is a 2003 Bollywood drama film directed by Ravi Chopra, featuring Salman Khan, Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini in lead roles. Aman Verma, Samir Soni, Saahil Chadha and Nasir Kazi portray Bachchan and Malini's four sons. Mahima Chaudhry, Paresh Rawal, Rimi Sen and Lilette Dubey are featured in supporting roles. It is an unofficial adaptation of the 1937 movieMake Way for Tomorrow and many scenes and the plot were inspired from the 1954 Marathi movie Oon Paoos and 1958 Kannada film School Master. It has similar theme as the Hindi film Avtaar. It released to cinemas on 3 October 2003
This film was remade in Kannada as Ee Bandhana in 2007 starring Vishnuvardhan and Jaya Pradha in the leads. Baghban was originally a remake of Oon Paoos, a Marathi film. Raja Paranjape was the lead actor and director of Oon Paoos. It explores themes that are prevalent in the play King Lear by Shakespeare, because Raj suffers much pain and duress at the hands of his children.

 

yesmohan

Well-known member
Many TB boys ( ? ) envy at, in reading this thread as they are approaching the senior citizens status while in waiting " Q " for marriage !!
 

kunjuppu

Well-known member
I do not agree that any one is "entitled" to the inheritance they get. The recipient should be gracious to accept it, but has no right to demand it.
People should watch the movie Bagbhan.

Baghban is a 2003 Bollywood drama film directed by Ravi Chopra, featuring Salman Khan, Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini in lead roles. Aman Verma, Samir Soni, Saahil Chadha and Nasir Kazi portray Bachchan and Malini's four sons. Mahima Chaudhry, Paresh Rawal, Rimi Sen and Lilette Dubey are featured in supporting roles. It is an unofficial adaptation of the 1937 movieMake Way for Tomorrow and many scenes and the plot were inspired from the 1954 Marathi movie Oon Paoos and 1958 Kannada film School Master. It has similar theme as the Hindi film Avtaar. It released to cinemas on 3 October 2003
This film was remade in Kannada as Ee Bandhana in 2007 starring Vishnuvardhan and Jaya Pradha in the leads. Baghban was originally a remake of Oon Paoos, a Marathi film. Raja Paranjape was the lead actor and director of Oon Paoos. It explores themes that are prevalent in the play King Lear by Shakespeare, because Raj suffers much pain and duress at the hands of his children.


dear prasad,

it is only natural, i think, for children, to view the parents' wealth, as something to be inherited. under normal circumstances, and relationships.

having said this, some parents may leave extensively to charity. that again, might be acceptable to children, if they are financially independent.

but, for a father, to leave his wealth, to a lady whom he married late in life, and to HER children. i feel is not fair.

this has happened to a friend of mine at work. chinese. both parents in late 70s. the father had a surgery, and fell in love, with a chinese nurse (in toronto). on discharge, he told his wife to move out, and got the nurse in. and changed his will and told his two daughters & wife of the same.

the poor mother was devastated. as the father's money was self made, no legal recourse could be had. the two daughters, took care of the mother, till her death.
 
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