Intercaste marriage is it possible?

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if the groom is an african american or hispanic or asian or a muslim white guy or arab ? what would be your reaction?LOL

hi doctor,

i dont like BMW.....u know ....BLACK/MUSLIM/WHITE.....its hard for me...this is my reaction..lol

 

[renuka]

[/QUOTE]

Objection your honor, ma'am. This is popular advice, and I don't like it. Why does marrying your own kind have to be a 'sacrifice'? Why does someone have to bury their feelings and marry into one's own caste half heartedly? Why doesn't nobody point out that this is not "love", but simple, plain old lust?? This word 'love' has been deeply sullied and excessively romanticized, precisely for more of these scenarios to happen. What happens between two hormonal teenagers or two young adults is not love. It's only lust. Love can happen at any age, between anyone, even animals.

It's really sad to see that Brahmins are totally totally clueless about this. Tamil society harasses Brahmin men and glorifies non Brahmin men, thereby encouraging more of these things to happen. Showing Brahmin men as weak, cunning people, and other nb men as tough, humble people with positive attributes. If you notice all the movies, the parents and menfolk of the girl are shown as comedy characters. I'm sure she or her father are also TOTALLY ignorant about the surge of deep anti-brahmin hatred in tamilnadu in recent times. If she knew what brahmin men have to go through, she wouldn't have asked this question.

I'm not a doctor,but I can try to give a doctor-ish response from Google. A Woman has to protected by the menfolk of her clan. Period. Lack of that creates shamelessness in women. Y-chromosome comes only from males. All the nb's of society are conspiring to create a condition that is favorable for upper caste women to "fall in love" with lower caste men, getting the better genes for themselves. The very sense of shame in a girl's mind is imparted only by the males. EVERY ONE does this except Brahmins. In the மெதப்பு of being progressive.

If I'm harsh, excuse me, but I'm so concerned because im also Iyengar, and I'm aware of these things. If anybody is hurt, உங்க மனசு புண்படும்னு பாத்துட்ருந்தா நாங்க தலை ல துண்டு போட்டுக்க வேண்டியது தான்.

You are entitled to your opinion.

But please be reminded that a woman does not need a male to protect her from anyone...in fact its a man that needs a woman to protect him for almost 9 months in her uterus.

Love or lust or anything you call it is the design of nature for continuation of species..its the same for all humans.

Coming to who has better genes that is also very normal for a human to have very high attachment to his body thinking that he is indeed the best of creation...you are not the 1st one to say this...even other races in the world too have this feeling eg for a white supremacist everyone else of any shade that isnt white is inferior and the even Hitler thought he had superior genes and killed so many people.

So this is not an unknown condition.

Get well soon.

 

[Jaykay767]

Agree with Renukaji. Absolutely repeat absolutely NO place for any supremacist or racist or casteist comments.

 

[Jaykay767]

Debate can be focused on pros and cons of any decision but without bashing other communities and people.

 

[renuka]

I'm not a doctor,but I can try to give a doctor-ish response from Google. A Woman has to protected by the menfolk of her clan. Period. Lack of that creates shamelessness in women. Y-chromosome comes only from males. All the nb's of society are conspiring to create a condition that is favorable for upper caste women to "fall in love" with lower caste men, getting the better genes for themselves. The very sense of shame in a girl's mind is imparted only by the males. EVERY ONE does this except Brahmins. In the மெதப்பு of being progressive.

Y chromosomes come only from males..yes..true..but you still need an X chromosome from a female to even call yourself a male.

There is no organism with a YY running around the world.

The XXY is Klinefelter syndrome which is a male that exhibits feminine characteristics and diminished masculine characteristics...overall behavior normal with gentle behavior.

The XO is Turner syndrome a women who has a lack of X chromosome and shows features of lower IQ and also infertility due ovarian failure...but overall behavior is normal.

now lets get to the XYY..the syndrome in which there is an extra Y chromosome..these are the aggressive males and many criminals/serial killers have shown to have XYY ..just too aggressive...just 1 extra YY and you get a human who is almost a criminal.

and a YY is not compatible with life and does not exists.


Conclusion : It is the X chromosome from the female that confers the gentleness and sense of shyness or shame or being soft and kind.

If you know Sanskrit you would understand that the word Stri meaning a woman is made up of the the 3 gunas :

Sattva (S)
Tamas(T)
Rajas(R)

That is a female is mainly Sattva for her being the gender to bring about life and she is naturally having more love and compassion.

Next is Tamas...this quality gives her the shyness and sense of shame.

Rajas...the aggression in a woman is very less.


So if you know biology or Sanskrit or both...you would understand that the sense of shame or shyness is naturally present in a woman and in no way is a man playing any role to impart the sense of shame in a woman.

What you have is just the primitive male mindset where he thinks he owns a woman and she would misbehave if a man is not there to teach her.

Then some males go one step further and start quoting Arjuna in the Bhagavad Geeta where he says "

TEXT 40
adharmabhibhavat krsna
pradusyanti kula-striyah
strisu dustasu varsneya
jayate varna-sankarah
SYNONYMS

TRANSLATION
When irreligion is prominent in the family, O Krsna, the women of the family become corrupt, and from the degradation of womanhood, O descendant of Vrsni, comes unwanted progeny.



But all forget to read the reply Lord Krishna gives Arjuna.

TEXT 2
sri-bhagavan uvaca
kutas tva kasmalam idam
visame samupasthitam
anarya-justam asvargyam
akirti-karam arjuna

TRANSLATION
The Supreme Person [Bhagavan] said: My dear Arjuna, how have these impurities come upon you? They are not at all befitting a man who knows the progressive values of life. They do not lead to higher planets, but to infamy.



Krishna never really supports what Arjuna told and never degraded the character of women.


So Gokul...be a Krishna since your name is Gokul.

 

[mr.gokul]

Y chromosomes come only from males..yes..true..but you still need an X chromosome from a female to even call yourself a male.

There is no organism with a YY running around the world.

The XXY is Klinefelter syndrome which is a male that exhibits feminine characteristics and diminished masculine characteristics...overall behavior normal with gentle behavior.
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Then some males go one step further and start quoting Arjuna in the Bhagavad Geeta where he says "

TEXT 40
adharmabhibhavat krsna
pradusyanti kula-striyah
strisu dustasu varsneya
jayate varna-sankarah
SYNONYMS

TRANSLATION
When irreligion is prominent in the family, O Krsna, the women of the family become corrupt, and from the degradation of womanhood, O descendant of Vrsni, comes unwanted progeny.

Krishna never really supports what Arjuna told and never degraded the character of women.
So Gokul...be a Krishna since your name is Gokul.

Thanks for your interest ma'am. Like i said, i realize im being paranoid, but its because the girl belongs to the same caste as me, and i have been cursed with having eyes that are open. I think its this excessive obsession with decency/niceties AT THE COST OF THE VITAL DUTIES has to be relaxed. We have to handle tough and ugly things too.

And i was trying to go into biology to explain what was happening. I think your explanations were somewhat vague. Shame is not the same as shyness. Shame in a woman is imparted only by her menfolk. The men have to tell her what is right, and what is not. Do you know why? Simple. Because the way a male get sexual arousal on seeing a female (generally), only the males know. The female has no way of actually knowing how a male feels. And this is PRECISELY the reason why the society shows brahmin males in poor light. See your tamil movies. The father and brothers (males) are always losers/comedy or villains. And the lower caste guy is humble, strong, just (!), etc etc. So that the girl develops disgust/awkwardness towards her own men, and "love" towards the lower caste men. And even if she marries her own caste guy, its after "burying her feelings".

If the men of a clan lower their defenses, what happens is standard, and this should give us a hint why the defenses should be kept up - Lower caste men rushing to marry upper caste women. Why this mad rush? Does it not show that they know upper caste women to be a valuable commodity? They are using social/democratic pressure to weaken the males, so that the females will follow their nature's instinct and increasingly marry other males. We cant change anything, but we have to at least resist, no. I know all this sounds medieval, but thats where our value systems come from, and thats the core from where religion comes from, too. No point following rituals and religious customs strictly after messing up the core.

A lot of women also try to squeeze the most out the brahmin tag, still sticking on the slang, the customs, the "brahminness", even after having married out, making total, total losers of B's. We have to at least resist.

Last, but not the least,

"Modesty died in women, when jealousy died in men."
- Shaykh al-Albani (رحمه الله)

Thanks and Regards,
Gokul

 

[Ganesh_Iyer]

I am iyengar girl (22) . I am in love with backward caste boy (24)for a year we know each other very well . He said if my parents agree he will marry me definitely. Can you people guide whether he is good for me?

Try to get married within our community . Tamil films are spoiling Bramin community by showing wrong examples. Youngsters are getting distracted by social media. Your parents will be the best guide who will find suitable match . Best wishes .

 

[renuka]

Thanks for your interest ma'am. Like i said, i realize im being paranoid, but its because the girl belongs to the same caste as me, and i have been cursed with having eyes that are open. I think its this excessive obsession with decency/niceties AT THE COST OF THE VITAL DUTIES has to be relaxed. We have to handle tough and ugly things too.

And i was trying to go into biology to explain what was happening. I think your explanations were somewhat vague. Shame is not the same as shyness. Shame in a woman is imparted only by her menfolk. The men have to tell her what is right, and what is not. Do you know why? Simple. Because the way a male get sexual arousal on seeing a female (generally), only the males know. The female has no way of actually knowing how a male feels. And this is PRECISELY the reason why the society shows brahmin males in poor light. See your tamil movies. The father and brothers (males) are always losers/comedy or villains. And the lower caste guy is humble, strong, just (!), etc etc. So that the girl develops disgust/awkwardness towards her own men, and "love" towards the lower caste men. And even if she marries her own caste guy, its after "burying her feelings".

If the men of a clan lower their defenses, what happens is standard, and this should give us a hint why the defenses should be kept up - Lower caste men rushing to marry upper caste women. Why this mad rush? Does it not show that they know upper caste women to be a valuable commodity? They are using social/democratic pressure to weaken the males, so that the females will follow their nature's instinct and increasingly marry other males. We cant change anything, but we have to at least resist, no. I know all this sounds medieval, but thats where our value systems come from, and thats the core from where religion comes from, too. No point following rituals and religious customs strictly after messing up the core.

A lot of women also try to squeeze the most out the brahmin tag, still sticking on the slang, the customs, the "brahminness", even after having married out, making total, total losers of B's. We have to at least resist.

Last, but not the least,

"Modesty died in women, when jealousy died in men."
- Shaykh al-Albani (رحمه الله)

Thanks and Regards,
Gokul

God didnt make a male with extra brains to teach a female anything.
Before DNA paternity tests were there a male had to depend on the mother to even know who his father is.

You said that a female has no idea how a male feels biologically...well let me tell u know..unless you are are Ardhanarishwara you wont know how a female brains work or what is child birth pains too.

Simple! Your bodily experienced is yours!
Another male wont be like you too cos in your eyes another male is trying to steal your genes to improve their genes.

So that shows how another male feels is not the same as you.

You seem upset that I advised Ms Priyanka to marry a Brahmin cos u didnt want a Brahmin male to be a 2nd choice.

Wake up boy...life isnt just Black and White
Ms Priyanka and her boyfriend are both decent people who want advise of elders and not wanting to hurt her parents.
He is not forcing her to marry him.
She is decent too and did not put down any tradition or look down upon her own culture..so both of them should be guided well.

My advise to her is to marry her own community as it will keep her parents happy and she herself is a bit unsure of her feelings for him.

Its not a crime or a sin or shameless to feel love or attachment or a crush on someone.
Its perfectly human.

So stop thinking a woman needs to be taught shame by a man.

Surprised you think that way..usually only violent mindset males think this way...surprising a young man thinks this way ...may be you feel your community is portrayed badly by movies hence it affected you.

But you should know your worth...just let go the grip of trying to think that a male has to control a female...teach her to sit! sit! stand! stand! go fetch the stick!

Remember if you think that thats all there is to a woman...then she can bite!


Since you quoted an Arab proverb...well Arab males are well known for guarding their females but they keep marrying any other race women.

So its the same...double standards.
Just like all bollywood movies are Indian Hindu guy and Pakistani muslim girl.

From Henna to Veer Zara

You wont find a movie of Hindu girl and Pakistani male.

Its a male mentality of wanting their women to only marry their own kind but males are free to do as they please.

 

[mr.gokul]

You seem upset that I advised Ms Priyanka to marry a Brahmin cos u didnt want a Brahmin male to be a 2nd choice.

Wake up boy...life isnt just Black and White
Ms Priyanka and her boyfriend are both decent people who want advise of elders and not wanting to hurt her parents.
He is not forcing her to marry him.
She is decent too and did not put down any tradition or look down upon her own culture..so both of them should be guided well.

My advise to her is to marry her own community as it will keep her parents happy and she herself is a bit unsure of her feelings for him.

Its not a crime or a sin or shameless to feel love or attachment or a crush on someone.
Its perfectly human.

So stop thinking a woman needs to be taught shame by a man.

Surprised you think that way..usually only violent mindset males think this way...surprising a young man thinks this way ...may be you feel your community is portrayed badly by movies hence it affected you.

Ok ma'am I think you're not B. This SOS and pain that we feel is missing... For a brahmin girl these days, for every one guy like me, there will be 1000 people saying the opposite things.

Generally, all girls and guys at and after adolescence will feel love,crush etc. Just a small experiment. Ask that guy how many women in his family have married lower caste/dalit women. I'm guessing they might get enraged even for asking. Yena avanga ushaaru. Avanga veetla solli valapaanga. And please, marriage is NOT a personal affair!! Who said that? Do you need to tie a yellow string to have sex? Theoretically, Marriage is not purely for personal satisfaction, either, IMO.
But if some woman marries in own caste after "loving" someone, just to keep parents happy, I think that's a very ugly thing. They better run away. avalo scene illa. I'm only concerned about overall picture.

(Generous amounts of salt on the wounds if the guy/family are DMK/periyarists. I have seen a few like that. If i/girl's father had imparted the anger/pain of these incidents to the girl, such "love" would be less likely). Intercaste in other castes is taken very seriously. This 'brahmins-dont-do-that' scene pottufying has to go.

 

[renuka]

Ok ma'am I think you're not B. This SOS and pain that we feel is missing... For a brahmin girl these days, for every one guy like me, there will be 1000 people saying the opposite things.

Generally, all girls and guys at and after adolescence will feel love,crush etc. Just a small experiment. Ask that guy how many women in his family have married lower caste/dalit women. I'm guessing they might get enraged even for asking. Yena avanga ushaaru. Avanga veetla solli valapaanga. And please, marriage is NOT a personal affair!! Who said that? Do you need to tie a yellow string to have sex? Theoretically, Marriage is not purely for personal satisfaction, either, IMO.
But if some woman marries in own caste after "loving" someone, just to keep parents happy, I think that's a very ugly thing. They better run away. avalo scene illa. I'm only concerned about overall picture.

(Generous amounts of salt on the wounds if the guy/family are DMK/periyarists. I have seen a few like that. If i/girl's father had imparted the anger/pain of these incidents to the girl, such "love" would be less likely). Intercaste in other castes is taken very seriously. This 'brahmins-dont-do-that' scene pottufying has to go.

Dear Gokul..


I think.since you are a new member you might not know much about me.
All senior members here know I am not a Tamil Brahmin and I am not an Indian citizen.

I am not an atheist or EVRist or anything like that.

I only advised Ms Priyanka to marry a Brahmin boy cos its the best for her since she is not sure of her feelings and it will keep parents happy too.

Now...you said its better for a woman to elope( run away) instead of marrying her own caste after having loved another caste guy.

Now this you are saying out of anger.

Young people can have crushes or even love or even make mistakes...that doesnt mean they have to just run away with whomever they felt attracted too.

This kind of thinking has to stop.
As Hindus be it Brahmin or Non Brahmin the tendency to put pride and prestige of family honor is very high hence sometimes problems are not addressed and youngsters could commit blunders.

By just asking a woman to run away like that...thats not good for anyone.

Also Ms Prinyaka and her friend both do not intend to do that...they are decent individuals.

In other religion communities eg Christianity...any problem is handled by the church and host of people who give supportive answers.

So why should a Hindu miss a chance for a supportive answer?
I might not be a Tamil Brahmin but my answer is a well thought out one for Ms Priynka cos she isnt sure of her feelings..she has some fear too...so that shows it isnt deep love yet ..so she wants advise and majority here are advising her to marry her own community cos thats the best solution for her since she is unsure of her feelings.

In india an intercaste marriage isnt as easy thing.
The members here whose kids had intercaste or interacial or inter religious marriage are mostly settled abroad so scenario is different.

Anyway thanks for all your replies but remember never ever advise anyone to elope and marry.
Marriage should be always be conducted in its rightful manner.
That is true culture.

 

[Lotusinsanskrit]

Quote
I onlyadvised Ms Priyanka to marry a Brahmin boy cos its the best for her since she is not sure of her feelings and it will keep parents happy too.
unquote

i agree with that the girl is still hesitant and have dominate edge and we can see this from her first post and her selective answers only to a member of her own caste, that too, after a very long time and after many opinions.

also I agree to mr gokul why it should be a second choice when the first one did not materialise for some reason or other and also agree to his views that it will spoil the dreams of a some young boy.

In my earlier reply (only one reply in this thread) itself I felt that she should have told either the caste of the boy or simply should have told inter caste and why she should say backward caste and that shows her narrow mindedness in caste system.

 

[renuka]

Quote
I onlyadvised Ms Priyanka to marry a Brahmin boy cos its the best for her since she is not sure of her feelings and it will keep parents happy too.
unquote

i agree with that the girl is still hesitant and have dominate edge and we can see this from her first post and her selective answers only to a member of her own caste, that too, after a very long time and after many opinions.

also I agree to mr gokul why it should be a second choice when the first one did not materialise for some reason or other and also agree to his views that it will spoil the dreams of a some young boy.

In my earlier reply (only one reply in this thread) itself I felt that she should have told either the caste of the boy or simply should have told inter caste and why she should say backward caste and that shows her narrow mindedness in caste system.

I think backward caste is the terms used by the Indian Government to classify communities that are socially or economically disadvantaged.

Technically its not meant to be an insult as far as I know.

 

[Lotusinsanskrit]

I think backward caste is the terms used by the Indian Government to classify communities that are socially or economically disadvantaged.

Technically its not meant to be an insult as far as I know.

It may not be so. What indian government say about economically backwardness as other backward class for employment and education and that is not same as TN caste system where it is in different tires and hence she wanted to specify for the understanding of others on which tire he belongs to.

 

[mr.gokul]

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....or simply should have told inter caste and why she should say backward caste and that shows her narrow mindedness in caste system.

Many times, its the guys in a fake profile. Just laughing at us fools going crazy. Harassment is much much worse on quora and TN social media in general. We can manage that, but if they are getting to the women, the heart of any community, and the parents are just going to say "their life is theirs", I have to say im ashamed to be a Brahmin "MALE". If i was also a girl, naanum jollya odi poirkalam.

Otherwise, she is in "love". 'Moha' is the state in which the mind doesnt work. Now, they will be under the influence of the other person. This is just nature, that the society has been rigged to call "love", and over romanticize. That love is also nothing but natural/sexual selection, and follows rules too. This sexual attraction can be rigged by social pressure, which has been happening. Against brahmin MEN by tamil society. Weakening the men, so the women will marry other caste guys. And our folks cant open their eyes and see that the other guys are protective about THEIR WOMEN. Progressiveness only for upper caste women.

Only the parents should be cautious. And who has to tell the parents?? The b-community at large. Like i have been saying, all the other castes do this diligently. And in my observation, there is a systematic love jihad for brahmin girls by christians. I have seen this in my circles. In absence of this social pressure, nature's instincts will have their way. They have taken all the brahmins for fools. Parents, and the b-community are to blame. They care only for personal happiness. Marriage is not a personal affair.

IMO, if the other caste guy is a very nice guy, will take care of your girl like a diamond till she dies, is willing to turn full veg, etc... then its actually worse. Because, if not, we will at least have some way of dissuading the girl. If he is 'sokka thangam', in the absense of vekkam-maanam-soodu-soranai, we will have NO WAY of keeping our people on track. Nothing to dissuade such "love"s. B's have had no social consciousness. If this trend continues, we will be extinct, or worse. I think k.balachandar directed 'arangetram' only as a warning sign to over-conservative brahmins. As if to say "nee ipdiye irundha, inga dhan poi mudiyum".