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  1. #1
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    pithru karyam performance at home

    I am a tamil brahmin who has moved to chennai recently.

    I have observed that in chennai, the owners (especially if they are brahmins) do not allow pithru karyams like masyam and shrardham ( I am not talking about the first 13 days rituals after death) to be performed at home by the tenants. This is not the case in other cities outside tamil nadu. I have stayed in mumbai and hyderabad, where people are most acceptable and friendly.

    I have also observed majority people doing pithru karyams at public venues reserved for this purpose. Shouldn't this be the last resort? that is, if there are unavoidable circumstances at home, one can understand. It is considered auspicious if these rituals are performed at home. can someone tell me why chennai isn't open to it?
    Last edited by vijay70; 23-10-2009 at 03:51 PM.
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    There is nothing wrong in doing outside,Infact observance of the ceremonies is more important than the place.Many may argue that it has to be done at home but that has no basis.nowadays people are away from their home and stay in rented apartments.There are good facilities available in major cities thanks to the kind coutesy of ashtheegas and brahmin associations.I am sure chennai should have very good facilities for such thing.
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    thanks for the prompt response

    Sir,

    I thank you for your prompt response. My basic question is why object to people (more in case of tenants) doing these ceremonies at home. I have nothing against people performing these rituals at selected venues.
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  6. #4
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    I don't understand why the owner's that too brahmin do not let these to be conducted at home. If brahmins themsleves abhor such things who else will and should support. What are the harms in Pithru karyams doing in the home? In fact such occassions are to be forcibly allowed to be done on the homes [ provided enough minium space and basic facillities are available] the home and dewellers will get the assirvadahams from Pithrus, I have heard from elders. Suppose owing to lack of space and other amenities and if could be sourced elsewhere such as Gnanavapis and the kartha wishes to do outside that is understandable. Brahmin refusing another brahmin to carry on his rituals, but will collects the rent part willingly, is not desirable quality.
    Last edited by drsundaram; 23-10-2009 at 04:51 PM.
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    Glad to read that

    Dear Dr. Sundaram,

    I appreciate your response. However, it is a fact that people of our (brahmin) community do not support tenants to perform pithru karyams at rented houses in tamil nadu. Even if adequate facilities exist. It is sad, but true.

    Venues where these are being performed at times lack amenities or people do it on contract bases without sincerity. It hurts people those who want to follow these rituals sincerely. I once again thank you for putting forward the truth.
    Last edited by vijay70; 23-10-2009 at 05:11 PM. Reason: change title
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  10. #6
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    Dear Vijay sir,

    I dont know how you said like with a few incidents the whole chennai brahmin houseowners are like this. I know many of the owners who even provided some rooms for preparing madisamayal in their house and help the tenants. Might be everywhere some narrowminded people are there. But, dont create this as the image of chennai at all. Might be you have not chosen the proper house. Iam here for past 10 years, I have not heard any such incidents. When we were in tenant house in perambur, my thatha performed all srartha ceremonies thereonly.

    If at all, houseowners say like this, might be the reasosn are (which you are curious to know)

    1. water scarcity
    2. avoidance of overcrowd
    3. over aachara requirement for these kind of ceremonies

    Finally, ignorant knowledge of thinking pitru karya (apara karya) as a bad thing, instead of a homa and pooja...I accept with you that there are some people like that. At the sametime, dont make your personal experiences as a general statement

    We are in an independt own-house. No tenants there. So, please dont think that am fair for houseowners...


    Pranams
    Kann Kalikkumpadi kandukonden Kadambadaviyil
    pann kalikkum kural veenaiyum kaiyum payodharamum
    mann kalikkum pachai vannamum aghi mathangar kula
    penngalil thondria emperumaatithan perazhage

    (Abirami Andhadhi)
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  12. #7
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    folks,

    i think, we are confusing, our emotions with our actions.

    what difference does it make where we do the rituals, as long as we do it, in good faith, and to the best of our ability?

    i did karyams for 4 pithurs - one at my home, second and third at brahma theerthams and the 4th at toronto temple.

    don't blame the landlords and explode it into a community grief.

    there could be myriads of sentiments including our own general belief that anything to do with pithrus is கெட்ட கார்யம்

    the important thing, is that you wish to do your karyams, and there are facilities to do it. look on the positive side instead of listening to unwanted and uncalled for mouthings about the glory of performing rituals in our own home. shouldn't matter.

    another important aspect which i think we men ignore. this is a lot of work in the kitchen. within the theertham, there are professionals who do this work day in and day out. it also gives employment to poor brahmins.

    there is good coming out of doing karyams at brahma theerthams in more ways than one. ok?
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  14. #8
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    Hmmm....matured way of thinking. This is what the difference with my dear Kunjuppu sir postings...
    Kann Kalikkumpadi kandukonden Kadambadaviyil
    pann kalikkum kural veenaiyum kaiyum payodharamum
    mann kalikkum pachai vannamum aghi mathangar kula
    penngalil thondria emperumaatithan perazhage

    (Abirami Andhadhi)
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  16. #9
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    I also endorse Durga's views. I think the information posted by vijay sir is a solitary instance. Normally I do believe that these karyams are not shunned for doing in a house, by anybody.
    Reg Kunjuppuji's views: Though the intention is to be recognised and lived with, I am not able , some how, to subscribe to "not to permit doing these" in a house. Let the kartha decide that he should perform away . But refusal is not desirable. Regards
  17. All views expressed by the Members and Moderators here are that of the individuals only and do not reflect the official policy or view of the TamilBrahmins.com Website.
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  18. #10
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    Thumbs up Thanks for your responses

    I appreciate the responses given by all of you.

    I would also like to say that this is no solitary instance. I have moved closely with brihaspathis (vadhyars) while in mumbai and find a lot of difference between the way our community people think over there and here with respect to pithru karyams.

    Intention alone is not enough. How the ritual is performed is also important. Rituals performed like contracts may satisfy some people but some people may not find that satisfactory. As far as providing income opportunities to poor brahmin is concerned the cooks get paid better when they cook for such rituals at home than at common venues.

    Though my intention was not to speak about the whole community, the fact remains that a major portion of our people think ignorantly about these rituals. I completely agree with you about the ignorance aspect.

    My point here is not to demean people or argue whether the rituals should be performed at home or elsewhere. It is about making the people of our community enlightened on these aspects while discussing such subjects.
  19. All views expressed by the Members and Moderators here are that of the individuals only and do not reflect the official policy or view of the TamilBrahmins.com Website.
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