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Who has more responsibility/authority t Thevasam when Amma is dead & Appa is alive

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Who has more responsibility/authority t Thevasam when Amma is dead & Appa is alive

In our family, my mother passed away at a young age. My father is alive. Every year, when it comes to Amma's Thevasam, there is a constant discussion around who needs to be more responsible to perform the Thevasam.

I am not discussing here on whether we should do Thevasam or not. But it is more of responsibility.

When father is alive and mother is dead, who has more authority/responsiblity to do Thevasam. Is it the Father or the Son?

Also, is it right to do the Thevasam in a different country if the son is travelling? In other words, who should be definitely present in the Thevasam ceremony?

Regards!
 
Ram Ram ,

dharmasasthra lists 33 Karthas for pitru kariyams in a specific order. Son comes first. In case of having a son , A husband has no right in his wife's funeral and thevasams. It is definetly on the son's part. The only thing that a husband of the deceased can do is performing tharpanams . A son cannot perform tharpanam until his father is alive.

Performing devasam in different country is not advisable. but no other go ,perform it in the visiting country and after coming back to india perform once again . consult aathu vadhyar.

Thanks,
Arun M
 
தகப்பனார் அவரது தாயார் தகபனாருக்கெ தெவசம் செய்ய முடியும். மனைவிக்கு செய்ய முடியாது. பிள்லை யே தாயாருக்கு செய்ய வேண்டும். ஒவ்வொரு ஆண் மகனும் தனி தனியாக அவர்களாது தாயாருக்கு சிராத்தம் செய்ய வேண்டும். வெளீ நாட்டில் இருந்தாலும் அங்கும் செய்து விட்டு இங்கு வந்தவுடன் இங்கும் செய்ய வேண்டும்...
 
I agree with Mr.Gopalans wordings. The father has no right to do srartham or tharpanam to his wife. He can do sratham or tharpanam to his mother.
The eldest son is having right to do srartham. It is not advisable to do srarrham in aborad. If in an unavoidable circumstsances the srasrtham can be performed
on the thithi in abroad. But he should do the srastham once again after he returns to home country i.e India.

If all the brothers are living as a joint family then it is enough that the eldest son do the sratham. If they are living seperately then they should do srartham seperately.
Till the father alive they have no right to do tharpanam even on the srartham date.

Rajappa Namakkal
 
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