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Rituals for a Marriage between Iyengar Girl & Iyer boy- How it should be conducted?

Raji Ram

Active member
The groom's side custom has to be followed, normally!

But, it depends on how 'strong' the bride's side is!! :boink:
If the question has come up in this forum, then most likely there is a debate among the concerned parties. I would say see if you can try to compromise and strike a balance (assuming the rituals permit and not an expert there) by trying to see if you can do a few of both or may be all of both :) if you time/money/patience permits. Most likely 20+ years from now you would be laughing at even having to debate it, but for now, it is important to get both parties to hit it off in a good note.


Active member
Request the forum to clarify on the above subject. Whether the rituals should be conducted according to boy side customs or girl side customs?


In my family, I have witnessed 2 such marriages. Both were a compromise between the two sets of parents and their priests.
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in muslim /christian weddings boy has to convert....so if iyer boy want marry iyengar gal....the boy has to convert iyengar first..

everything depend on money power now a days..
It is normally grooms caste rituals that take precedence. Some rituals from brides caste also get included to appease the girls parents.Sometimes girls end up with multiple

thaali tying to please both sides.Even madisars are worn by the girl as per the requirement of grooms family.Purohits of both castes perform at the wedding .But vaishnavite

purohits take precedence over saivite .It ultimately becomes a bit of hotch potch with bride and the groom both getting bored with time consuming rituals of iyers and

iyengars. It takes quite a bit of time for the girl to adjust to the familiy of boy in terms of pujas, food and other requirements of boys family if they live together under the

same roof.
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